JEDI-VISION

According to George Lucas, there will be a live-action TV series based on 'Star Wars' which will focus on minor characters from the basic mythology. It will be set in the time period between “Revenge of the Sith” (Episode III) and the original “Star Wars” (Episode IV). The action will follow the Rebel Alliance in its "infancy" against the Empire.. There will be Stormtroopers, but don't expect any Jedi - after all, until Luke came along, it was believed that Darth Vader was the last of that religion. And speaking of Darth Vader, he won't appear either.

As he did with the “Clone Wars” series, Lucas will write and shoot an entire year’s worth of episodes before looking for a cable channel on which to air the series, so it's going to be awhile before it finally enters Toobworld proper. (Of course, with appearances by 3PO and R2 in so many blipverts, it's already a part of the TV Universe.) Hopefully, the series will be cast mostly with unknown actors; it'll be more believable that way. By that I mean the actor won't be blocking our acceptance of the character.

Not that I think 'Star Wars' is real..... Heh heh.... ahem.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

DOUG ROSS, ACE OF LINKS

Here's what TV critic Mary McNamara had to say about some of the star power that was on display in Thursday night's episode of 'ER':

"It was as if none of his movie success ever happened. There was George Clooney, stunningly accessorized with scrubs, stethoscope and Julianna Margulies, looking for all the world as if he had never left the mother planet of 'ER. As if he and his alter ego Doug Ross had been simply living an alternate life in Seattle, raising the twins with Nurse Carol, no doubt doing a lot of volunteer work, waiting perhaps for John Wells to pull a Shonda Rhimes, send them to Malibu, give them their own spinoff show."

Well, he WAS living his life in Seattle; that's the whole point of Toobworld! Just because a show goes off the air, or a character leaves before the series has ended, that doesn't mean they enter some stasis chamber and remain frozen until needed again. In the thirty plus years between his last appearance on 'The Dick Van Dyke Show' and his guest appearance on an episode of 'Mad About You', Alan Brady led a full life on Earth Prime-Time, unseen by the audience in the Trueniverse. He probably changed networks, tried a movie career, revived his career with a few shows on Broadway, maybe even divorced Mel's sister.

And the same would hold true for Doug Ross. (We already know about his life before he was at County - he worked across town at another 'E/R' while he was studying to be a doctor. But of course back then he was still going by his college nickname of "Ace"....

BCnU!
Toby O'B

SMITHIE LESSON

James Corden is one of the brains behind 'Gavin & Stacey'. (Although from what I hear about his new sketch comedy show with castmate Matthew Horne, maybe Ruth Jones was in charge of that department.....) Not only did he co-write the series, but he played Gav's best mate, Smithie. And now with a third series gearing up, Smithie has added a new venue, which puts him two-thirds of the way towards qualifying for entry into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame.

In a sketch for the UK's Comic Relief telethon, Smithie is working on the pipes at a very posh hotel where he stumbles on a group meeting of England's football squad. Among those in attendance were Rion Ferdinand, John Terry, Frank Lampard, Peter Crouch, and Becks himself, David Beckham.When Smithie walked in on them, he couldn't help but take advantage of the situation and tell each of them where they were going wrong in their performance, and even how to properly perform "the Robot" after a goal.
The sketch may be available on YouTube, but I saw it on the Daily Mirror site. And a big thanks to Rob of "The Medium Is Not Enough" (link to the left, you lot!) for pointing me in the right direction....

BCnU!
Toby O'B

AS SEEN ON TV: CELEBUTARD APPRENTICE

To wrap up this week's mini-theme of "As Seen On TV" televersions from the latest 'Saturday Night Live', here's their fake promo for 'Celebrity Apprentice':

Guest host Dwayne Johnson is Dennis Rodman, Fred Armisen is Tom Green, and Darrell Hammond is that old gasbag himself, Donald Trump.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

LINK TO THE LEFT UPDATE

I've added a new link to the left, one that will fit in well with the sites dedicated to fictional cereals and "555" phone numbers.

It's called "Strange Maps" and that's what its caretaker is all about. ("I like maps. I like weird maps, the kind you won’t find in a regular atlas. Maps of countries that never existed - or never will exist.")

Someday, maybe even Toobworld could be represented there......

BCnU!
Toby O'B

SERIES PREMIERS

There was an episode of 'The Man From U.N.C.L.E.' entitled "The Jingle Bells Affair" which concerned the visit to America by Chairman Georgi Koz of an unnamed country similar to the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics. There was also an episode of 'Voyage To The Bottom Of The Sea' entitled "The Exile" which featured a man named Brynov, the recently ousted premier of a country that also sounds very similar to the Soviet Union.

Although the 'Voyage' episode aired before the 'U.N.C.L.E.' episode (March 15, 1965 vs December 23, 1966), "The Jingle Bells Affair" happened first on the Toobworld timeline. It took place just a few weeks before it aired - in the first scenes, the characters are held up in traffic by the Thanksgiving Day Parade. "The Exile", on the other hand, begins on October 3, 1974, as former Premier Brynov is about to be executed by firing squad.

It will be the Toobworld contention that Chairman Koz and Premier Brynov had been in charge of the same unnamed country.

As background, it could be that Brynov saw that the older Koz was turning soft after his experience in America. (At one point, Koz played the role of Santa Claus for the kids!) In fact, Chairman Koz foresaw that he would probably relieved of his duties once he got back home, especially because of a speech he gave at the U.N. Hoping to cover all of his bases, Koz asked Mr. Macy if he could be a department store Santa if he was out of a job.

