AS SEEN ON TV: TIM TEBOW

For the last "As Seen On TV" spotlight of the year, I'm dedicating this one to my brother Tim, who's a big Broncos fan....

TIM TEBOW

AS SEEN ON:
'Saturday Night Live'

AS PLAYED BY:
Taran Killam

TV DIMENSION:
Skitlandia

From Wikipedia:
Timothy Richard "Tim" Tebow (born August 14, 1987) is an American football player who is currently the starting quarterback for the Denver Broncos of the National Football League (NFL). He was drafted by the Broncos as the 25th overall pick in the 2010 NFL Draft and played college football at Florida.

Tebow played quarterback for Nease High School in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida and was ranked among the top quarterback prospects in the nation as a high school senior. He ultimately chose to attend the University of Florida. As a backup to starter Chris Leak and a key situational contributor, Tebow helped the Gators win the national championship during the 2006 college football season. Tebow was the Gators' starting quarterback during the 2007 season and became the first college football player to both rush and pass for 20 or more touchdowns in a single season. Consequently, he became the first college sophomore to win the Heisman Trophy. In 2008, Tebow led Florida to a 13-1 record and its second national championship in three years, and was named the offensive MVP of the national championship game. The Gators again went 13-1 and finished with a top- ranking in 2009, Tebow's senior year.

Tebow was selected in the 1st round of the 2010 NFL draft by the Denver Broncos. He started the last three games of his rookie season and became the Broncos' full-time starting QB beginning in the 6th game of 2011. His team was 1-4 before Tebow began playing regularly, but immediately began winning with him on the field, often by coming from behind late in the 4th quarter.

Tebow is known as a dual threat quarterback, adept at both rushing and passing the football. At the conclusion of his college career, he held the Southeastern Conference's all-time records in both career passing efficiency and total rushing touchdowns, appearing second and tenth (respectively) in the NCAA record book in these categories. With his unorthodox NFL QB skillset, frequent expressions of religion, and ability to help his team win, Tebow has attracted unprecedented praise, criticism, and attention from the sporting media and beyond. Commenting on Tebow's play and the attention he has garnered, many football players and observers have said that they "have never seen anything like it."

BCnU!

THE FLEETS ARE IN!

"Hi. My name is Larry.

This is my brother Darryl. And this is my other brother Darryl."

Larry

'Newhart'

One other point of interest from that "Mayberry Band" episode of 'The Andy Griffith Show' which I wrote about yesterday - Joseph Sirola was one of the guest stars playing a traveling musician named Freddy Fleet. By the way Andy and Barney greeted him when his band arrived in town, they had met before.

Bobby Fleet One

The Mayberry wikia would have you accept that Freddy Fleet was the same guy named Bobby Fleet who made two previous visits to Mayberry - in "The Guitar Player" (played by Henry Slate) and in "The Guitar Player Returns" (played by Herb Ellis). And they're only doing it because that's what the show wanted you to think. (Who had any idea back then that there would be DVDs and all-day marathons on TV Land?)

But as you might expect from a recastaway situation, none of them looked alike; and of course there's that matter of Sirola's Fleet having a different first name.

Freddy Fleet

Because of that quote at the top of the page, you may have already figured out where I'm going with this. As was the case of Larry, Darryl, and Darryl, these three Fleets were all brothers. And two of them had the same first name.

This situation isn't limited just to these two sitcoms. Over in the Wold Newton Universe, there are thee James Moriarty's to splain away certain discrepancies. I believe there are three Captain Nemo's as well for the same reason.

It could be that since the first two brothers are known as "Bobby", only one of them has "Robert" as his Christian name. The other could be "Robin", "Robinson", or even "Bobbitt".

Bobby Fleet Two

If this theory works, then the second Bobby took over "Bobby Fleet And The Band With The Beat" - probably because something happened to his older brother. And when Freddy showed up in Mayberry (and not for the first time, based on the dialogue), he may have taken over the band from Bobby Two. But I prefer to think that since we didn't see Jim Lindsey with the band, and the name of the band was not printed on the side of the "bus", then Freddy had started his own band.

And to splain away the Zonk of the characters greeting the second Bobby as though he had been there for that first episode, it could be chalked up to a matter of confusion - a mental lapse. We all get them. ("I could have sworn it was you who....")

And Bobby Two was too polite to correct them.

