TODAY'S TWD: WOLSEY WOOZY

'The Tudors' has entered its second season on Showtime at the end of March, but one of the main historical characters from the first season failed to return for the new batch of episodes. As played by Sam Neill, Thomas Cardinal Wolsey met his Maker in the season finale, slashing his own throat rather than be returned to London to possibly face execution for treason.

Earth Prime-Time, the main Toobworld, already has the life of King Henry VIII woven into its fabric, thanks to the 1970s mini-series starring Keith Mitchel, 'The Six Wives Of Henry VIII'. (John Baskcomb played Wolsey in that production.) The version of History presented by 'The Tudors', with its graphic emphasis on sex, would not only be the representative of an alternate TV dimension, but I believe it should be housed in the Evil Mirror TV Universe. And the death of Cardinal Wolsey as depicted in the show makes the argument for me.
I won't deny Cardinal Wolsey was a sinner. He had illegitimate children by his mistress; he destroyed those around him who were a threat to the power he amassed; and he quite likely was conspiring against Henry. But even with the vagaries of Time, there's never been any suggestion in any of the histories that he cut his own throat to avoid the executioner's blade. All of them hew to the story that he died of some sort of illness on his journey back from Yorkshire.

Maybe based on that, the theory could have been proposed that he had been poisoned - but again, not by his own hand.

The way I see it, lapsed Catholic that I am, Wolsey would have considered all of his many offenses in life to be forgiven with penance and absolution before he died, or through the punishment of Purgatory after his death. But there would never be salvation after death by suicide. Wolsey's faith would have dictated that his soul be cursed to Hell for Eternity for such a crime against self.

That he would do so anyway can only mean that this televersion of Thomas Wolsey was in the Evil Mirror Universe.

(Just for giggles, I'm also presenting pictures of Wolsey as played by John Gielgud in the 1988 TV production and Orson Welles from the 1960s movie "A Man For All Seasons".....)

BCnU!
Toby OB

CALVIN: A MIRACLE TWO YEARS RUNNING

The word "miracle" has pretty much lost its power over the years from being too easily used. "Miracle seasons" in sports? Really? That kind of cheapens the Miracle at Cana to being just a parlor trick.

Today is Calvin's birthday. (Actually, since he's now in Taiwan, it was yesterday.) He's the youngest son of Sean & Gosia, two of my dearest friends. As they might say in "Elfquest", they are family in all but blood. (Their middle child, Rhiannon, is my god-daughter.)

Calvin is now two. And that he made it to this milestone really justifies the use of the word "miracle".
His grand-mother sent out an e-mail today that tells Calvin's story far better than I can. And with her permission, I present it here:

Today is a very special day. It was two years ago exactly that we got the kind of phone call you hope never to get from someone you love. It was from Sean in Taiwan, telling us that their just-born son, Calvin, was not expected to live, and that Gosia, after a three-hour emergency surgery during which she stopped breathing, and needed 9 units of blood, was in very critical condition.

Well, if you know even the slightest bit of the story since then, you rejoice with us that Gosia is alive and well; and both she and Sean have put in an all-out effort to bringing that little kid out of dialysis, off the respirator, through countless hyperbaric oxygen treatments and from feeding tube to successful breast-feeding [which "they" said could never be done.] His sight is improving and his motor skills - the brain area judged most damaged - are responding to continuous therapy - bit by bit, but unmistakably. He knows each parent's voice and responds excitedly. He loves the beach and wants to move toward the sound of the waves as soon as he hears them.

On the iffy side, since swallowing is still not entirely natural for him, some of what he eats does come back up, and weight gain is a very elusive goal, which makes him vulnerable in fighting off infections, colds, etc. Even teething seems to bring on the petit mal seizures to which he is prone, But on the plus side, he's been experimenting with chewing which is a monumental milestone.

Sean sends us the gift of a twice-weekly blog so we can be somewhat in on their lives. Last week, he wrote:

"We know it is very slow, and it's a lot of work (especially for him) but he's a happy boy.
His birthday is next Tuesday -- he'll be two.

If you have any extra prayers, please dedicate them to Calvin."

Two years ago, when I told Sean about the outpouring of your prayers and concern, he said "That's the ground we walk on."

For then and for now, from them and from us, THANK YOU.
The "Cur" family, near and far

What does all this have to do with TV? Nothing, really. But then again, "My So-Called Life" is part of Toobworld, thanks to certain TV shows of my youth. So Calvin is one of the supporting players in my large cast of characters.

And if he had to have an alter-ego, "Miracle Kid" is as good as any.....

Happy Birthday, Calvin.

BCnU...
Toby OB

TVXOHOF APRIL '08: JOSE, CAN YOU SEE?

In our hardened society, the sweetly gentle and innocent must look like fools. Time and again, they are always proven to be wiser. And so it is that it's a wise fool whom we induct this month into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame. He has his requisite three shows in Earth Prime-Time to his credit, but he has made his mark in so many of the alternate dimensions as well - the Tooniverse, Skitlandia, the Cineverse, and even in a fictional universe born from the creative spark of long-playing records.....

His name... Jose Jimenez.