So seizing his opportunity, the hard-liner Brynov probably had Koz ousted from power. Sadly - because Koz was an endearing character in his own way - Brynov probably had the Chairman executed.* What goes around, etc.: almost a decade later Brynov found himself in the same position. (Although he would survive the firing squad thanks to loyalists, he would later die at sea.)

As for what country they both ruled, we might as well seek out its identity in a third TV show, just to forge another link. In describing both Koz and Brynov, I said their country was similar to the USSR. So their fictional country should be a huge, sprawling collection of smaller countries and it should have a very utilitarian and generic name.

I think we have a candidate in The Federated People's Republic, from an episode of 'Mission: Impossible'. Further, here are a few choices for those republics under the FPR's control (at that time): Zemenia ('Monk'), Boravia ('Danger Man'), Drublegratz ('The Girl From 'U.N.C.L.E.'), Argonia ('The Adventures Of Superman'), Boldavia ('Night Court'), and maybe Tavilia from 'The Amazing Spiderman' (but that feels, to me, more like it should be close to Italy for some reason). I think all of those countries are now on their own; like the USSR, the FPR probably crumbled eventually.

As always, this theory cannot be proven or disproved. (Suddenly the voice of Bob Johnson is in my head. He's the voice we heard on those tapes and discs - the 1988 version - that Jim Phelps played each week......)

BCnU!
Toby O'B

*Then again, the holiday season in Toobworld is all about last-minute Christmas miracles!

ADDENDUM: BELATED BIG BRITISH BLIPVERT BRAINSTORM BRAVOS

I posted that previous story without giving full and proper credit to my blogmate across the water, Rob Buckley of "The Medium Is Not Enough" (link to the left). I pestered him several times over yesterday morning (using that old 'Columbo' mind-trick of "Just one more thing....") for help in identifying many of the characters in that Red Nose Day sketch about the advertising icons. I knew Monkey, and the Meerkat and the Martian - I guess I had an affinity for the M's - but I was really stuck on the 118 118 guys, the Admiral, and that disturbing Pepperami Meat-stick. (According to Rob, Adrian Edmondson - Vyvyan of 'The Young Ones' - provides its voice, and that so works for me!)

Ddiolch 'ch, Rob!

And my thanks also to Andrew, another Toobworld visitor I neglected to mention, who made sure that I knew that the sketch could be found online (since I won't be able to see it on the television over here).

Sorry I forgot to thank you guys earlier. Sometimes I really do need an editor to check my posts before I load them!

But then again, it gave me the chance to play with alliteration!

BCnU!

Toby O'B

THE BIG BRITISH BLIPVERT BRAINSTORM

Great Britain is over four hours into "Red Nose Day" for 2009, their annual Comic Relief celebration to raise money for charity. The theme this year is to do something funny for money, and it feels as though most British celebrities are pitching in to help out.

And this would include celebrities from Toobworld as well, including the icons and spokesmen to be found in commercials.
On February 20th, some of the greatest characters in British blipverts, some not seen on TV in decades, gathered together to think up a way they could help raise money for Comic Relief. I think I can safely say this will have a lock on the Toobits Award for Best Commercial Crossover in 2009!

Here's a rundown of who attended:












MONKEY - ITV Digital, PG Tips tea












HONEY MONSTER - Sugar Puffs












MARTIAN - Smash Instant Potatoes












THE MEAT-STICK - Pepperami








BRENDA & AUDREY - Bounty paper towels












CHURCHILL - Churchill Insurance












ALEXANDER THE MEERKAT - CompareTheMarket.com












BERTIE BASSETT - Liquorice Allsorts












THE ADMIRAL - Admiral Insurance












CAPTAIN BIRDSEYE - Birds Eye fish fingers












THE GORILLA - Cadbury












THE 118 118 GUYS - 118 Directory Assistance












MICHAEL WINNER - Kenco Coffee and Esure car insurance

There was also a voice-over at the end, of someone who didn't get the recognition he supposedly deserved for putting the whole meeting together, but it wasn't recognizable to me as to who it should be. Can anybody help with that information?

They finally decided, in the tradition of Band-Aid, to create a song that would help them raise money. And in the most angelic voice since Charlotte Church, Honey Monster sang out:

Don't buy fish fingers
Don't buy Kitchen Rolls
Don't buy Teabags
Don't buy Chocolate

And he implored those listening to instead buy shiny red noses to help raise money.

The Captain Birdseye seen in the sketch has to be considered some sort of recastaway, since the original actor, John Hewer, passed away a year ago come March 16. We can always claim it's his brother, also a Captain. (I'm wondering if there was some sort of poor taste joke - and there's nothing wrong with those! - to be implied in seeing him laid out like that until the Honey Monster's song brought him back to life, as it were?)

Later tonight there'll be a big telethon which will either augment the histories for 'Outnumbered' and 'The Sarah Jane Adventures', or give them counterparts in Skitlandia.

We shall see what we shall view.....

If you want to see their Red Nose Day sketch, click here.
BCnU!
Toby O'B

AS SEEN ON TV: SENATOR JOHN McCAIN

Today in the "As Seen On TV" spotlight, we have the former candidate for President, Senator John McCain. Like the last few televersions we've seen this week, this is how McCain looked on 'Saturday Night Live': In the sketch, he was ushered into the Oval Office along with fellow Republican Senators Hutchinson and Coburn to meet with President Barack Obama. But because of their resistance to his stimulus bill, the three senators angered the president so much that he transformed into "The Rock Obama". Not only was it the funniest sketch in a very strong night of good comedy sketches, it was one of the best in a long, long time.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

THE HAT SQUAD: JIMMY BOYD

Jimmy Boyd has passed away at the age of 70. But with his best known work, he'll forever be about twelve years old: Boyd sang the Christmas standard "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus". He also appeared in movies like the film version of "Inherit The Wind".

