Saturday, November 10, 2012


It's time to pay the bills......


Only because I'm such a fan of 'The Wizard Of Oz'......


Toobworld Central has accepted a character played by George Lazenby to have been one of the many British secret agents known by the code name of "James Bond" - thanks to the reunion TV movie for 'The Man From U.N.C.L.E.'

So now we may know what the real name of that character is:


Are you tired of anything that has to do with political campaigns by now?  Gee, that's too bad.....



'How To Steal The Eiffel Tower'

"The Nick Velvet Stories"

Edward D. Hoch

Philippe Nicaud

Earth Prime-Time, France

From Wikipedia:
'Nick Verlaine or How to steal the Eiffel Tower' is a series of six episodes in French sixty minutes, It aired from July to August 1976 on TF1. The last of the six episodes never aired. 

Directed by Claude Boissol , it tells the story of a thief, Nick Verlaine, sort of a modern Arsène Lupin, who generates larcenies more zany and daring, like stealing the Garonne, a sleeper, a cassette that is in the cage of a tiger, the Loch Ness monster, and of course the Eiffel Tower, hence the title of the series. 

List of episodes: 
1- "Nick Verlaine takes the road," with Jean Rougerie (Poilvert), Virginie Vignon (Sylvette), Arch TAYLOR (Swedish), Jeanne HARDEYN (the Hungarian), Raymond BAECKER (Colonel), Claude Brovelli (TV presenter) 

2- "Be kind to animals," with André Weber (Berutti), Jean Rougerie (Poilvert), Georges BEAUVILLIERS (Jo), Virginie Vignon (Sylvette), Achille ZAVATTA (Hagenfield) 

3- "The daughter of the air" with Sandra MONTAIGU (Sirius), Carlo NEIL (the head nurse), Paul BISCIGLIA (the Commissioner), Claude Brovelli (TV presenter), Jean-Michel FARCY, François GUEDON 

4- "In the water of a pool," with Jean Rougerie (Poilvert) SAND Michèle (Sylvie), Mony DALMES (Lydia Babcock), Alain ADAIR (Melville) 

5- "The monster," with Edward MEEKS (Swift), Georges ATLAS (Tremolat), Billy Kearns (Crowder), Maryse MARTIN (Ms. Aubrac), Jean-Marie BON (the doctor), André Dumas. 

6- This episode in which Nick VERLAINE stole the Garonne was never released. 

Nick is a thief who works more to make impossible shots for profit. Philippe NICAUD who enjoyed success in the 60s with INSPECTOR Leclerc plays the role.  Note the amazing musical theme due to SHUMAN. 

To our knowledge, the series is available on the website of the INA. 

During his long tenure with Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, the prolific Edward D. Hoch entertained his fans with long-running series about several characters - the Gypsy King, Rand the Spymaster, and Dr. Sam Hawthorne of 1920's New England.  My favorite was gentleman thief Nick Velvet, who hired himself out to steal only items of no value - a used teabag, a comb used by a bald man....

When Mr. Hoch passed away, I advocated a TV series based on Nick Velvet for American TV.

And a few months later, after reading a collection of Hoch's stories about Nick Velvet, I posted my own thoughts about casting such a series.

And I think the subject matter and main character would be perfect for reviving the half-hour mystery format of shows like 'Peter Gunn'.

Even if you don't speak or read French, you can see from the credits that in this TF1 series Nick Verlaine is based on Nick Velvet.  But because his last name was changed, should Nick Velvet ever be portrayed on TV here in America, then both characters could comfortably exist in the same plane of "reality", Earth Prime-Time.

Had Philippe Nicaud portrayed Nick Velvet, then I might have no other choice but to ship the character off to the French Toobworld.

In the meantime, can't we get some Hollywood hotshot interested in bringing Nick Velvet to TV?


Friday, November 9, 2012


I saw it noted on Facebook this week that November 7, 1867, Marie Curie, a two-time Nobel Prize winner in science, was born.  To mark the occasion, the following photograph was published of Madame Curie:

As far as I'm concerned, that's an Observer from 'Fringe' standing in the background!

These "alien" humans from the Future were inducted into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame thanks to their appearances in reality-based shows on Fox like NASCAR races, 'American Idol', football games.  I made the case that one of them could also be seen in the background of an episode of 'Person Of Interest'.

I'm hoping that even after 'Fringe' finally ends this season, we'll still see an Observer every so often in the episode of some show, no matter what the network is.  Certain shows would be natural - 'Doctor Who', 'Mad Men', 'The Big Bang Theory'.  But it could be anywhere.

