WHATCHOO TALKIN' 'BOUT? WILLIS!

It's all in the punctuation........


Tom Willis of 'The Jeffersons' married Helen Douglas in 1952 and had two children, Jenny and Allan. He worked as an editor for the Pelham Publishing Company, but in the 1980s, he went into partnership with his neighbor (and the father-in-law to Jenny) George Jefferson, investing in "Charlie's Bar".

It's my theory that in the late 1980s, after his daughter Jenny divorced Lionel Jefferson, Tom Willis began his soul-searching to find more meaning to his life. This journey of self-awareness was heightened by the tensions in his relationship with his son Allan, who used to live on a commune, and then by the death of his wife Helen sometime after 1995.

There had to be something more meaningful for Tom to do than just be an editor making sure there weren't too many exclamation points in a manuscript.

It wasn't so much religion per se, but I think Tom found a higher calling by getting more active in local politics, in order to bring him closer to his son and his views. Eventually he might have become a Justice of the Peace, and as such, he would have been empowered by the State of New York to perform wedding ceremonies.

In May of 1999, Justice Of The Peace Thomas Willis was scheduled to marry William Truman to Rosario Salazar. It was really a sham marriage, as Will was gay and only going through with the scheme to make sure Rosario was allowed to stay in the country.

That happened in the first season finale of 'Will & Grace'. Looking through the list of TV credits for Franklin Cover, who played Tom Willis, he also appeared in the second of two 'All In The Family' episodes that launched the 'The Jeffersons' as a spin-off.

It doesn't look likely that he played the role in anything else, but with the stretch that he could have been the JP for that 'W&G' episode, I'd be happy to induct him some day into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame... on the birthday honors list, of course. (When what I say, goes.)

I mentioned that there were two episodes of 'All In The Family' which were instrumental in the creation of 'The Jeffersons'. But the first one concerned the wedding of Lionel and Jennie, and it featured Charles Aidman as Tom Willis.

I wrote about this once before in my old Tubeworld Dynamic website when it was still active. It's my belief that this is no Zonk!, nor is it a case of a 'Quantum Leap' from the future. (Although I think that's a possibility as to why there were two Lionel Jeffersons during the run of the show.)

We can also rule out aliens, robots, demonic possession, illness, weight gain, and plastic surgery as reasons why Tom Willis should look so different from one episode to the next.

It's always best to go for the simplest reason. And in this case, there were two Tom Willises at that wedding reception.

Archie met a cousin of the bride's father, who also had the same name. (It's not an uncommon occurrence.) In and of itself, this could have been the end of it, but the other Tom Willis finally let it slip that he was the bride's father.

As he didn't give a rat's backside to being at the wedding in the first place, Archie probably wasn't paying close enough attention to the ceremony to have noticed that the man who gave the bride away was not the same man he was talking to at the cash bar. He certainly didn't object when this Tom Willis made that claim.

I think there could be two reasons why the first Tom Willis would claim to be Jenny's father. One was that he was becoming disgusted with Archie's observations on the blacks attending the reception and wanted to put him in his place in the strongest way possible.

But then again, it could be that he really was Jenny's dad!

Nothing is purely black and white in life - except for the bride and groom that were on top of Tom and Helen's wedding cake. Although we don't often see it, all TV characters have shades of gray. It's always possible that Helen Douglas Willis cheated on her husband with his cousin and gave birth to a daughter which she passed off as her husband's.

It's a plot stand-by that is quite common in soap operas which are a major factor in the TV Universe.

This might also splain why their daughter was black and their son Allan looked more white - a difference in the donor DNA.

It was obvious that the Tom Willis played by Charles Aidman was pretty much in his cups at the bar when Archie struck up the conversation with him. Otherwise he might never let slip such a revelation no matter what the reasoning behind it.

As to why we never saw Franklin Cover as the true Tom Willis in that episode..... Well, it was 'All In The Family' and as 'Lost' episode guides might have put it, the show was Archie-centric. Obviously the "Cover version" never wandered into Archie's orbit to be noticed in the story.

And so ends this Willis Screed.

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

"CLAW & ORDER"

TV producer Dick Wolf has done pretty well for himself when it comes to being an overlord in the TV Universe. (I am a mere caretaker.) Currently, he has three TV series filling up slots in the NBC schedule - 'Law & Order', 'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit', and 'Law & Order: Criminal Intent'.

And when I say "slots", I mean that sometimes these shows are used to plug the holes in the sked when other shows tank.