For Toobworld, he played Huckleberry Finn in two different productions and was a recurring character on 'Bachelor Father' as one of Kelly Gregg's boyfriends, Howard Meechim.

Contract on Cherry Street (1977) (TV) .... Gallagher, OCU

"Batman" .... Dogwood

- Louie the Lilac (1967)

"The Bing Crosby Show"
- Hoop Shots (1964)

"Broadside" (1964) .... Machinist's Mate Marioan Botnik

"My Three Sons"
- The Substitute Teacher

"Bob Hope Presents the Chrysler Theatre" .... Jerry

- The House Next Door (1963)

"Bachelor Father" .... Howard Meechim (1958-1962)

"Shirley Temple's Storybook" .... Alvin

- Emmy Lou (1960)

"Date with the Angels" .... Wheeler Angel(1957-1958)
"The United States Steel Hour" .... Huckleberry Finn

- The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1957)

- Tom Sawyer (1956)

"Space Patrol" .... Jimmy
- The Hidden Map (1952)

"Good night and may God bless....."

BCnU....
Toby O'B

THE HAT SQUAD: ANNA MANAHAN

Anna Manahan died at the age of 84 in Waterford, Ireland. Although she did a lot of television and a few movies, she was best known as a stage actress. Ms. Manahan played roles in the works of Ireland's greatest playwrights and some were even created for her, like "Big Maggie" by John B. Keane. Perhaps her most famous role was as Mag, the psychologically brutal old lady in "The Beauty Queen Of Leenane", for which she won the Tony Award in 1998.

"Fair City" .... Ursula Cruise (2004-200)

"The Clinic" .... Brendan's Nan (2004)

Black Day at Black Rock (2001) (TV) .... Mrs. Long

"Lovejoy" .... Irish Lil (1993)
- Swings and Roundabouts (1993)

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles" .... Old Woman at GPO
- Ireland, April 1916 (1993)

The Treaty (1991) (TV) .... Woman 2

"The Bill" .... Mrs. Kavanagh
- Grace of God (1989)

"Small World" .... Nosy neighbour
- April Is the Cruellest Month (1988)

"The Irish R.M." .... Mrs. Cadogan

The Country Girls (1984) (TV) .... Mrs. Burns

"Leave It to Mrs. O'Brien" (1984) .... Mrs. O'Brien

"ITV Playhouse"
- The Glory Hole (1982) .... Mary Higgins
- Lucky (1974) .... Mother

"The Ballyskillen Opera House" (1981) .... Theresa Halligan

A Tale of Two Cities (1980) (TV) .... The Vengeance

Juno and the Paycock (1980) (TV) .... Mrs. Madigan

"Play for Today" .... Maggie Donoghue
- Katie: The Year of a Child (1979) .... Maggie Donoghue

"Me Mammy" .... Mrs. Kennefick (1968-1971)

"Comedy Playhouse" .... Mrs. Kennefick
- Me Mammy (1968)

"Sanctuary" .... Mrs. O'Reilly
- Change of Heart (1968)

"Z Cars" .... Mrs. Boswell
- A Right to Live: Part 2 (1967)
- A Right to Live: Part 1 (1967)

"Theatre 625" .... Harriet Reilley
- Esther's Altar (1965)

"The Wednesday Play" .... Mrs. O'Brien
- The Man Without Papers (1965)

"ITV Play of the Week" .... Widow Quin
- Playboy of the Western World (1958)

I know she also worked on 'The Riordans' at some point in its run from 1965 to 1979, but the IMDb.com doesn't mention it.

Good night, and may God bless...

BCnU.....
Toby O'B

ONCE UPON A TOM....

It's difficult for me to watch TV like everybody else; I can't just let it wash over me for the mindless entertainment it was meant to be. My mind is always percolating, wondering what happens after the story ends, where do the characters go from that point on in their lives - even the ones who are just one-shot guest roles.

I've mentioned here in the last few days that I'm watching episodes of 'Cheyenne' via Netflix. And in one of them, "Julesburg", we got to meet a young boy named Tommy Scott. During a cattle stampede, his older brother and guardian was killed; by the end of the episode, Tommy was basically adopted by townsfolk Virgil and Jeremy Barnes. (Not pioneers in that sense - "Jeremy" happened to be the wife's name.) Cheyenne said that they'd get in touch with Tommy's relatives, but the boy hoped they'd never show up to claim him. So I couldn't help wonder how Tommy Scott turned out in his Toobworld life. Was he adopted by Mr. and Mrs. Barnes and take their name? Did he remain a Scott? What did he do in Colorado once he grew up?

There was a scene in the first half of the episode where Tommy first met Jeremy Barnes, and she showed him how a typewriter worked. He seemed fascinated by its pozz'bilities, so if I was crafting a life for him, I'd follow that line - make him a frontier newspaperman or a writer along the same lines as Mark Twain.

I checked the IMDb.com for the variations on "Tommy Scott" and did find a "Tom Scott" in an episode of 'The Lone Ranger'. I couldn't find any more information about "Desperado at Large", other than it was about a lynch mob out to hang an undercover agent. I have no idea what kind of man that Tom Scott was, so I don't know whether I'd want him to be Tommy grown up or not.