I'm still hoping to find them in other shows long since cancelled.  All it takes would be a bald man in a business suit with a fedora.

In the meantime, I'll take this pozz'ble sighting from the real world!

[My thanks to Tay Mueller for bringing this to my attention.]



"Everything weird ends up in Florida."
Arthur Dales
'The X-Files'

"A lot of weird stuff happens in South Florida."
Penelope Garcia
'Criminal Minds'




"The 11th Victim"

Nancy Grace

Metta World Peace (Ron Artest)

Earth Prime-Time, also Earth Prime-Time/MOTW

Garlin Fincher is the adviser and confidante to the story's heroine, Hailey Dean.  He's a former cop about to ship out to Afghanistan.

Ron Artest IS Metta World Peace IS Garlin Fincher, a veteran detective trading the mean streets of Atlanta for the wilds of Afghanistan. His reasons are his own, his methods unorthodox, but he always gets his man.

From Wikipedia:
Nancy Grace's first work of fiction, "The Eleventh Victim", also published by Hyperion, was released on August 11, 2009. The mystery thriller follows a young psychology student, Hailey Dean, whose fiancé is murdered just weeks before their wedding. She goes on to prosecute violent crime and is forced to reckon with what she left behind. Publishers' Weekly described it as "less than compelling."

"You can't quit because of one crazy scumbag."


Thursday, November 8, 2012


From TV Tropes:

When the evil character is finally brought to justice, he claims that he would've gotten away with it if it weren't for those "meddling kids" (or whoever it was who foiled his plot). He may be evil, but he gives credit where credit is due. The classic form is, "And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for you meddling kids!" The use of the phrase "meddling kids" is a classic Shout Out to Scooby-Doo.

'Perry Mason' is shown twice a day on ME-TV, 10 am and 11:30 pm. I watched an episode of 'Perry Mason' on Tuesday - "The Case Of The Frightened Fisherman". And at the end, the killer (No spoilers!) jumped up and shouted "And I would have gotten away with it if it hadn't been for you!"

This confused me because the person being talked to was not a meddling kid......

I suppose in a way, this could have been constructed as one of the "Echoes" posts.....




'Peyton Place'

Grace Metalious

Mia Farrow


Earth Prime-Time

From Wikipedia:
In the first episode, Dr. Michael Rossi (Ed Nelson) arrives from New York City to set up practice in town. Newspaper editor Matthew Swain (Warner Anderson) tells him people usually try to get away from towns like Peyton Place, not move to them.

Matthew's third cousin Allison MacKenzie (Mia Farrow), a close friend of classmate Norman Harrington (Christopher Connelly), has begun to fall in love with his older brother Rodney (Ryan O'Neal); she is smitten as soon as they share their first kiss. At the end of the episode, Allison's mother, Constance (Dorothy Malone) makes it clear she disapproves of her daughter's
 newfound relationship with Rodney.

[Allison was ] the quiet and smart daughter of Constance. She likes to spend her time reading books and usually befriends older people. She also becomes romantically involved with Rodney several times.

In the original novel, Allison was the illegitimate daughter of Constance MacKenzie, the owner of a clothing store in Peyton Place, a small community in New Hampshire, and an imported fabric store owner also named Allison MacKenzie (in the movie, her father was named Angus, and in the television series, he was a New York City businessman named James).

Three years after she was born, her father died. Constance and her mother, Elizabeth Standish, deliberately changed the year of birth on her birth certificate to make Allison seem a year younger than she really was. This led to quite a lot of friction between mother and daughter. Allison was sensitive and dreaming, unlike her practical and often distant mother. The friction between the two would escalate as Allison grew up.

In the television series, Allison is the daughter of Constance. Her father is believed to be an unknown man in a photo. Her real father ended up to be Elliot Carson, a wrongly convicted man. Constance doesn't want her daughter to know who her real father is. Allison reads a lot and doesn't have a lot of friends of her own age. She is good friends with Matthew Swain, an older man who works at the newspaper and she prefers to call uncle Matt.

She falls in love with the popular Rodney Harrington. They date for a short period, before Rodney knocks up Betty Anderson and marries her. He later admits he planned to runaway town with her if Betty hadn't gotten pregnant. After Rodney and Betty are divorced, he and Allison begin dating again, but Rodney's arrest for murder and Allison's coma (see below) tend to get in the way.

