Wednesday, August 18, 2010


Toobworld is full of inanimate objects that talk. Some of them are due to reincarnation, like the car in 'My Mother The Car', Milton the Toaster in those Pop-Tarts blipverts, and the Geisler shopping cart in the commercial for Geisler Supermarkets.

But there could be other reasons for other talking objects, including this talking sandwich:

In the TV reunion movie "I Still Dream Of Jeannie", the genie's twin sister (known as Jeannie II because their mother was an "efficiency expert") played a dirty trick on Jeannie I. She reminded the head of the genies that a genie on Earth cannot go more than 3 months without an earthly master. And since Colonel Nelson was off on a top-secret space mission and technically no longer "earthly", Jeannie had to find a new master. What happened since then?

I think Jeannie II eventually found herself in the same straits as her sister and she was forced to get a new master. But that doesn't mean she had to be happy about it.

Here's a pozz'bility: the master chosen by Jeannie II was some schmuck who worked public relations for the orange juice industry's advisory board. Perhaps Jeannie didn't choose him at all; maybe he gained control of her genie bottle and forced her to do his bidding.

Of course, he may not have trusted her; he probably figured he should test her abilities to serve him first. He decided to start off simple with his wish-list.

And so he commanded her - and I'm sure you saw this coming a mile away - "Make me a sandwich."

And now that schmuck is stuck living with his brother's family* where at least he's relatively safe from being eaten....... So long as that growing teen doesn't need to keep stoking that bottomless pit


* At least it should be his brother's family since that's how such sitcoms work. Besides, you're less likely to get eaten by family....

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