But it was also a 'Lone Ranger' episode which starred John Hart as the Masked Man. In Toobworld's mythos, Clayton Moore played the actual Lone Ranger; John Hart's episodes are from the TV show based on his life that was watched by the citizenry of Toobworld. (This splains the appearances by John Hart as the Lone Ranger in various episodes of 1980's TV, like 'Happy Days' and 'The Fall Guy'.) So if it was supposed to be the same Tommy Scott, it was an actor playing the grown-up Tommy on a Toobworld TV show.

Confused? I have that effect sometimes.....

BCnU!
Toby O'B

SCHIFF-Y TOOB

Okay, I said I'd refrain from commenting on proposed pilots, but when news of casting on this one was announced, I couldn't resist:

FOX is prepping a pilot for Richard Schiff to play a legendary expert in the field of reincarnation (which does exist in Toobworld). 'The Reincarnationist' is about investigators solving present day mysteries caused by past-life traumas.

Uh huh.

Please let there at least be an in-joke appearance by the one and only 1928 Porter touring car! BCnU!
Toby O'B

AS SEEN ON TV: MICHAEL STEELE

Continuing our showcase of the televersions from this past week's 'Saturday Night Live', the "As Seen On TV" spotlight is on Michael Steele, the G.O.P. chairman who appeared on "Weekend Update". Mr. Steele had been outfitted with an electrode installed into his brain by the minions of the real party boss, Rush Limbaugh. And every time Steele said something contrary to what that gasbag believed, he was given an electric shock.Remember, Kiddies: Rush Limbaugh IS the GOP: Garrulous Oxycontin Partaker.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

SUMMER OF MY DISCONTENT

Long-time visitors to this site know how I feel when a TV show mentions another TV show AS a TV show. That's a "Zonk", a discrepancy in the concept that all TV shows should be sharing the same TV Universe. Sure, we have 'Sliders' to provide the template for alternate TV dimensions (although the basic idea existed long before 'Sliders' came along, thanks to shows like 'Star Trek'). But the dream is for them all to co-exist.

On Monday night, the four uber-nerds of 'The Big Bang Theory' took a train from Pasadena to San Francisco to attend a conference, and most of them became spazmodos once they realized that actress Summer Glau was riding in the same car with them (at least to Santa Barbara). For genre fans, Summer is currently starring in 'Terminator: The Sarah Conner Chronicles' and has also been in 'Firefly', its sequel movie "Serenity", and 'The 4400'.

Raj, Howard, and Leonard all took a shot at chatting her up, with only Raj even coming close to keeping her interested - at least until he found that he was "buzzed" on near-beer. And several times during their various conversations with Ms. Glau, her work in both 'Firefly' and 'The Sarah Conner Chronicles' came up. But even those Zonks paled before the biggie tossed off by Sheldon - who wasn't even i the running to talk to Summer!

"If Skynet actually did exist in the Future, a perfect way to infiltrate and destroy all of Mankind would be to send Terminators back, posing as actors who have played Terminators in popular films and television series; lulling us into a false sense of security - i.e.: 'That's Summer Glau from "The Sarah Conner Chronicles"! No, Summer! Don't kill me! I'm pro-robot!' Pow! Aaaaack!"

Sure, it was a major blow to the unified Toobworld concept, but man, was he funny with the delivery!

When the series first started, I dealt with the problem of Terminator Zonks, but those were all about the earlier movies, usually just the first one, mentioned in TV shows that were broadcast before 'The Sarah Conner Chronicles' debuted. Now we had a TV sitcom making jokes about the 'T:TSCC' series itself. Add to that Raj's reference to 'Firefly' and how Summer - as River Tam - once traveled the stars on that show, and the entire episode was one big Zonkfest.

Toobworld Central had already established that the basic series of 'Firefly' was off in the alternate TV dimension for the revamped 'Battlestar Galactica' because the Serenity - or some other Firefly-class spaceship was seen in that show's pilot episode. But it looks like I'll have to dump 'The Sarah Conner Chronicles' as well now after that Summer Squee.

Probably just as well. The 'Terminator' movies, with a new one coming soon, are such a pop culture touchstone now, there will always be Zonks about them. I'm sure 'The Big Bang Theory' will still deliver its onw fair share of Zonks in episodes to come, but hopefully we'll be able to find a way to disable them. (It'll be easy enough if they stick to just mentioning 'Star Trek' and 'Star Wars'.)
One added item of interest - if you check out the preview clip at either CBS.com or at Hulu.com, you'll see Sheldon's Skynet speech reworked with added SFX to later scenes of Summer Glau dealing with the other guys. It's pretty funny if low-tech.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

MAKING BOOK ON "CASTLE"

Depending on how successful 'Castle' turns out to be for ABC, the bookshelves of Toobworld could be groaning under the weight of the tomes written by Richard Castle, a detective fiction writer called by his publisher (and ex-wife) "The Master Of The Macabre". Maybe there won't be as many books as written by Jessica B. Fletcher of 'Murder, She Wrote', but certainly more than we ever discovered to be written by Maxwell Beckett in the series 'Over My Dead Body'.

Here are the books by Rick Castle that were mentioned in the series debut:

From the Derek Storm series of novels:
Storm Fall
Storm's Break
Gathering Storm

Three books that were considered some of his lesser works:
Death Of A Prom Queen
Flowers For Your Grave
Hell Hath No Fury

And two more which were seen on a bookshelf:
A Skull At Springtime
A Rose For Everafter

Not a bad start for the show's contribution to TV trivia.