He's had his own failures in the past, of course - 'Deadline' and 'Law & Order: Trial By Jury', which were both part of the 'L&O' franchise in their own ways. Although to be fair, 'Trial By Jury' was a very good show but NBC was nervous for better ratings almost immediately and so 'twas untimely ripped from the schedule.

He's also produced a reality show in the 'Law & Order' mold, and now has a new series to be set in his Toobworld bailiwick - 'Conviction'. This show will feature Stephanie March as ADA Alexandra Cabot, who used to be a regular on one of his other shows, 'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit'.

So even though he's molded a reality show to fit the 'L&O' mold (Mmmmmm.... Now I want a Jell-O mold.), there's one corner of the TV market in which Dick Wolf has not conquered with the 'Law & Order' brand......

Saturday morning children's programming.

It must keep him awake at nights, I'm sure! Lying there in his bed stuffed with 'L&O' revenue; gazing up at the ceiling; wondering how he can finally corner the market in kiddie TV with 'L&O' characters.

And this week, he could have found just what he was looking for in the news.....

From a report filed by WCBS-TV reporter John Slattery:

"Talk about an unlikely investigator for the Brooklyn D.A. It's a cat named Fred, who was specially deputized to help in a sting operation that resulted in the arrest of a former veterinary technician, Steven Vassall, 28, of East Flatbursh.

Brooklyn DA Charles J. Hynes said Vassall allegedly masqueraded as a vet, even doing surgery.

The DA believes Vassall may have been practicing for the last seven years. What was odd was that he didn't work out of an office. His practice was strictly house calls.

Hynes showed reporters an undercover videotape. Investigators had set up a sting in an apartment, using Fred the cat as bait. Vassell allegedly agreed to neuter Fred for $135... and then he was arrested."

'Law & Order: Pet Squad' or 'Undercover Pets' or 'Felony Felines'..... So long as the title was preceded by 'Law & Order', Dick Wolf would be happy.

Maybe they could bring in Moose, the Jack Russell terrier who played Eddie on 'Frasier', to be the cat's partner. I don't think Moose has found much gainful employ since 'Frasier' went off the air, save for a few "Coach" print adverts.

Perhaps a special guest appearance by Dog, the basset hound owned by 'Columbo', and the cockatoo from 'Baretta' could appear in a very special episode during Sweeps - "When Celebrity Pet Owners Go Bad".

And as a network crossover to please the hierarchy on the Peacock Throne at NBC, why not an episode featuring the bad driving skills of Toonces from 'Saturday Night Live'? (It was mostly a puppet in those sketches, but the real Toonces has already joined John and Gilda and Phil and Danitra and Uncle Mike in that big Studio 8-H in the sky.....)

Of course, in the long run Dick Wolf would probably pass on the idea. It's not like the Animal Planet network hasn't already done this kind of story several times over. So this new concept to present stories "ripped from the headlines" would end up being de-clawed.......

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

"Never trust a female, even the four-legged variety."
Number Six
'The Prisoner'

I HAVE FOUND IT!

Sci Fi Channel must have seen how well original series did over the last few summers for cable outlets like TNT, USA, and FX - 'The Closer', 'Monk', 'The 4400', 'Rescue Me', 'Starved' -#

Okay, so it'll always be a crapshoot.

Anyway, Sci Fi has picked up the option to run 11 episodes of 'Eureka', a series for which the 2 hour pilot movie had not even been broadcast yet.

'Eureka' takes place in the Pacific Northwest, which helps expande the locations of the TV Universe. The Northwest is already home to other locales of off-beat happenings - 'Twin Peaks', Lynchboro ('Wiseguy'), and that focal point for freeky, Seattle. Really, Seattle. 'Glory Days', 'John Doe', 'The 4400', 'Frasier'...''

Eureka is totally populated by scientists who are conducting top-secret research for the government, which should provide plenty of story lines despite the self-contained, restricted locale.

The type of experiments should also yield a bonanza of hypothetical links to other shows. And already I have dream suggestions for guest stars:

Richard Belzer as Detective John Munch
David Duchovny as former FBI Agent Fox Mulder

'Eureka' automatically lands on the top of my summer must-see list if only because of the opportunities to link it all up!

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

SUNDAY MORNING FUN

Movies That

Won't Be Shown

on the Lifetime

Network.