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: RUDYARD KIPLING

RUDYARD KIPLING

AS SEEN IN:
'The Time Tunnel'

AS PLAYED BY:
David Watson

TV DIMENSION:
Not Determined

STATUS:
Recastaway

From Wikipedia:
Joseph Rudyard Kipling (30 December 1865 – 18 January 1936) was an English poet, short-story writer, and novelist chiefly remembered for his celebration of British imperialism, tales and poems of British soldiers in India, and his tales for children. Kipling received the 1907 Nobel Prize for Literature. He was born in Bombay, in the Bombay Presidency of British India, and was taken by his family to England when he was five years old. Kipling is best known for his works of fiction, including The Jungle Book (a collection of stories which includes "Rikki-Tikki-Tavi"), Just So Stories (1902) (1894), Kim (1901) (a tale of adventure), many short stories, including "The Man Who Would Be King" (1888); and his poems, including Mandalay (1890), Gunga Din (1890), The White Man's Burden (1899) and If— (1910). He is regarded as a major "innovator in the art of the short story"; his children's books are enduring classics of children's literature; and his best works are said to exhibit "a versatile and luminous narrative gift".

The Civil and Military Gazette in Lahore, the newspaper which Kipling was to call "mistress and most true love," appeared six days a week throughout the year except for a one-day break each for Christmas and Easter. Kipling was worked hard by editor Stephen Wheeler, but Kipling's need to write was unstoppable. In 1886 he published his first collection of verse, Departmental Ditties. That year also brought a change of editors at the newspaper; Kay Robinson, the new editor, allowed more creative freedom and Kipling was asked to contribute short stories to the newspaper.

During the summer of 1883, Kipling visited Shimla (then known as Simla), a well-known hill station and summer capital of British India. By then it was established practice for the Viceroy of India and the government to move to Simla for six months and the town became a "centre of power as well as pleasure." Kipling's family became yearly visitors to Simla and Lockwood Kipling was asked to serve in the Christ Church there.

Rudyard Kipling returned to Simla for his annual leave each year from 1885 to 1888, and the town figured prominently in many of the stories that he wrote for the Gazette. He describes this time: "My month’s leave at Simla, or whatever Hill Station my people went to, was pure joy—every golden hour counted. It began in heat and discomfort, by rail and road. It ended in the cool evening, with a wood fire in one’s bedroom, and next morn—thirty more of them ahead!—the early cup of tea, the Mother who brought it in, and the long talks of us all together again. One had leisure to work, too, at whatever play-work was in one’s head, and that was usually full."

Back in Lahore, some thirty-nine stories appeared in the Gazette between November 1886 and June 1887. Most of these stories were included in Plain Tales from the Hills, Kipling's first prose collection, which was published in Calcutta in January 1888, a month after his 22nd birthday. Kipling's time in Lahore, however, had come to an end. In November 1887 he was transferred to the Gazette's much larger sister newspaper, The Pioneer, in Allahabad in the United Provinces.

It was in 1886 when Kipling met time travelers Tony Newman and Doug Philips. I'm still not certain whether or not Tony and Doug were also crossing over into parallel time-lines, which could splain away why the historical figures they met looked different from other portrayals in various TV programs.

Today would have been his 146th birthday.....

BCnU!

ANDY TAYLOR - MAYBERRY MALFEASANT

J'ACCUSE!

Here's a little item that caught my eye while home for Christmas......

If you google "Sheriff Commits Fraud", you'll find plenty of news stories archived where the town sheriff is accused of bank fraud, mail fraud, insurance fraud.....

But did you know that in Toobworld, the most beloved sheriff of all should be tarred with that same brush?

In a third season episode of 'The Andy Griffith Show', Mayor Stoner refused to sanction the financial under-writing of the Mayberry Band's trip to the state capital for the annual competition. His reason? They suck.

So Andy forces a visiting band of professional musicians, by threatening them with trumped-up charges (so there's another crime!), into acting as ringers in the marching band in order to deceive the Mayor.

Mayor Stoner doesn't realize he's been duped until the band's bus pulls out of town.

Here are the relevant clips from that episode:

Now, had this been real life, Andy would have lost his job as soon as he got back to Mayberry. But in the Tooboworld reality it was apparently okay as it was all for a "good cause". Of course, that cause entailed drinking, carousing, and probably even whoring by only an elite few from Mayberry. And all on the town's dime.

The dark underside of small town life......

It's as Sherlock Holmes said in "The Adventure Of The Copper Beeches":

"It is my belief, Watson, founded upon my experience, that the lowest and vilest alleys in London do not present a more dreadful record of sin than does the smiling and beautiful countryside.…

"[L]ook at these lonely houses, each in its own fields, filled for the most part with poor ignorant folk who know little of the law. Think of the deeds of hellish cruelty, the hidden wickedness which may go on, year in, year out, in such places, and none the wiser."

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: THOMAS à BECKET

On this date in 1170, Thomas Becket, Archbishop of Canterbury, is assassinated inside Canterbury Cathedral by followers of King Henry II; he subsequently becomes a saint and martyr in the Anglican Church and the Roman Catholic Church.

THOMAS à BECKET

AS SEEN IN:
"Who Killed Thomas Becket?"