I'm not sure I heard Castle's ex-wife correctly, but I think she said the name of the publishing company was "Black Pond". If that's correct, maybe its owner took the name from Black Pond in Connecticut. Also, it makes for a nice rival to Whitestone Publishing from 'Dream On'. And since the world of 'Lost' should be influencing all of Toobworld (and not just with the Numbers), then that rivalry between the two publishing houses could be added to the black/white thematic.

I wonder if Kate Beckett, the detective working with Rick Castle, has any English relations? If she was related to Maxwell Beckett and had a falling out with her English kinsman, maybe that could be a reason why she's so cool to Castle......

Just sayin', is all.....

BCnU!
Toby O'B

"CASTLE" KEEPERS

Monday night was a great night for the League of Themselves: Summer Glau rode the train with the four "squints" of 'The Big Bang Theory', and in the premiere of 'Castle', "Master of the Macabre" Rick Castle played poker with fellow scribes James Patterson and Stephen J. Cannell.

Both authors could have been major Zonks for Toobworld. But luckily Patterson only mentioned his character of Alex Cross who was played by Morgan Freeman in two theatrically-released movies. What could have happened was that he might have mentioned the series of books about 'The Women's Murder Club', which was also a series on ABC like 'Castle'.

It wouldn't have been an insurmountable Zonk - we could have claimed that he wrote fictionalized versions of their exploits, true crime novels a la Capote's "In Cold Blood". But it's nice to just avoid that headache altogether.

As for Cannell, I found it hard to pick up exactly which of his characters he was talking about (even with repeated listens), but I think it may have been Shane Scully. It could have been any one of his numerous TV productions that he mentioned instead, so that kept me from being inundated from de-Zonking chores.

Stephen J. Cannell also provided several links to other shows for 'Castle' in his role as a member of the League of Themselves. He's appeared as his own televersion in the shows 'Tenspeed And Brown Shoe' ("This One's Gonna Kill Ya") and 'V.I.P.' ("Get Vallery"). So with three series under his belt, Cannell is eligible for membership one day in the TV Crossover Hall of Fame.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

AS SEEN ON TV: JAMIE LEE CURTIS

I think we'll close out the rest of the week with the surplus of televersions from this past week's edition of 'Saturday Night Live', which was hosted by Dwayne Johnson.

So, for our "As Seen On TV" showcase for Wednesday, we have Jamie Lee Curtis as she films another blipvert for Activia yogurt... and once again poops the couch.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

BORN TO RE-RUN: A BURNING SOUL

We're back at the Denbrow (I've also seen it spelled Dembro at the IMDb.com) ranch for a "Born To Re-Run" suggestion. Sheila Denbrow was 19 when she married widowed rancher John Denbrow and became step-mother to his daughter "Johnnie". But a few years of this hard life became too much for her, and she looked for any chance of escape - even if it was a fleeting afternoon of passion with some passing drifter or one of the hired cowhands. (That's the impression I got anyway; I don't think 'Cheyenne' was her first attempt to cheat on her husband. But Cheyenne was probably the first to refuse her advances.)

Sheila's desire for Cheyenne was also fueled by her realization that Johnnie had grown up to be a beautiful 17 year old and that she was a rival for the attentions of Cheyenne Bodie. Her unrequited lust, long-simmering anger at her situation, and insecurities about her aging looks led her to a very dark place in her mind. And so, on a night of celebration when her husband passed out drunk in the carriage inside the barn and she accidentally tipped over the lantern, setting the hay ablaze, Sheila Denbrow made the decision to leave John in there to his doom.
As time passed, the guilt became overwhelming; she became fixated on flames and kept hearing the screams of the horses. (Even though they survived, their cries became a substitute for those her husband could never utter.) Sheila Denbrow developed what Barney Stinson would say was a bad case of "crazy eyes", and she finally died when she was run down by the horse of rival rancher Martin Storm, who was trying to drag-lynch Cheyenne.
It's the contention of Toobworld Central that her soul was eventually reincarnated as Nora Chandler, a famous actress from the 1950's. Although she had no conscious remembrance of the events in that past life, it now became easier to accomplish the same results as Sheila did.
First, she murdered her husband; then years later, she killed her assistant, the only other person who knew what she did. (Although not stated in the 'Columbo' episode "Requiem For A Falling Star", I believe Nora's assistant was the young woman who had been having the affair with Nora's husband when they were discovered by the actress.)

And how did Nora kill her assistant? By setting fire to her car while she was in it.
Like I said, past life experience made it easier to do such heinous acts.

At least, that's my theory......

BCnU!
Toby O'B

HART LINE

In "The Storm Riders", 'Cheyenne' Bodie worked as a ranch hand for John Denbrow, his second wife Sheila, and his daughter Johnnie. There was an attraction between Cheyenne and 17 year old Johnnie; he even offered to stay on for a while longer, perhaps entertaining the idea that something might come of their interest in each other. But Johnnie sent him on his way - she knew he wasn't the type to be held down to any one place for very long. And besides, she felt ready to stand on her own as an adult, now that her father had died.

So Cheyenne Bodie wouldn't figure into the family tree of Johnnie Denbrow, but it's the Toobworld theory of Relateeveety that eventually she did marry and have children. And one of her grandsons would grow up to become a police detective in the Los Angeles homicide division.

If the theory is viable, in a world where genetic echoes are especially strong in succeeding generations, that grandson would be Sgt. Lester Hart, as seen on 'Burke's Law'.....

BCnU!
Toby O'B

MAGGIE MAY... SOONER THAN LATER

The BBC has commissioned a sitcom centered around a trade unionist (I'm not sure, but I picture the type of characters found in "I'm Alright, Jack".) who moves to a small, conservative village in County Durham. The press release says that other characters in the show would be a wealthy womanizer, a man-child and his battle-axe of a mother, a techno-wizard and an insane survivalist.