BY SHYRA LATIOLAIS
- - - -
Mother, May I Marry a Nice Doctor You Really Like?
The Ideal Husband (Not Meant Ironically)
A Child Accounted For and in No Danger
The Amicable Divorce and Custody Agreement
A Pleasant Family Christmas
The Man Who Was as Nice as He Initially Appeared to Be
My Daughter's Internet Pen Pal Who Is Another Preteen Girl
The Successful Surgery That Improved the Quality of the Patient's Life
The Number of Children We Planned For, All Healthy

Thanks to TVSquad.com for pointing out this website to me:
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/

Lots of great lists, including ones for Klingon Fairy Tales & Recipes, and Bruce Springsteen songs with more appropriate titles

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

THOUGHTS 'PON MY DEATH ON A SNOWY MORN

I went to QuizGalaxy.com during the night at work (with this snowstorm, it's waaaay slow on the job right now!) and took the quiz to find out where I would end up after death.....

"After death, you will continue to exist as if nothing has ever happened. You will continue to be yourself, but because you are in a parallel universe, some things will be different. You may not have married the same person, you might live in a different spot, but you will be the same person underneath it all and you will continue your life unaware that you ever died."

Sounds like the Toobworld novel concept.

And more than likely, this type of thing has already happened.....

BCnU!

Tele-Toby

THIS WEEK IN ZONK!S

The latest issue of "Entertainment Weekly" reports on 'Magnum, P.I.' being optioned for a theatrical movie release. They also made suggestions for the casting, among which they offered:

Matthew McConnaughey as Thomas Magnum
Chi McBride as TC
Ricky Gervais as Higgins

I'd buy that for a dollar!

But on the whole, I hate remakes of TV shows as films. The only reason I tolerate them - because they give me an escape should some TV show mention the original TV show, when both shows should exist in the same universe. (Unfortunately, this doesn't help when it comes to movies that also exist in the TV Universe, like the 1966 "Batman", the "Star Trek" franchise, and "The X-Files: Fight The Future".)

For instance, should a TV show make reference to the characters of the 1960s cornpone comedy 'The Beverly Hillbillies', I could then make the claim that it's a reference to the 1993 movie which was based on their "lives". (The movie featured a cameo by private eye Barnaby Jones appearing as himself.)

But that's only good for TV shows which were broadcast since the movie's release. If the reference is from before the premiere, I'm Zonk!ed.

There's one TV series that made a 'Beverly Hillbillies' reference just this past week, and the movie excuse can't work.

'That 70s Show'.

After hearing Randy's ideas for a romantic Valentine's Day, which included tickets to a monster truck rally, Donna said it was what any girl might desire... if that girl was Granny from 'The Beverly Hillbillies'.

Since the show takes place sometime during the 1970s, two decades before the movie version of "The Beverly Hillbillies".....

ZONK!

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

"Any schedule without Buddy Ebsen sucks eggs."
George Utley
'Newhart'

SPOT ON: THE KING OF SWEDEN

There are so many historical personages who have televersions in Toobworld that are seen so often - JFK and Jackie O, Abe Lincoln, Jesus, Hitler, Marilyn Monroe.... They appear so often, you'd think every other TV movie was about them!

But there are plenty of people in History who deserve their moment on the stage of the "Glass Furnace". And every so often I'll give one of them their moment in the spotlight.

And to kick it off, King Gustaf VI of Sweden.

In one of the earliest episodes of 'Green Acres', the mother of Oliver Douglas was bemoaning her son's hair-brained idea to move to Hooterville to become a farmer. She especially felt bad for her daughter-in-law, Lisa - the Hungarian ex-patriate was reduced to making her bed from outside the window, and yet there once was a time when she had been presented to the King of Sweden.

I see no reason why the Toobworld Timeline should not jibe with the Real World when it comes to the Swedish monarchy, so it had to be Gustaf VI Adolf who met Lisa Douglas.

Gustaf VI Adolf (Oskar Fredrik Wilhelm Olaf Gustaf Adolf) (November 11, 1882 – September 15, 1973) was King of Sweden from 1950 until his death. He was the eldest son of King Gustaf V and his wife Victoria of Baden.

At birth he was created Duke of Skåne. On October 29, 1950, he succeeded his father on the throne. In 1950, Prince Gustaf Adolf became king at age 67 upon the death of his father, King Gustaf V.

During Gustaf's reign, work was underway on a new constitution — eventually taking effect in 1975 after Gustaf's death — to replace the 1809 constitution and produce reforms consistent with the times. Among the reforms sought by some Swedes was the replacement of the monarchy or at least some moderation of the old constitution's provision that "The King alone shall govern the realm."

Gustaf Adolf's personal qualities made him popular among the Swedish people. In turn, this popularity led to strong public opinion in favor of the retention of the monarchy.

Gustaf Adolf's expertise and interest in a wide range of fields (architecture and botany being but two) made him respected, as did his informal and modest nature and his purposeful avoidance of pomp.