AS PLAYED BY:
Guy Henry

From Wikipedia:
Thomas Becket (also known as Saint Thomas of Canterbury, Thomas of London, and later Thomas à Becket; circa 1118 – 29 December 1170) was Archbishop of Canterbury from 1162 until his murder in 1170. He is venerated as a saint and martyr by both the Roman Catholic Church and the Anglican Communion. He engaged in conflict with Henry II of England over the rights and privileges of the Church and was assassinated by followers of the king in Canterbury Cathedral. Soon after the death of Thomas Becket, Pope Alexander III canonized him.

You can read the Wikipedia account of Becket's assassination by clicking here.

And to see a dramatization of Becket's death, film-maker Andrew Chater's website has about six salient film clips from the documentary.

One of my favorite "historical" quotes comes from this event:

"Will no one rid me of this troublesome priest?" - Henry II

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: DENZEL WASHINGTON

DENZEL WASHINGTON

AS SEEN ON:
'Saturday Night Live'

AS PLAYED BY:
Jay Pharaoh

From Wikipedia:
Denzel Hayes Washington Jr. (born December 28, 1954) is an American actor, screenwriter, director, and film producer. He first rose to prominence when he joined the cast of the medical drama, 'St. Elsewhere', playing Dr. Philip Chandler for six years. He has received much critical acclaim for his work in film since the 1990s, including for his portrayals of real-life figures, such as Steve Biko, Malcolm X, Rubin "Hurricane" Carter, Melvin B. Tolson, Frank Lucas, and Herman Boone.

Washington, has received two Academy Awards, two Golden Globe awards, and a Tony Award. He is notable for winning the Best Supporting Actor for "Glory" in 1989; and the Academy Award for Best Actor in 2001 for his role in the film "Training Day".

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: GERARD DEPARDIEU

GERARD DEPARDIEU

AS SEEN ON:
'Saturday Night Live'

AS PLAYED BY:
Chris Farley

TV DIMENSION:
Skitlandia

From Wikipedia:
Gérard Xavier Marcel Depardieu (born 27 December 1948) is a French actor and filmmaker. He is a Chevalier of the Légion d'honneur, Chevalier of the Ordre national du Mérite and has twice won the César Award for Best Actor. He also won the Golden Globe award for Best Actor in "Green Card" and was nominated for an Academy Award for the title role in "Cyrano de Bergerac".

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: JOHN WALSH

JOHN WALSH

AS SEEN ON:
'Saturday Night Live'

AS PLAYED BY:
Phil Hartman

TV DIMENSION:
Skitlandia

From Wikipedia:
John Edward Walsh (born December 26, 1945) is an American television personality, criminal investigator, human and victim rights advocate and formerly the host, as well as creator, of 'America's Most Wanted'. Walsh is known for his anti-crime activism, which he became involved with following the murder of his son, Adam, in 1981; in 2008, the now dead serial killer Ottis Toole was named as the killer of Walsh's son. Walsh is part owner of the Museum of Crime & Punishment in Washington, D.C.

BCnU!

TVXOHOF, 12/2011 - SANTA LARRY

Last year, we wrote about Santa Larry, and promised that one day he would be inducted into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame. As it's Christmas, that day is now.

Larry was a professional Santa Claus representative who seemed to have incredibly bad luck all across the country, from Seattle to Washington, D.C., into America's heartland with a gig in the town of Orson, and then back East to Philadelphia.

After writing up that story on Santa Larry, it appears that he finally got his wish to actually "become" Santa Claus. Actually, it looks as though he was chosen by the real Kris Kringle, old St. Nick, to serve as a "Santa soul-clone"*, in which he was given the ability to create some Christmas magic on behalf of the Jolly Old Elf.

His first mission proved to be a success, as he helped a few teens in California to re-discover the true meaning of Christmas:

He claimed to be Wesley Guttelson, a door-to-door door salesman, but by the end of the episode, we saw the evidence that he had been granted that Christmas magic as a Santa soul-clone.  And although it did come with a few bumps and bruises, Santa Larry probably felt it was worth it - and besides, he definitely had suffered worse in years past!

As for this Christmas season, things were looking good for Santa Larry as he continued the tradition of helping the real Santa Claus. As an example, he gave advice and approval to a gift selected by a guy for his girl-friend:

From this blipvert, we can see that Santa Larry has been promoted to being one of the many Santa soul-clones who actually carry out the delivery of gifts all across the world so that it all gets done in one night. Santa Larry was finally in "the Game".

But then... the trouble started once again.....

Poor dude just can't catch a break!

Don't these women realize how this will cause a retaliation against them come next Christmas? They all deserve to be on the real Santa's naughty list. And they should get coal in their stockings!

