Saturday, December 19, 2009

THE LEGEND OF SANTA LARRY

This is Larry.

I believe that all his life, it has been Larry's dream to play Santa Claus. No, even better - it has been his dream to BE Santa Claus.

It is the contention of Toobworld Central that Larry grew up in the Seattle region, and began playing Santa Claus at his family's holiday gatherings in his late teens. He parlayed that into gigs for office parties, at day care centers and schools, and finally he became a department store Santa at several of the area malls. He may have also volunteered to be one of the bell-ringing Santa Clauses on the street corners of Seattle.

After years of dedication to his craft, Larry finally made it to the big time: he was chosen to be THE Santa Claus for the annual Christmas Parade in Seattle, which was covered by Channel 6.

The Christmas Parade had a long tradition on Channel 6, since the days when it was covered by Bob Vernon and Sgt. Michelle the Traffic Lady. But by the 1990's, it was hosted by Cal and Kelly Kirkland - until 2000, when Kelly discovered that Cal had been boinking her cue card girl. Because of their impending divorce, Dr. Frasier Crane got a chance to co-host with Kelly; but when she was sidelined by an accident, Frasier's co-host was his rival at the radio station, "Dr. Mary". Poor Larry had no clue what was in store for him during that year's parade. When Santa Claus reached the Channel 6 reviewing stand, Frasier was so bent out of shape that "Dr. Mary" was horning in on his interview with Santa that the radio psychiatrist accidentally broke Santa's nose with his microphone.

[
You can see the full episode here.]

Even though he was the victim, it looks like Larry ended up paying the price. Perhaps because of his angry outburst over the bloody "attack", it could be that Larry lost the parade gig and was blacklisted from working as Santa in the general Seattle region. The reason we surmise this is because he finally resurfaced as Santa Claus seven years later... in Washington, D.C. Despite his setback in Seattle, it looks like Larry didn't lose his desire to be Santa Claus, nor did he lose his charitable spirit. But it was all severely tested when he and his fellow Santa volunteers were all suspects in the murder of another Santa Claus (who was legally named Kris Kringle).

Here's the promo for that episode:


After that, Larry decided to abandon the Nation's Capital and he headed to America's Heartland, deep in 'The Middle' of nowhere: Orson, Indiana. However, even there Larry wasn't safe from the travails of the job. Two years into his run, one visit to his lap by young Brick Heck, and Larry ended up questioning the meaning of his existence. Because of that, Larry couldn't even fulfill his commitment to play out the season as Santa Claus there in Orson. So he decided to find somewhere else where he could ply his trade as Saint Nick. And he chose Philadelphia.

I can picture his thought process: Philadelphia is the City of Brotherly Love. What could possibly go wrong?

Charlie Kelly for one...... The following clip is not safe for work. It's not safe for home viewing at home if you have impressionable children about. But here's what happened when Santa Larry met Charlie:

Charlie vs. Santa Claus

I'm hoping Santa Larry survived the attack. I'm pretty sure he did. But I also hope that it doesn't spoil his enthusiasm for playing that jolly old elf. Perhaps next year around this time of the season, in some part of the country, we'll see him again on some TV series in the role he was born to play - Santa Claus! BCnU!
This has been a post of pure speculation about the characters played by Donovan Scott (seen above as himself) in the following TV series:

"Frasier"
- Mary Christmas (2000)

"Bones"
- The Santa in the Slush (2007)
(This is the episode in which we learned that his real name is Larry.)

"The Middle"
- Christmas (2009)

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia: It's a Very Sunny Christmas (2009)

You can bet Santa's workshop that someday Santa Larry will be inducted into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame!

1 comment:

Rob said...

The fact that the same actor played a guy playing Santa in four tv series seems like a valid crossover to me. Especially since only one of these revealed his real name, thus no contradictions.