The affection and respect for which the Swedish people felt for Gustaf VI Adolf led to the retention of the monarchy as a symbol of continuity. But the monarchy was made subordinate to a democratic state: many of the powers of the Swedish monarchy died with King Gustaf Adolf in 1973. Additional powers of the monarch were removed when Sweden's constitutional reform became complete in 1975.

Gustaf VI Adolf was a devoted archaeologist, and was admitted to the British Academy for his work in botany in 1958. Gustaf participated in archaeological expeditions in China, Greece, and China, and founded the Swedish Institute in Rome.

Gustaf died in 1973 at age 90 after a deterioration in his health that culminated in inflammation of the lungs. He was succeeded on the throne by his 27-year-old grandson Carl XVI Gustaf, son of the late Prince Gustaf Adolf. In a break with tradition, Gustaf VI was not buried in Riddarholmskyrkan in Stockholm, but in the royal burial grounds in Haga.
[edited from the Wikipedia entry]

I'm thinking that Lisa Douglas was presented to the King of Sweden around 1960. By then, her husband Oliver must have been a respected partner in his law firm who had many dealings with influential clients on the international scene. I could see "Oleevarrh" moving among the powerful elite in social events, and since I think he would have been a liberal democrat, I'm guessing he might have been invited to the Kennedy White House at some point for a state dinner.

It might have been at that state dinner where Lisa Douglas was presented to King Gustaf VI Adolf of Sweden.

And even though he was the monarch of the realm, I have no doubt that Gustaf VI was thoroughly enchanted by her many charms.

(Okay, who snickered "Both of them"?)

This has been a good example of David Bianculli's theory of tele-literacy: TV can be a teaching tool if you don't just let it wash over you.

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

THE HAT SQUAD: FRANKLIN COVER

My first awareness of Franklin Cover in Toobworld was from "Between Time And Timbuktu", an adaptation of several short stories and vignettes from the novels of Kurt Vonnegut.

(Somebody at TV Land or the Sci-Fi Channel really should consider resurrecting that to be seen by a new generation!)

Cover's portrayal of Tom Willis on 'The Jeffersons' might seem tame in today's view, but I think his big, friendly face helped to ease America into the idea of a racially mixed marriage on TV. And if I'm not mistaken, it happened at a time when I think there were still some states with anti-miscegenation laws in their books.

So, in that regard, he could be considered a pioneer just for playing a supporting role on a sitcom.

I'll have more on the character of Tom Willis soon......

TV SERIES
"The Jeffersons" .... Tom Willis

TV SEQUELS
Columbo: A Trace of Murder (1997) (TV) .... Harry Jenkins
A Perry Mason Mystery: The Case of the Lethal Lifestyle (1994) (TV)

TV PILOTS
"All in the Family"
- The Jeffersons Move on Up (1975) TV Episode .... Tom Willis

TV MOVIES
Change at 125th Street (1974) (TV) (as Frank Cover)
Short Walk to Daylight (1972) (TV) .... Conductor
Between Time and Timbuktu (1972) (TV) .... Col. Donald 'Tex' Pirandello

TV BIOGRAPHY/HISTORY
A Woman Called Golda (1982) (TV) .... Hubert Humphrey
The Day the Bubble Burst (1982) (TV) .... Herbert Hoover

TV GUEST APPEARANCES
"Will & Grace"
- Object of My Rejection (1999) TV Episode .... Justice of the Peace
"Mad About You"
- The 2nd Mrs. Buchman (1998) TV Episode .... Yankee Infielder
"Too Something"
- Eric's Book (1996) TV Episode .... Professor Skaggs
"Coach"
- Luther Get Your Gun (1996) TV Episode .... Gunnar
"Batman"
- Harley's Holiday (1994) TV Episode (voice) (as Frank Cover) .... General Vreeland
"Living Single"
- School Daze (1994) TV Episode .... Professor Fletcher
"ER"
- Day One (1994) TV Episode .... Mr. Thurnhurst
"In the Heat of the Night"
- Unfinished Business (1991) TV Episode .... Tommy Vincent
- Just a Country Boy (1991) TV Episode .... Tommy Vincent
"Who's the Boss?"
- Let Her Tell You 'bout the Birds and the Bees (1991) TV Episode .... Mr. Campell
- Ms. Mom (1991) TV Episode .... Mr. Kimball
[It's my opinion that this is an error on the part of the IMDb; that both characters should be named "Kimball".]
"227"
- The Butler Did It (1988) TV Episode .... Alfred
"The Love Boat"
- Your Money or Your Wife/Joint Custody/The Temptations (1985) TV Episode .... Marvin Brown
"N.Y.P.D."
- The Patriots (1968) TV Episode .... Pepper
"The Jackie Gleason Show"
- The Honeymooners: Be It Ever So Humble (1967) TV Episode .... Police Officer
- The Honeymooners: Flushing Ho! (1967) TV Episode .... Police Officer
"Naked City"
- Kill Me While I'm Young So I Can Die Happy (1962) TV Episode .... Jergens

BCnU.....
Tele-Toby

RE: IN "CAR NATION"

Two weeks ago, 'Supernatural' tackled a common theme in the TV Universe - the reincarnation of human souls as motorized vehicles.