When Elliot is released from jail he returns to Peyton Place. Constance is afraid the truth will come up and tries to keep her away from him. However, she and Elliot become good friends after they find out they share the same interests. In this period, Allison also became good friends with her teacher Paul Hanley, the man who testified against Elliot in court.

She ends up finding out who Elliot really is and her good relationship with her mother was strained from that point forward. Even when Constance and Elliot get married, she does not approve. Meanwhile, she becomes the babysitter of Kim Schuster, a deaf 6-year old. Kim's father David Schuster constantly flirts with her.

Her bond with Kim ended abruptly when Marion Fowler involves her in a car accident. Allison is sent into a coma for several weeks. When she came out of it, she suffered from amnesia and couldn't remembered the entire past year. Therefore she didn't recognize Elliot as her father. The emotional package eventually became too much for her and she suffered a nervous breakdown. She ended up cutting her hair.

As noted above, in this period, she again had a relationship with Rodney. However, he couldn't handle her anymore and broke it off. She later became close to the blind Chris Webber. Chris was believed to be blinded by Ann Howard, but he confessed it was actually his brother Lee Webber who was responsible. Allison was nearly capable of handling all the emotional baggage until Ann died, when she decided to leave town.

Two television movies followed. The first; "Murder in Peyton Place" was broadcast on NBC in the fall of 1977. Billed as a reunion movie it focused on the mysterious deaths of Rodney Harrington and Allison MacKenzie, as well as a diabolical plot of a powerful person to ruin the community. It reunited original cast members Dorothy Malone, Ed Nelson, Tim O'Connor, Joyce Jillson, and Christopher Connelly.

The second; "Peyton Place: The Next Generation" which aired in the spring of 1985 on NBC, was conceived as a one-shot sequel, that would hopefully revive the popular series and was therefore also promoted as a television pilot. Although a new series of the show never came to fruition; the film did reunite original cast members Dorothy Malone, Ed Nelson, Tim O'Connor, James Douglas, Christopher Connelly, Ruth Warwick and Barbara Parkins, who had declined to appear in "Murder in Peyton Place".


Wednesday, November 7, 2012


From a 'M*A*S*H' wikia:
[Father] Mulcahy came from a rather large family [in Philadelphia] who weren't close, from things he revealed throughout the series. Both his parents drank, and displayed their temper on occasion; about the only thing he and his father had in common was an interest in boxing, and his father took him to fights. Mulcahy had to share a bed with his brothers, and the only family member he spoke fondly of was his sister Catherine. When given the chance to send greetings to his family during a filmed interview, he simply waved to the camera and said "Hello", adding nothing.

By 1961, one of Father Mulcahy's older brothers was living in Los Angeles where he worked as a building superintendent. Private investigator Paul Drake tricked him into opening up an apartment while he was in the guise of a TV repairman. But it was obvious that "Pops" was not taken in by the ruse.

'Perry Mason' - "The Case Of The Violent Vest"

Father Mulcahy - William Christopher
"Pops" (Mulcahy) - Bill Erwin

Since he was only addressed as "Pops", and listed in the credits as "Superintendent", we could probably find some other character played by Bill Erwin who was only listed by his first name and maybe situated in Los Angeles who could be the same character.

Does the name and maybe the face seem familiar to you? Here's how you probably best remember Bill Erwin......




Since the reporters for this newspaper hang out at Aces, a bar on 8th near 43rd, I'd say that this story took place in New York. As such, I believe this newspaper would be the New York Chronicle and not the World Chronicle.

That would link this episode to 
'The Patty Duke Show' and not to 'The Chronicle'......



During this year in which I have been featuring characters adapted from BookWorld for the "ASOTV" showcase, I have never dipped into the world of comic books or graphic novels. But I felt this was one time when I should. And there have been two novel adaptations of the comics so I could justify it in a sort of backdoor fashion.

There are spoilers ahead, but of nothing from this, the third season of the series.  (Well, yeah, there is a hint.......)

'The Walking Dead'

Robert Kirkman & Tony Moore

Saran Wayne Callies


Zombie Toobworld

From Wikipedia:
Lori Grimes is a fictional character from the comic book series 'The Walking Dead' and is portrayed by Sarah Wayne Callies in the American television series of the same name.

In the comic book series:
Lori Grimes was displayed as an average middle class housewife living in Cynthiana, Kentucky. As the outbreak began, she and Carl were evacuated out of the city with help from Rick's partner and best friend Shane Walsh, in hopes of getting to where her parents lived.

