Sunday, June 14, 2009


Amazingly, there is still an ongoing battle about Creationism vs. Evolution. Here in the real world, your old Toobmeister knows the Truth: God caused the Big Bang and then let evolution (which He created) run its course.

In Toobworld, both theories have been used by script-writers when it comes to the beginnings of the planet Earth. In some shows, it's either established or believed by the characters that God created the Earth. In many of the sci-fi (NOT Sify!) series, the Earth was formed by the coalescence of cosmic debris; hardened into a sphere by gravity while trapped in the orbit around the Sun.

Or some such techno-babble. You want just the facts, Ma'am, you'll have to consult an expert. Go see Mr. Whoopee.
In order to have a cohesive TV Universe, one in which as many shows as possible share the same dimension, both points of view have to be represented. If we applied my own personal belief, that would solve everything. But where's the sport in that?

The Creation story and the scientific explanation both exist in Toobworld. That's because there were two Earths in the same TV dimension. That's right - no pussying around with an alternate TV dimension when it comes to this! The Universe of Toobworld had two Earths: Earth Prime-Time... and the other one.

We'll deal with the other one later in this essay. But first, the scientific explanation for the formation of Earth Prime-Time was further tweaked by another TV series which needs a bit of the ol' splainin.
Although the formation of the TV Earth may have followed the same pattern as other planets, it was an artificial construct. Like "Beatlemania" and the Presidency that resulted from the 2000 election, it wasn't the real thing but an incredible simulation.
As depicted in 'The Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy' (hereafter referred to as 'HHG2TG'), pan-dimensional beings contracted the planet builders of Magrathea to build a planet, based on the designs supplied by the super-computer known as "Deep Thought". This new computer was to be an even greater computer. Its purpose? To supply the question to the answer "42", which would explain Life, the Universe, and Everything.
As I said, the development of the Earth simulated the normal function of a planet. We saw the cosmic debris coalesce when the Time Lord known as "The Doctor" (10th edition) brought "The Runaway Bride" Donna Noble back in Time to witness the formation of that third rock from the Sun (which is all it would literally be at that point). While there, they saw the Racnossian sleeper ship of alien spider larvae embed itself into the core of the planet. (That was the first glitch in the programming of the Earth super-computer.
Although we couldn't see it, each of those rocks being brought together to form Earth Prime-Time was being guided by nanobot robots developed by the Magratheans. It was a process that saved them from having to do the manual labor.
It was an earlier incarnation of the Doctor, the 4th edition, who would later (as in the linear cosmic timeline, not his personal history) initiate the impetus for the spark of Life to begin in the primordial ooze. In the 'Doctor Who' adventure "The City Of Death", the Doctor and fellow Gallifreyan Romana (technically a Gallifreyenne?) were instrumental in the destruction of Scaroth's spaceship. The resultant atomic explosion provided the energy to mutate the molecules at the beginning of the chain of Life. (Yet another glitch in Deep Thought's original blueprint for Earth.)
In a way, the Doctor (yet another incarnation, his 5th) further interfered with the natural evolution of Earth Prime-Time, as seen in the adventure "EarthShock". The Doctor's young Companion from E-Space, Adric, sacrificed himself to eliminate another threat by the Cybermen (who will figure heavily in the second part of this essay). With the detonation of that space freighter practically in the Earth's atmosphere, Adric brought an end to the Age of the Dinosaurs. (By that point in Time, the dinosaurs had evolved to be intelligent - or, at the very least, they had TV, as seen in 'Dinosaurs!').
So if Deep Thought originally saw those evolved dinosaurs as part of the computer's programming matrix, here was yet another glitch.
So when Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect arrived with the Golgafrinchams during the time of the Neanderthals, Earth Prime-Time as a computer was already well and truly bolluxed.
Basically Earth Prime-Time continued on its evolutionary path along the same lines as the One True Earth from our dimension... with the additional minor details like the occasional alien invasion, the visitation by other dimensional beings who passed themselves off as deities, as well as other deviations brought about by the imaginations of TV script-writers.
So that's Earth Prime-Time, the main Toobworld. As seen by the examples listed here, this Earth came about via scientific (and sci-fi-ific) methods; it was not created out of thin air by God the Almighty.

But that's what happened with that other Earth.....
"Mondas" is the name by which we know the other Earth in the TV Universe. According to the 1st incarnation of the Doctor, "Mondas" is one of the oldest known words for "Earth".

Mondas once shared the exact same orbit as Earth Prime-Time, always equi-distant from each other so that neither one was visible to the other in their night sky. Mondas looked exactly like the Earth, only turned upside down. (Technically, the Earth looks like Mondas, only turned upside down, as Mondas was created first.)