Usually I hold off on talking about pilots and proposed series until they actually air - why bother, if they're not going to be part of Toobworld in the end? But there was one intriguing item in the story: depending on when it is finally aired, it will be set in the future.

As a general rule, episodes of TV shows take place around the same time that they're first aired, unless they were definitely set in the Past or the Future. But even though the first episode is timed to coincide with the 25th anniversary of the miners' strike, it will kick off (litterally) with the death of Margaret Thatcher.

Like I said, the location of 'Silver Acres' on the Toobworld timeline depends on when it airs. The "Iron Butterfly" is still alive, (although in poor health mentally, I'm led to believe), so if it airs before she passes away, then it will be in the future on first airing. Not that I'm wishing it, but Mrs. Thatcher could join the Choir Invisible tomorrow; and then 'Silver Acres' would be set in the past.

I'll have to keep a lazy eye on this one......

[Pictured: Lindsay Duncan as Margaret Thatcher]

BCnU!
Toby O'B

THINKING TOOBALLY

I always enjoy reading TV reviewers and columnists who write in a Toobworld frame of mind, even if they don't realize it. And today I came across two examples which brought a smile.

First up is Keith McDuffie in his Clique Claque TV article about the Vikings in those Capital One commercials. (When they were dealing with just credit cards, I called them Visa-Goths.)

McDuffie offers his vision of a Geico Cavemen-styled sitcom for the berserkers:

"Here’s a possible premise for you: the largest credit card company in the world, Uppercase Two, is losing money. In order to fix the situation, the company’s CEO — who’s actually the Viking god Loki — calls upon the god Odin for help “like the old days.” To both help and punish Loki, Odin sends him one-hundred Viking warriors from the ninth century. Hilarity ensues!"

There have been worse premises.....

And then Nicholas Fonseca, writing for Entertainment Weekly, had a crossover moment while puzzling over the series finale for 'The L Word':

"As series finales go, this one was a head-scratcher. The tone felt heavy and ominous, and all that moody music was making me wonder when The Log Lady and The Man From Another Place would come sashaying through a scene."

BCnU!
Toby O'B

AS SEEN ON TV: ANANIAS DARE

Recently I recorded the Sci-Fi movie "Wraiths Of Roanoke" (but broadcast on the Chiller network) so that's why today's "As Seen On TV" is Roanoke settler Ananias Dare, as played by Adrian Paul: I think in most general history books, Ananias Dare comes off as nothing more than the father of Virginia Dare, the first child of European parents to be born in the New World (08/18/1587), and the son-in-law of Roanoke Governor White. He probably comes across as the most irrelevant father in history since Joseph.

But for Toobworld, he's a tragic hero, sacrificing himself to not only save his daughter, but to make the New World safe for future colonists.

THE DARE FAMILY

Ananias, Elizabeth, and daughter Virginia

BCnU!
Toby O'B

TVXOHOF, 03/2009-B: JOHN PAUL II

Since we're in the middle of the Lenten season, I thought the historical figure that we should induct into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame for March should be Pope John Paul II. And the best part is that if we only concentrate on just the televersion of John Paul as played by Gene Greytak, we have one of the most important "linkers" ever to enter the Hall.

Just check out this list of credits:

'Alf' (a dream sequence of the 'Tonight' show)
'Ally McBeal'
'Golden Girls'
'Picket Fences'
'The Wayans Brothers'
'Night Court'
'Just The Ten Of Us'
'Murphy Brown'
'Cybil'
'Everybody Loves Raymond'
'The Father Dowling Mysteries'
(Although I'm not sure he appeared in the actual show, or else just a promo blipvert for it. But either way, such promos are considered part of Toobworld, or at the very least one of its alternate versions.)

Gene Greytak is also Pope John Paul II in Skitlandia, uniting such shows as:

'Geraldo'
'Tonight'
'The Arsinio Hall Show'
'In Living Color'
'The Phil Donahue Show'
'Comic Relief'
'Philly After Midnight'

And although Mr. Greytak played the part in several movies, the most important one would be "Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult", which was a continuation of 'Police Squad'

He can also be seen in commecials for:

American Savings Bank
Arec Athletic Training Equipment Co.
Swedish Coffee

With a resume like that, you can see why Gene Greytak as the Pope deserves the honor. He will also serve as the official portrait of the Pope for Toobworld.

And this list would not have been possible without the help of fellow Crossoverite RAF, and from Hugh......

Thanks guys!

BCnU!
Toby O'B

AS SEEN ON TV: KING JOHN

For the last entry in our "As Seen On TV" mini-theme of historical characters from the 'Time Tunnel' episode "The Revenge Of Robin Hood", we have King John:
As I suggested with the casting of Donald Harron as the Earl of Huntington, perhaps John Crawford was cast based on his slight resemblance to the look sported by Claude Rains in the movie "The Adventures Of Robin Hood". (Maybe they were planning on using stock footage from that for far-away shots?)

I went into great detail yesterday about the various versions of the Robin Hood legend on TV, but there are a few I want to mention in connection with this portrayal.

First off, with the official version of Robin Hood being the 1950's series starring Richard Greene, there were three actors who played John, the most famous being Donald Pleasance. (I don't have access to my copy of his picture as John at the moment, I'll have to add it in later....) So far, I haven't found pictures of the other two actors in the role, but it's likely that two - if not all three! - were imposters, perhaps quantum leapers assuming the glamour of Prince/King John. Saying it was all three certainly removes the need to splain away the differences in appearance with any other portrayal.