During the evacuation, the guilt that she had been wracked with over abandoning Rick led her to have a one night stand with Shane, which she deeply regretted afterward. She continually brushed off Shane's attempts at advances and ignored him even more when Rick miraculously arrived at their campsite.

She soon found out, after counting her missed periods, that she was pregnant, however she hesitated to tell anybody until after Shane's death and their move back onto the road.

She faced things such as morning sickness and mood swings throughout the first few months of her pregnancy. She and everyone else found relative stability at an abandoned prison, with hot showers, supplies, and security.

In Toobworld:
After her husband is wounded in the line of duty and left in a coma whilst the outbreak occurs, Lori, believing him to be dead, is accompanied by Rick's best friend Shane Walsh towards Atlanta, counting on him to keep both her and her son safe. They befriend Carol and her family on the road, and later both groups settle with other survivors on the outskirts of Atlanta. Lori, having been further convinced of Rick's death by witnessing the military bomb Atlanta, eventually succumbs to her distraught state and embarks on a passionate sexual relationship with Shane (without Carl’s knowledge). She is relieved when Rick returns with their scavenger group alive and well, while at the same time being wracked with guilt over her inadvertant affair with Shane. She bitterly ends her relationship with Shane, leading the two to have awkward confrontations. When the group leaves the camp and briefly spends time at the CDC, she is nearly raped by Shane.

In the second season, Lori begins to cling to Shane as much as she does Rick, realizing that both him and Rick are equally as valuable to her in terms of protection. She's willing to look past Shane's previous actions, however she continues to refute any notion that their relationship was genuine.

Days after arriving at Hershel's farm, Lori discovers she is pregnant with what may be Shane's baby, a discovery that terrifies her. After accepting the situation, Lori admits both her condition and her previous affair to Rick, the former of which he accepts, despite the baby almost certainly being Shane's.

She's confronted by Shane upon him learning of the matter from Rick, believing the baby to be his. She initially attempts to disregard this possibility, however she later finds it futile and admits that she'll never know. She still firmly makes it clear that even if it is Shane's, it will be raised by her and Rick. Her attitude toward Shane lightens up following Dale's death, with her apologizing for all that she had put him through.

Meanwhile, she takes notice to Carl's increasing coldness, a matter which concerns her as she looks ahead to the future. The group is forced to depart from the farm after a horde ascends onto the premises, leading them to camp on the side of the road.

Her path took several divergent paths between the comic books and the TV series, but still traveled along the same direction. You may have figured out why I chose her character to showcase, but even in that case there were differences between the two.


Tuesday, November 6, 2012


Every so often, 'Saturday Night Live' does a sketch lambasting the stupidity of the hosts on 'Fox & Friends'. And at the end of the sketch, a crawl runs up the screen showing the corrections made to their statements in the past two hours of the show.

I've been trying to collect them since the first sketch last year, and I'm pretty sure I've got them all. And since today is Election Day, I figured now was as good a time as any to share them......