'Struth - it's more common than you might think!

As stated in the theme song for 'My Mother The Car', apparently everybody in Toobworld knows that we are all reincarnated eventualy. And in the show, again according to the song, Dave Crabtree's mother made the choice to come back as the 1928 Porter instead of as another human being or even as an animal like a dog, or an organ grinder's monkey, or even as a bowl of petunias (all of which have been reincarnated humans in one TV outlet or another).

This same voluntary decision to become a car must have been made by the vengeful spirit who possessed Oliver Pope's car in "You Drive", an episode of 'The Twilight Zone'. Pope had struck a boy with the car and fled the scene. Afterwards his car came alive in order to force him into owning up to his crime.

It's unclear as to who that spirit might have been - it's certainly not the boy as he was not yet dead. Maybe it was the soul of one of the boy's deceased relatives. Or perhaps it was the soul of a children's welfare advocate; maybe somebody who once worked with Neil Brock. ('East Side/West Side')

Another vengeful spirit operating heavy machinery might have been "Killdozer". But it's believed that an alien being was actually at the controls in some way.

Whether the relentless truck in "Duel" was possessed or controlled by aliens or just manually operated by a human being was never resolved. We never got a really good look inside the cab of that truck. But at the same time, I don't think it was ever a consideration to be anything else than just a mad trucker behind the wheel. Things were less complicated back in the early 1970s.....

KITT of 'Knight Rider' would not fall into this category. It's neural net, probably based on the cybernetic designs of Questor and Hymie the Robot, mirrored an actual personality.

Over in the Tooniverse, auto-reincarnation could be the splainin for 'Speed Buggy'. And 'Turbo-Teen' was a true interface between car and man - an 'Automan', if you'll forgive me for mentioning that.

(In the 'Futurama' episode "The Honking", the robot Bender transformed into a were-car at night.)

As for the 'Supernatural' truck in "Route 666", it was the evil, murderous soul of young Cyrus Dorian, a racist who had been killed in the early 1960s. But as Dorian had murdered several people while he was alive, his monster truck rally of retribution only staved off the inevitable - a one way ticket to Hell.

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

Toobnote: It's possible that the family name of "Dorian" was handed down as a first name to a cousin so as to reinforce the familial link to a new generation.

And thus Dorian Lord of 'One Life To Live' might provide a "family tie" to 'Supernatural'.....

Everybody knows in a second life, we all come back sooner or later.

As anything from a pussycat to a man eating alligator.

Well you all may think my story, is more fiction than it's fact.

But believe it or not my mother dear decided she'd come back.
As a car...

She's my very own guiding star.

A 1928 Porter. That's my mother dear.

'Cause she helps me through everything I do

And I'm so glad she's near.
My Mother the Car.

My Mother the car.
Paul Hampton

'My Mother The Car'

MARK SLOAN, MACH TWO

From the "Ask Ausiello" column at TV Guide Online:

"Eric Dane — that's Jason Dean to all you 'Charmed' fans — has landed the pivotal role of Dr. Mark Sloan on 'Grey's Anatomy'. Mark is the creep who slept with Addison behind Derek's back. "

A few months back, I posited a theory that Dr. Greg House could have been the son of Dr. Mark Sloan of 'Diagnosis Murder'. (The fact that R. Lee Ermey eventually played the role wasn't a deterrent; House's mom could have slept around!)

I don't know how much we'll learn about this new Dr. Mark Sloan on 'Grey's Anatomy'; whether or not we'll learn of his parentage, background, etc. But I'm of the opinion that we shouldn't get worked up over him being the illegitimate son of Dick Van Dyke's character. I just don't see that as happening.

However, he could be a namesake. We know Dr. Sloan had a lot of relatives in the Sloan family tree (granted, a lot of them were bumped off in one episode). Surely one of them might have honored Mark Sloan with a child named after him, a cousin for Steve Sloan . And upon growing up, perhaps this new Mark Sloan decided to become a doctor as well.

But it doesn't sound as if he was quite as honorable as his predecessor.....

We shall see what we shall see.

BCnU!
Tele-Toby