The events at Runnymeade in 1215 were also depicted in "Time Out For Martin", an episode of 'My Favorite Martian'. Unfortunately I only have that episode on videotape, and AOL Video no longer offers the series - at least not free. I should have it in a few days though via Netflix. So I can't offer a splainin just yet. (I may be learning my lesson about splainin blind!)

I haven't seen the Fifth Doctor's story of "The King's Demons" from 'Doctor Who', but the Doctor Who Reference Guide offers a very detailed summary of what happened in that story. It also takes place in 1215 around the same time, but far from Runnymeade, and yet King John shows up in it.

Actually it's not King John but an android named Kamelion who can assume the shape of others. So we can splain away this recastaway by saying that Kamelion didn't capture the exact likeness of King John.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

MILLER'S SON'S TALE

John Harmon was one of those character actors you saw all the time and probably never knew his name. In "The Storm Riders", an episode of 'Cheyenne', he played Miller the shopkeeper:
Miller was a weaselly little snit who couldn't wait to tell Storm's hired gun Swallow that Cheyenne was riding into town and looking for him. And later,even though he claimed that he had nothing personal against Cheyenne, he was the second loudest voice calling for the cowboy to be lynched (after Mr. Storm, that is).

As it is with a lot of supporting TV characters in one-shot appearances, we didn't learn anything of Miller's background, whether or not he had a family, for example. But I'm thinking that he did have a wife and at least one child, a son. And if so, then it's my contention that Miller's son grew up and moved back East to New York, where he fell on hard times when the Great Depression hit (as seen in the 'Star Trek' episode "City On The Edge Of Forever").
And as he scrabbled for his existence in Manhattan, Miller Junior was known by the other down-and-outers as "Rodent" - probably the personality quirks of the weaselly father rubbed off on the son.

For Toobworld, "Rodent Miller" is a fascinating character when it comes to the chronology for Earth Prime-Time. In the original 'Star Trek' timeline, "Rodent" stole a phaser and tried it out, which caused his disintegration. Behind the scenes, this was eliminated from the restored and enhanced version which can be seen in syndication today. Those in charge of the restoration realized that such an action would only cause problems with the timeline if Rodent's future actions were erased.

(Within the "reality" of Toobworld, the enhanced series of 'Star Trek' is due to Nick Cutter, who somehow changed the entire history of Earth Prime-Time while in the 'Primeval' past.)

Like all my theories of "Relateeveety", the father-son relationship between Miller and "Rodent" can't be proven. But like I always say, it can't be disproved either.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

UPDATE ON "CHEYENNE: A LUST STORY"

In the blog post "Cheyenne: A Lust Story", I wrote the following:

In the 'Cheyenne' episode of "War Party", Cheyenne Bodie found himself attracted to the wife of a man he had shot in self-defense. Her name was Jeannie, and she felt the pull as well, offering herself to him willingly.

Cheyenne backed off at the last moment; however, he admitted that he wasn't strong enough (morally) to do so. It was just the thought that her husband, Morgan, was lying in the next room, a man he shot, that kept him from taking her.

Earlier on Sunday I watched the 'Cheyenne' episode "The Storm Riders", in which Mrs. Sheila Denbrow tried to give herself to Cheyenne, but he wouldn't have anything to do with her.

Mrs. Denbrow:
"What are you, a saint?"
Cheyenne Bodie:
"Far from it."

It was just that in this case, there was just something patently offensive about Mrs. Denbrow, which her husband couldn't see. But it still could be inferred from Cheyenne's response that he wasn't above enjoying the favors offered by lonely wives across the frontier. And if so, there's a good chance a lot of TV characters farther down the TV timeline could claim Cheyenne Bodie as an ancestor - if only it was acknowledged by the family.... And under the circumstances, that's not very likely.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

CAPTION KLUTZ

Toobworlder Andy was watching the fourth episode of 'Lie To Me' and noticed that the caption onscreen made the same mistake that an episode of 'Chuck' made earlier in the season:
As I stated earlier regarding that opening title card for "Wraiths Of Roanoke", onscreen captions - for the most part - have no effect on what happens in Toobworld. So the country of Colombia is still spelled that way, despite what the illiterate captioneers would have you believe....

Thanks for catching that, Andy!

BCnU!
Toby O'B

THAT BILKO BEAT

With the passing of Charlie Chaplin's son, Sydney Chaplin, I thought it might be interesting to spotlight an appearance he made as himself in Toobworld. On January 23, 1959, CBS broadcast "Keep In Step", a special which can be considered a musical episode of 'You'll Never Get Rich' (AKA 'The Phil Silvers Show', AKA 'Bilko').

Sgt. Bilko found out that Chaplin was in military service and it gave him an idea on how to make some money. He persuaded Chaplin to write up Bilko's life story, with the intention of getting Cary Grant to play the lead. (Schyeah, Bilko and Grant could pass for twins....) However, another actor is available for the role - some comic schlub named Phil Silvers!

Another member of the League of Themselves who appeared in the special was the British sex siren Diana Dors, during an audition scene in Hollywood.

So this extended 'Bilko' episode can join a select club in which TV characters actually met the actors who portrayed them. Others in that group would include episodes of 'Mork & Mindy', 'Moesha', and 'Here's Lucy'.