From April, 2011:
  • President Barack Obama’s middle name is not 'Danger'. 
  • First Lady Michelle Obama was born in Illinois, to human parents. 
  • 'The first trimester' refers to a stage of pregnancy. It is not a Tom Clancy novel. 
  • Libya is a country in Africa. It is not part of Saudi Arabia. 
  • Singer Rebecca Black's song 'Friday' refers to a day of the week. Not the Chris Tucker movie. 
  • The American flag does not have an eagle on it. Nor is President Ronald Reagan’s picture on it. 
  • Hawaii is part of America. Hawaiians are not of Arabic descent. 
  • Lil Wayne is a popular hip hop artist. He has never toured with Wayne Newton. Nor does Wayne Newton have a dwarf brother. 
  • Apples are not vegetables. They are also not grown in Kenya. 
  • Most scallops are edible and safe when cooked. 
  • 'Jai Lai' is a sport played in Florida. It is not known if the activity is preferred by Mexican drug cartels. 
  • Bruno Mars is an American pop singer. He lives on Earth. He has never been indicted or convicted of organ trafficking. 
  • Green is a color. 
  • Moamar Quaddaffi is President of the country of Libya. He has never driven a taxi for a living. 
  • Ronald Reagan did not create the lottery. Nor did he invent casual Fridays. 
  • Jane Fonda lives in America. She has never been photographed with Osama Bin Laden. 
  • There is no, nor are there any plans for, a 'Six Flags Baghdad.' 
  • The Federal Food Stamp program was not created by Karl Marx.” 
  • Egypt has never had a mummy President. 
  • Your sexuality is not determined by your blood type. Nor is it determined by your enthusiasm about the songs of Lionel Ritchie. 
  • It is not possible to catch AIDS by having a beard. 
  • The state of Massachusetts has never mandated that Mohammed be put next to Jesus in Christmas nativity scenes. 
  • The sun is not made of 'hot gravy'. It is actually made up of several gasses. 
  • Cell phones do not cause Chlamydia. 
  • Filmmaker Michael Moore has never shut down the Macy’s Thanksgiving parade. 
  • Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas never fought in World War II. Nor was he ever given the 'Congressional Medal of Truth.' There is no such medal as the 'Congressional Medal of Truth.' 
  • A baby can only be created by sperm and an egg. A homosexual cannot create a baby using trickery and the Internet. 
  • Americans landed on the moon in 1969. This was part of the NASA space program and not to 'get away from hippies.' 
  • No one has ever eaten a pizza with their butt. 
  • Former President Bill Clinton had nothing to do with the Rebecca Black video "Friday.'"
From October, 2011:
  • The second president of the United States was John Quincy Adams, not Sam Adams summer Ale. 
  • A movie and motion picture are the same thing. 
  • Juice is a drinkable substance. 
  • There are seven continents not one thousand. 
  • The "West Memphis Three" is not a jazz quartet. 
  • America is not currently under a "level 9 liberty alert". There is no such thing as a "level 9 liberty alert." 
  • Presidential dog "Bo" Obama does not collect social security checks, nor is he an undocumented Peruvian housekeeper in disguise. 
  • Julie Andrews is an award winning British actress. She has never been on trial for kidnapping. 
  • Windows are typically made of glass 
  • President Obama did not pardon Carmen Sandiego 
  • Flu shots prevent influenza and have nothing to do with getting into heaven 
  • Nancy Pelosi did not appear on an episode of River Monsters 
  • There is not now, nor has there ever been a plan to air-condition the Grand Canyon 
  • Herman Cain did not invent Pizza. 
  • Christopher Columbus sailed to what is now the modern day United States in an effort to find a trade route to the West Indies. Not to flee the dragons. 
  • No Transformers have ever been found on the moon. 
  • Flo from the progressive Insurance ads is a living human being, not the ghost of a Civil War widow. 
  • Africa is widely regarded to be the origin of the human species. It was not "discovered only a handful of years ago." 
  • The Jewish Holiday just celebrated was Rosh Hashanah not Rush Hot Bananas. 
  • Nicholas Cage did not sign the Declaration of Independence. 
  • There is no known connection between the Oklahoma City Bombing and The Bay City Rollers 
  • Electric cars are not powered by electric eagles. 
  • Carrying a child in a Baby Bjorn does not cause homosexuality, in the child or the adult. 
  • The Washington Monument was not named after Denzel Washington. Nor was it named after the Washington Redskins. 
  • The Pope does not hold a world record in speed skating.
  • Abraham Lincoln is not alive and living in Amish, Pennsylvania. There is no such place as Amish, Pennsylvania. 
  • Mount Rushmore does not include the face of Spiderman. 
  • There are indeed several laws that prohibit pointing a gun at a mail carrier. 
  • Pocahontas was not named after a stripper. 
  • Vermont still exists. 
  • There is currently no bill before the house that would mandate the eating of flan on Thanksgiving. 
  • Mary Magdalene was not eaten by a dinosaur. 
  • General Tso did not win the Civil War for the Confederacy. 
  • Rick Perry was not a contestant on "The Amazing Race" nor was he the winner of the Real World/Road Rules Challenge 
  • "Time in a Bottle" was never the national anthem. 
  • Whole Foods does not provide free abortions.
From May, 2012:
  • There are currently no bills before the House that would require a woman to have a transvaginal ultrasound before buying sunglasses.
  • The Taliban is not producing a cereal called “Honey Bunches of Goats.” 
  • Kirk Cameron is not the voice of Siri. 
  • Miss America is not third in the order of succession for the Presidency, nor is Miss Teen USA fourth. 
  • Airplanes do not fly by flapping their wings.
  • Patricia Heaton did not win a Nobel Prize for her work on “Everybody Loves Raymond.” 