But at any rate, Santa Larry has added more appearances to his Toobworld resume and is more than qualified to be a member of the TV Crossover Hall of Fame.

HoHoHo!

* The soul-clone theory was developed by Chuck Loridans in regards to Dracula. I didn't think it worked for the many televersions of Dracula, but with a slight adjustment (to be something more beneficent), I think we can use the term to apply to the many "real" Santas in Toobworld who don't look like Charles Durning, the official Santa Claus of Earth Prime-Time.

FROM ALL THE WHOS DOWN IN WHOVILLE.....

Welcome Christmas, Yahoo Dorais!

Since 2006, we've had the tradition of a special Christmas episode of 'Doctor Who' and tonight will be no different.

To get you in the mood - as if Whovians, the tall and the small, haven't been eagerly anticipating this for week! - here are a seiies of videos to lead up to the big broadcast. (Here in the United States, the show begins at 9 pm on BBC-Americia)

And hopefully that should tide you over until tonight's presentation of 'Doctor Who' - "The Doctor, The Widow, And The Wardrobe"......

Merry Christmas!
 



AS SEEN ON TV: THE CHRISTMAS SCHNOZZ

JIMMY DURANTE

AS SEEN IN:
"Frosty The Snowman"

AS VOICED BY:
Jimmy Durante

TV DIMENSION:
The Tooniverse

From Wikipedia:
James Francis "Jimmy" Durante (February 10, 1893 – January 29, 1980) was an American singer, pianist, comedian and actor. His distinctive clipped gravelly speech, comic language butchery, jazz-influenced songs, and large nose helped make him one of America's most familiar and popular personalities of the 1920s through the 1970s. His jokes about his nose included referring to it as a "Schnozzola", and the word became his nickname.

Jimmy Durante is known to most modern audiences as the character who narrated and sang the 1969 animated special "Frosty the Snowman". He also performed the Ron Goodwin title song to the 1968 comedy-adventure "Monte Carlo or Bust" sung over the film's animated opening credits. There are numerous Durante depictions and allusions in animation. Pumbaa does a brief Durante impression while singing "Hakuna Matata" in "The Lion King". A character in M-G-M cartoons, a bulldog named Spike, whose puppy son was always getting caught by accident in the middle of Tom and Jerry's activities, referenced Durante with a raspy voice and an affectionate "Dat's my boy!"

In another Tom and Jerry episode, a starfish lands on Tom's head, giving him a big nose. He then proceeds with Durante's famous "Ha-cha-cha-cha" call. A Durante-like voice (originally by Doug Young) was also given to the father beagle, Doggie Daddy, in Hanna-Barbera's "Augie Doggie and Doggie Daddy" cartoons, Doggie Daddy invariably addressing the junior beagle with a Durante-like "Augie, my son, my son," and with frequent citations of, "That's my boy who said that!" In the 1933 Warner Bros. Looney Tunes short, "Bosko's Picture Show", there is a scene where he is chased by Adolf Hitler with a meat cleaver.

Many 1940s Looney Tunes/Merrie Melodies cartoons had characters based on Durante. Two examples are "A Gruesome Twosome", which features a cat based on Durante and "Baby Bottleneck", which in unedited versions opens with a Durante-like stork. "Book Revue" shows the well-known (at that time) 1924 Edna Ferber novel "So Big" featuring a Durante caricature on the cover. The "so big" refers to his nose, and as a runaway criminal turns the corner by the book, Durante turns sideways using his nose to trip the criminal, allowing his capture. In the Looney Tunes/Merrie Melodies cartoon named "Hollywood Daffy", Durante is directly depicted as himself, pronouncing his catch-phrase "Those are the conditions that prevail!". One of Durante's common catch phrases, "I got a million of 'em!", was used as Bugs' final line in "Stage Door Cartoon".

A Durante-like voice was also used for Marvel Comics superhero The Thing in the Hanna-Barbera cartoon 'Fred and Barney Meet the Thing'. In a 1993 episode of 'The Simpsons' titled "Lady Bouvier's Lover", after Grampa cries out, "Good night, Mrs. Bouvier, wherever you are," the Blue-haired lawyer announces himself in charge of Jimmy Durante's estate and therefore puts a halt to Abraham Simpson's "unauthorized imitation" of Durante. The voice and appearance of Crispy, the mascot for Crispy Critters cereal, was also based on Durante.

In the main TV Universe of Earth Prime-Time, there are certain movies that have been "abducted" from the Cineverse and absorbed into the main Toobworld. I don't see why the same cannot be true for The Tooniverse - and therefore, "Hollywood Daffy" can be considered a prequel of "Frosty The Snowman", in that Durante's character in both are the same man, his own self just separated by 22 years.

BCnU!


MERRY CHRISTMAS!