I looked around for some video or screen capture of Chaplin with Bilko, or of Bilko with Silvers, but all I found was an extended clip from the beginning of the episode as the motor squad rehearses while Bilko faces the music from the Colonel.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

ROANOKE: A MOVING EXPERIENCE

The geography of Toobworld is pretty screwed up in comparison to that of the real world. For a good example, think of all those vest-pocket kingdoms that have to be squeezed into the map of Europe, thanks to shows like 'Mission: Impossible' and 'Man From U.N.C.L.E.'. What the Toobworld map doesn't need then is a mangling of previously established locations which we have in the real world. But luckily these problems occur in onscreen graphics which are not visible to the citizenry of Toobworld. (For the most part - the graphics in that VW commercial are not only visible, but they break apart when the car drives through them.)

This season saw the country of Colombia identified as "Columbia" in two different series. And now a TV movie, "Wraiths Of Roanoke", wants to move the island of Roanoke away from its location off the coast of North Carolina:
Online graphics like that could be seen as the voice of some serlinguistic deity, some cosmic power from Toobworld, addressing the audience viewing at home in the Trueniverse. But if so, he's certainly not infallible.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

THE NEWS: BLACK & WHITE & RED-NOSED ALL OVER

In the United Kingdom, the charity fund-raiser Comic Relief began in 1988 and every year seems to culminate with Red Nose Day. And the BBC has put out this press release for a special TV crossover in connection with the event, coming up on Friday, March 13:

In a first for BBC Three, the cast of 'Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps' are joined by the casts of 'Coming Of Age' and 'Grown Ups' in a special episode for Comic Relief.

Tim, the bartender of The Archer, arranges Timothy Claypole's Comic Relief Night Of Fun – a pub quiz with a twist.

Split into three teams, the guys and girls battle it out in three categories, starting with the "bitch off", which literally ends in tears as Gaz takes it too far and DK takes it personally. Next is the "drink off" in which Grant, Donna and Matt head for the bar to see who can down a pint of lager the fastest.

The final category is the "flirt off" and Gaz is in his element. Jas joins Michelle and Janet (both played by Sheridan Smith), who do their best to seduce Gaz into giving them the highest score for their flirting abilities. As Michelle and Janet try their best lines, Jas shows that, where Gaz is concerned, the direct approach works best.

As a special treat for Comic Relief the episode ends with a song – Stop Thinking, Start Drinking – featuring an unmissable rapping duet from DK and Gaz.

This Comic Relief special is co-written by Susan Nickson ('Two Pints Of Lager' and 'Grown Ups') and Tim Dawson ('Coming Of Age').

I'm not sure how this is going to be played out. When there was a crossover between 'Doctor Who' and 'EastEnders' ('Dimenstions in Time'), I felt comfortable with including that in Toobworld proper. But this could turn out to be the representation of all these established characters in the dimension of Skitlandia.

That's going to be a pretty neat trick seeing Sheridan Smith playing both Janet and Michelle; it'll be reminiscent of Lisa Kudrow playing Phoebe on 'Friends' and Ursula on 'Mad About You' and their occasional meetings on 'Friends'.

Hopefully video of this will surface on YouTube, or at the very least there will be news photos of this 3-way coming over the wire. Somehow I'll find a way to grab something to share with the visitors to Toobworld.

And for this bit o' news, which may turn out to be the Crossover of the Year, Toobworld Central is giving really big thanks to Andrew Brook for letting me know about it.

BCnU!
Toby O'B

AS SEEN ON TV: FRIAR TUCK AND LITTLE JOHN

I think I mentioned yesterday that I was going to deal with King John today, "As Seen On TV" in that 'Time Tunnel' episode of "Revenge Of Robin Hood". But I still have some more research to do on that so I'll put it off until tomorrow.

Instead, we have two other characters from that episode, figures more closely associated with legend than history: Little John and Friar Tuck. Since they made contact with Doug and Tony, who also interacted with King John - and we know he actually existed - then these two "Merry Men" must also be accredited as being historically real.

Even more so than Robin Hood, the physical differences between various portrayals of Tuck and Little John are harder to splain away. At least Friar Tuck has a look from which there is usually little deviation. We can always attribute facial differences to degrees of hardship from living in Sherwood Forest. It's more difficult with the recastaways of Little John and would have to be dealt with on a case by case basis.

But we can cut away some of the many televersions of these two Merry Men by packing them off to alternate dimensions.

First off, any TV movies or mini-series of the Robin Hood legend - like "Robin of Locksley", "Young Ivanhoe", and "The Zany Adventures Of Robin Hood" - can be automatically dispatched; portrayals as seen in episodes of TV shows in which they interact with established TV characters should always have precedence.

'When Things Were Rotten' - Mel Brooks' first treatment of the tale should be relegated to that TV dimension in which we'd also find 'That's My Bush!' and 'The Secret Files Of Desmond Pfeiffer'.

The latest version of 'Robin Hood' has a black Friar Tuck, so perhaps that series should find refuge in the TV dimension in which other established characters were also black - like the black version of 'The Odd Couple'.

With 'Voyagers!', since they're deliberately altering the timeline, it's the Toobworld contention that Phineas and Jeffrey are always visiting alternate dimensions, so recastaways are never a problem. Meanwhile, the 1975 mini-series has a gravitas that makes it feel perfect for 'The West Wing' dimension.

The only series that would cause a problem for these televersions of Friar Tuck and Little John would be the official series of Earth Prime-Time, 'The Adventures Of Robin Hood'. And those are the two who are also seen in this post........

A possible Toobworld splainin? The Little John from that 1950's series is the father of the one who tagged along with the Earl of Huntington in that episode of 'The Time Tunnel'. And Friar Tuck was a younger man in that original series, having aged by the time Doug and Tony met him.

Works for me.

BCnU!
Toby O'B