  • Hail consists of frozen water; it is not “made of sins.” 
  • President Obama does not plan to take the forwarding option away from e-mail. 
  • Disney World is not planning to add Rush Limbaugh to their Hall of Presidents. 
  • Nowhere in the Bible does it mention Garth Brooks or Chris Gaines. 
  • Turtles do not have “tiny TV’s and sofa beds” inside their shells. 
  • Pete Rose did not receive a lifetime ban from the Hallmark Hall of Fame.
  • “National Treasure” is not a documentary even though it feels very real. 
  • Wisconsin is an American state and not “just a bit.” 
  • Mormons breathe air. 
  • Horses do not have “teeth so sharp you wouldn't even believe it.” 
  • Children raised by same-sex couples are not statistically more likely to let the American flag touch the ground, 
  • “Psych” is a popular detective show on the USA Network, not a super-secret NASA Mind experiment. 
  • It takes more than five to six months of medical school to become a surgeon. 
  • Sour Patch Kids are a snack food and therefore physically incapable of pulling a knife on someone. 
  • Congress has not declared a war on jean shorts. 
  • It is unlikely that Fareed Zakaria is Willem Defoe in character. 
  • Babies tend to like hugs. 
  • It is not illegal to discard a Christmas tree. 
  • John Wilkes Booth was not wearing a hooded sweatshirt when he shot President Lincoln, nor were the Lincoln’s attending a staging of “The Vagina Monologues.” 
  • There is no federal program called “Cash for Bees.” 
  • You do not need a spaceship to get to China. 
  • The Watergate is a hotel in Washington D.C., not a portal to an undersea kingdom. 
  • The new World Trade Center does not transform into a karate robot. 
  • Seeing-eye dogs are neither able to nor allowed to drive. 
  • It is likely that immigrants do not feed on the blood of our cattle at night while we are all sleeping. 
  • Baseball is a land sport. 
  • It is widely accepted that ears are used for hearing.
From September, 2012:
  • The Bible was not a movie first.
  • Stalactites is not a childhood disease.
  • Iowa City never elected Mayor McCheese.
  • Allegra is not a religion.
  • Jeremy Lin was traded, not deported.
  • The sun and the moon do not high-five as they pass each other.
  • Vaginas don’t look like that
  • A dead person’s skull does not contain their memories.
  • Ron Paul is one person.
  • Not all cats are gay.
  • The Atlanta Hawks are a team, not an infestation.
  • Ellen Degeneres never married a car.
  • Benedict Arnold was not a character on Diff’rent Strokes.
  • A wind turbine has never cut off the head of a pretty girl in a convertible.
  • The Tasmanian Devil is not the president of Tasmania.
  • Star Wars is essentially a work of fiction.
  • Al Gore never claimed to invent Nintendo.
  • Hawaii does not rotate every six months.
  • Neil Armstrong was not the first person to moon someone.
  • The Keystone Pipeline is not filled with Keystone Light.
  • Swiss banks are not “full of holes.”
  • Camp David does not have a sister camp called Camp Denise.
  • Oogielovie is not a sexually transmitted disease.
  • They did not make Mars after the Mars Rover.
  • Monica Lewinsky was never in an internment camp.
  • Six comes after five.
  • Kim Jong-Un is not the CEO of Yahoo.
  • Left-handed people cannot read your thoughts.
  • Lobsters are not “ocean spiders.”
  • Cat Fancy is a magazine, not a man/cat dating website.
  • The U.S. Postal Service never released a Kesha stamp.
  • “F” is not a blood type.
  • Parsley is not one of the Spice Girls.
  • Usain Bolt is not a new action movie starring John C. Reilly.
  • Libor is not a giant praying mantis.
  • Old Navy is not one of the armed forces.
  • The letters in “Massachusetts” cannot be rearranged to spell “same sex marriage.”
  • Crabs don’t breast feed.
  • Animal Planet is not an acceptable nickname for Telemundo.
  • Marco Rubio does not play for the Timberwolves.
  • Al Jazeera is not the co-host of “Tool Time.”
  • Babies never “skip ahead” to being 10.
  • Angela Merkel is not a palindrome.
  • You can’t outrun polio.
  • The Negro League is not “back and better than ever.”
  • Latin inches is not the Mexican metric system.
  • The Russian national anthem is not the U.S. national anthem played backwards.
  • Rocky never fought Lassie.
From this past weekend:
  • Transitions lenses do not reverse the gender of your eyes.
  • Sandy Duncan did not “sponsor” the hurricane.
  • There are many black people, not just one who is a master of disguise.
  • Brian Kilmeade did not invent the term “smoke ‘em if you got ‘em.”
  • Not all pigs are born with human feet.
  • Angela Merkel is not the female version of Steve Urkel.
  • It is permissible to say the word “Mexican” on television.
  • There is no celebrity named Rape Romano.
  • Condoms work every day of the week. Not just Tuesdays.
  • Trees do not have bones. 
  • There are a finite number of people in China.
  • Burritos are not “male tacos.”
  • The Constitution is a living document, but it cannot walk around.
  • Chef Boyardee is not the Prime Minister of Italy. He is the Vice President.
  • Paul Ryan is not faster than a cheetah.
  • FEMA is not slang for female.
  • Many Hispanics own their own cars.
  • The Statue of Liberty was not a gift from Santa.
  • At no point has Dorf been the number one golfer in the world.
  • Lance Armstrong did not trade a testicle for steroids.
  • Michael J. Fox does not have “multiple sandwiches.”
  • Apple Maps is not a map showing where the apples are.
  • 8 is a multiple of 4.
  • Women’s vaginas are below their waists.
  • “Kris Krostie” is not Chris Christie with his pants on backwards.
  • Afi Komen was never the U.N. Secretary General.
  • Haitian does not mean “half-Asian.”
  • Last Wednesday was Halloween. Not a “ghost invasion.”
  • Mr. Met has never announced a preference for any religion over the other.
  • Chef Boyardee is not the Vice President of Italy.