Because Earth and Mondas look exactly alike, it is the belief of Toobworld Central that Deep Thought co-opted the design of Mondas to serve as the model for Earth Prime-Time. Only he had the Magratheans flip it over - probably to avoid a copyright infringement lawsuit brought by God.
"God created the Heavens and the Earth."

You already know how I interpret this in the real world. But for the sake of Toobworld, I will accede that God took a direct hand in the creation of at least the Sol System, with "Earth" being Mondas. Let's face it - the other planets make such pretty neighbors to the big blue marble: a shimmering blue one to one side and a deep red one to the other; rings around one farther off and a big red spot on yet another, with a tiny wannabe flitting about at the farthest reaches of the Sol System - sometimes a planet, but currently out of favor as one. (In Toobworld, Pluto will one day regain its planetary status.) It's nice to think somebody put them all there to keep us company.

So God created the Sol System - "The Heavens" - directly, as the setting for his special project, Mondas aka Earth I. It was on Mondas that many of the events of Genesis took place - the real Adam and Eve, the whole Garden of Eden psych-out. As Mondas was created long before Earth Prime-Time was manufactured, their version of Mankind was already on the fast trick in social, scientific, and physical development.

For the purposes of Toobworld, it will be conjectured that by the time of the Great Flood (which did occur on Earth Prime-Time) the Mondasians had discovered the existence of the super-computer Earth on the far side of their own orbit, and proceeded to develop methods by which to reach it.

I'm thinking dimensional vortex with a direct route via wormhole. It would be cost-effective and it would be less likely to lose your luggage.
Like the other-dimensional humanoids who came to Earth Prime-Time and used their super-powers to pass themselves off as Gods to the humans at various points around the globe, the Mondasians arrived on Earth Prime-Time and presented their history to the Earthlings... who proceeded to interpret it as their religion. Basically a lot of that begattin' was happening back on Mondas.

Because Mondas came into existence first, fully formed and populated with humanoids quickly by the intercession of God, it was far ahead of Earth Prime-Time in its development. Their population may even have reached the scientific advancement Earth has now in its "second millennium" while Earth Prime-Time was still back in its own biblical times.

It's only a theory in progress for now, but certain TV shows that don't exactly work as part of Earth Prime-Time could conceivably be set on Mondas. Just so long as there is no mention of Earth particulars, like locations or historical figures, who's to say they didn't take place on the similar world of Mondas?

TV series set during the "Age of Legend" might be considered as candidates for Mondasian occupancy. "The Legend Of The Seeker", for example, with its unknown lands and a written language unknown to Earth, is a possibility. As would be the TV adaptations of 'Conan The Barbarian' and 'Beastmaster' - that is, so long as there was no mention of actual Terran touchstones.
It would have been nice to throw two recent series over to Mondas - 'Kings', with its kingdoms of Gath and Gilboa and its reliance on the intervention by God; and 'Krod Mandoon And The Flaming Sword Of Fire', since every world should have its own version of 'Get Smart'. But 'Kings' mentioned Liszt and Beethoven, while 'Krod Mandoon' invoked Atlantis. For alls I know, the other sword-and-sorcery shows (which also includes 'Wizards And Warriors') might be negated for similar reasons, but for now, it works, mate!

Eventually, Mondas left its orbit around the Sun and shot off across the universe, as dictated by the story demands of 'Doctor Who'. (This would lead to the creation of the Cybermen.) It will be the Toobworld position that this happened around the same time as the Great Flood on Earth Prime-Time.

Since the intervention by God was so instrumental in the history of Mondas, the Almighty might as well be the cause for Mondas' expulsion from the solar system. As the planet had been his pet project, and one that he had submitted to the tribunal of regents at his master's degree presentation, God must have been quite displeased with the results. And so he banished Mondas from the star system of Sol, and it would not return until the mid-1980's.
Meanwhile, God saw that the absence of Mondas from its geo-synchronous orbit with Earth Prime-Time would play hob with the tidal system of Toobworld. And so God finally stepped in to meddle in the affairs of Mankind - the Terran variety. He warned Noah of the coming floods and instructed him to build the Ark.

So for the purposes of Toobworld, that's a possible way in which religion and science can be reconciled when it comes to the creation of the Earth... at least as far as the TV Universe is concerned.
(May 2009)
'Doctor Who'
'The Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy'
"The Big Bang"
"Noah's Ark"
'Hercules: The Legendary Journeys'
'Krod Mandoon And The Flaming Sword Of Fire'
'Conan The Barbarian'
'Wizards & Warriors'
'Legend Of The Seeker'
'Get Smart'
'Tennessee Tuxedo'


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