Created with Gifboom

Of course, if Romney wins the election, I don't think I'd find anything about the Fox broadcasting company to be humorous anymore.

I've added the names of Doocy and Kilmeade to the Telvish "lexxicon". The word "kilmeade" is a poisoned drink. I think you can probably guess what "doocy" stands for......




1] PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA ('Saturday Night Live')
When President Obama loses his temper, he transforms from Barack Obama into "The Rock" Obama, an overly muscled Hulk-like creature. (Skitlandia)

The 2nd President was kidnapped and held for ransom, but was rescued by Daniel Boone. (Earth Prime-Time)

3] GEORGE WASHINGTON ('Bewitched')
The "Father Of Our Country" was magically zapped into the 20th Century home of a witch. (Earth Prime-Time - however Washington was zapped out of a picture book.)

4] HARRY S. TRUMAN ('Futurama')
"Give 'Em Hell, Harry" met an alien crustacean named Dr. Zoidberg when the Planetary Express delivery spaceship traveled back in Time to Roswell, New Mexico, 1947. (The Tooniverse)

5] JOHN F. KENNEDY ('The Twilight Zone')
At the last second before he was struck by a bullet in Dealey Plaza in Dallas (November 22, 1963), JFK was transported to the far Future and was replaced by one of his descendents. Kennedy lived out his years as a professor at Harvard. (Earth Prime-Time)

6) ABRAHAM LINCOLN ("Toonces, The Cat Who Can Drive A Car" special)
"Honest Abe" built a time machine and learned that in the Future he would be assassinated. He then kept going back in Time to kill John Wilkes Booth first, but never succeeded. But the attempts made Booth so angry that he ended up killing Lincoln, so it was the President's fault for meddling in Time. (Skitlandia)





E. W. Hornung

Christopher Strauli

Earth Prime-Time

From Wikipedia:
Harry Manders (almost exclusively known as Bunny Manders) is a character in the popular series of Raffles novels by E.W. Hornung. He is the faithful companion of Raffles, a cricketer and gentleman thief, who makes a living robbing the rich in late Victorian British High Society.
Whereas Raffles is sharp-witted and cynical, the younger Bunny is more innocent and idealistic. Raffles often uses this naivete to his own benefit, and the two are commonly companions on the various burglaries they commit.

Raffles and Bunny had attended the same public school together, though there had been a considerable age gap between them. Bunny had always admired the older, charming Raffles who was a top sportsman and seemed to prevail in anything he did. After some years without contact, the two were reunited at Raffles' chambers for a baccarat game. Bunny returns later to ask for Raffles' help, as Bunny had fallen into considerable debt. Admiring his pluck, Raffles tricks Bunny into joining him on a burglary, and the two become companions in crime.

Together the two launch a series of daring robberies on London society, until they are eventually exposed in "The Gift of the Emperor" and arrested on board a passenger liner. Raffles leaps overboard and is presumed drowned, while Bunny is returned to England to serve a term in prison. After his release some years later, a mysterious newspaper advertisement reunites him with Raffles and they both go undercover. The two men continue their crime spree, now acting as outlaws.

In 1899 both Raffles and Bunny volunteer for service in the Second Boer War where soldiers of the British Empire were fighting the Boer guerillas. After uncovering an enemy spy, Raffles is killed in battle and Bunny is badly wounded. He returns to England to write Raffles' memoirs.


'Agatha Christie's Poirot'
"Three Act Tragedy"

Dame Agatha Christie

Tom Wisdom


Earth Prime-Time

From the PBS Synopsis:
Sir Charles Cartwright, the retired, renowned British stage actor, hosts his old friend Hercule Poirot at a dinner party at his Cornwall mansion. When one of the guests, the harmless old Reverend Babbington, chokes to death on his cocktail, Poirot dismisses murder because the drinks were passed randomly. This, he asserts, means that any one of Cartwright's guests might have taken the poisoned drink, had there been one.

Sir Charles is still convinced of murder, and watching his beloved Egg in an intimate conversation with his handsome young rival, Oliver Manders, he gloomily resolves to meet up with Poirot in Monte Carlo. 

In Monte Carlo weeks later, Poirot is greeted by Cartwright only to learn that Strange has died, this time indisputably of murder. At his Yorkshire estate, where he houses a sanatorium, the famous nerve doctor Strange had hosted nearly all of the same guests [from the first party.] Also joining the group, uninvited, was Oliver Manders, who showed up bloodied and injured after supposedly crashing his motorbike while passing by. 

In London, Poirot is visited by Egg and the nervous Oliver, who admits that his motorbike crash was a fake. Strange had sent a letter requesting the stunt, but, Oliver explains, seemed genuinely surprised when he showed up. 

Poirot and his amateur detectives Sir Charles and Egg separately question the other guests, learning that Reverend Babbington had warned Egg away from Oliver.

From the source:
At the office of Messrs Speier & Ross, Mr Satterthwaite asked for Mr Oliver Manders and sent in his card.

Presently he was ushered into a small room, where Oliver was sitting at a writing-table.

The young man got up and shook hands.

'Good of you to look me up, sir,' he said.

His tone implied.

'I have to say that, but really it’s a damned bore.'

After the turn of the 20th Century, Bunny Manders met and married a young lady of the Family Oliver. (The mystery novelist Ariadne Oliver would later marry into this family as well. One branch of the family tree would lead to Maxxie Oliver, born around 1990.)

Bunny and his wife had a son around 1902, and graced him with her family's surname as his Christian name.

Oliver Manders grew up with an interest in the Communist party, but an even greater interest in young socialite Hermione Lytton-Gore, who was better known in her circle as "Egg."

Two for Tuesday!

[Every so often I dedicate one of these Inner Toob posts to someone.  For this look at the Manders pere et fils, I'm dedicating it to Win Scott Eckert, the Caretaker for the Wold Newton Family and Universe.  As most of the characters mentioned (save for Maxxie Oliver) are from literary sources, it might prove to be in his wheelhouse.....]


Monday, November 5, 2012


Up until now I've had to use a movie to illustrate what has become a common Toobworld situation - identical twins raised in two different families and with two different last names. (Most recently I wrote about this with the autopsy surgeons in Los Angeles, Drs. McLeod and Hoxie.)

For these situations I've had to use "The Parent Trap", either version, to illustrate "The Twin Dilemma". But now I have a TV show episode so that I can keep it all contained with the TV Universe of Earth Prime-Time.

Although we never saw Phyllis Monroe of Redding, California, she was the identical twin sister of Glamis Barlowe [left], one of the suspects in the case. And their resemblance to each other was a key point in the court case. Their mother gave Phyllis to another couple to raise for some reason. (It could be due to Mr. and Mrs. G.W. Monroe being so wealthy.)

Always finding something new in the old classics.....



From the 1920s until shortly before he died, Belgian sleuth Hercule Poirot had a butler in his employ by the name of George. Apparently we never learned what his surname was... in BookWorld. But since the Toobworld Dynamic is only concerned with the televersion of George, I'd like to suggest that his last name was Wynant.

Taking it a step further, I'm going to claim that George Wynant was the brother of C.H. Wynant, father of "She Who Must Be Obeyed", Hilda Rumpole.

Tele-Genetics are very strong and entire DNA sequences can repeat several times down through any family's lineage. (This was firmly established in the 'Simon And Simon' episode "The Apple Doesn't Fall Far From The Tree".)  This is why Nicholas Rumpole, son of Horace and Hilda, looks so much like a younger version of his Great Uncle George.