Here are the basic facts about Bill Dana's most famous and enduring character from Wikipedia:

José Jiménez was a fictional character created and performed by comedian Bill Dana on the Steve Allen Show in 1959 and who became increasingly popular during the 1960s. This character introduced himself with the memorable line: "My name...José Jiménez".
During the course of his José Jiménez acts, Bill Dana (who is of Hungarian-Jewish ancestry unlike the Hispanic character he played) took his character through various roles including elevator operator, sailor, and submariner until settling into the most famous occupation that José would hold: astronaut.

Perhaps surprisingly, the character of José Jiménez caught on amongst the seven Mercury astronauts and Dana became good friends with the astronauts. "Okay, José, you're on your way!" Deke Slayton quipped as Alan Shepard's famous first flight launched, in reference to the astronaut parody.

For his role as José the Astronaut, Dana was officially made an honorary Mercury astronaut.

As time passed, Dana realized that such ethnic humor by a person not of that ethnic group was becoming offensive. In 1970 he announced that he would no longer affect the José Jiménez character. In 1997 Dana received an image award from the National Hispanic Media Coalition.

Jose Jimenez proved to be very popular in many sketch comedy shows of the late fifties, early sixties - 'The Steve Allen Show', 'The Spike Jones Show' and 'Hollywood Palace', among others. And because of that, Jose Jimenez is a resident of the Toobworld off-shoot, "Skitlandia". He also appeared in a cartoon version and so he also resides in the Tooniverse as well. And on a comedy album by Joey Forman (as the Mashuganishi Yogi) which spoofed the Indian mystic movement popular in the psychedelic sixties, Jose Jimenez made a cameo appearance as well as appeared in the album art.

So Jose Jimenez really gets around in the Multiverse!

His "life" in the main Toobworld, Earth Prime-Time, has not been neglected, and it is for his appearances in three different TV series that he's being inducted into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame.

'The Bill Dana Show'
'Make Room For Daddy'
'Batman'
On 'The Bill Dana Show', Jose was a bellman at a New York City hotel where he worked with the cousin of Maxwell Smart, Byron Glick the hotel dick. Many sites say that the sitcom was a spin-off of 'Make Room For Daddy' and I vaguely remember Bill Dana playing Jose as the elevator operator on that show which starred Danny Thomas. However, my Westphallian counterparts (See Tommy Westphall's Mind in the links to the left.) have been disputing this.

But I'm going to allow it, based on the remembrance of an impeccable source. According to Marjorie Lord's website, it looks like Bill Dana was appearing as Jose Jimenez on 'Make Room For Daddy'.

Here's an entry from her episode guide for the show, ninth season:

Season 9251.
"For Every Man There's a Woman"
guest stars: Bill Dana (Jose Jimenez)
Tonight, comedian Bill Dana appears as his own character creation Jose Jimenez.
aired: 02-Oct-1961

That's good enough for me!

And then there was his "Bat-Climb Cameo" on 'Batman'. When the camp superhero show was at its peak in popularity, all of the stars wanted the chance to lean out a window and meet the Dynamic Duo, from Jerry Lewis and Edward G. Robinson to Santa Claus and the Carpet King.


Jose popped out of a Gotham City high-rise window in the episode "The Yegg Foes Of Gotham" and told Batman and Robin he was watching some crazy people on TV.

Why was he in Gotham City? Don't know; don't care. That small bit is enough to fulfill the requirements for entry into the Hall.

So here's to you, Jose Jimenez. Maybe you're no longer politically correct in the real world, but in Toobworld you are still remembered fondly in references on such shows as 'Seinfeld' and 'Farscape'.

BCnU!
Toby OB

TODAY'S TWD: CONEY ISLAND

"Reclassified", what may turn out to be the penultimate episode of 'New Amsterdam', centered around the Astroland amusement park in Coney Island. As with many facets of life in New York City, 400 year old John Amsterdam knew a lot about the history of the area, and so he probably knew the Lenape Indians called the island Narrioch which means "the land without shadows".

John's people, the Dutch, called the place "Conyne Eylandt", which means "Rabbit Island" and which can be found on the New Netherland map of 1639. Apparently, when it was an island, the place was overrun with rabbits right up to the early 20th Century.

Several of the amusement park locations came into play during the episode; especially the Wonder Wheel ferris wheel, but also "Dante's Inferno" where Chechin mobster/snitch Nazir was hanging out when Amsterdam spotted him.

Most of the few remaining attractions at Coney Island are going to be razed to be replaced by housing and business developments. However, three of the rides at Coney Island are protected as designated NYC landmarks, as well as recognized by the National Register of Historic Places. So they're safe from getting torn down.

From Wikipedia:

1] Wonder Wheel. Built in 1918 and opened in 1920, this steel ferris wheel has both stationary cars and rocking cars that slide along a track. It holds 144 riders, stands 150 feet tall, and weighs over 2,000 tons. At night the Wonder Wheel's steel frame is outlined and illuminated by neon tubes. It is part of Deno's Wonder Wheel Amusement Park.

2] The Cyclone roller coaster, built in 1927, is one of the nation's oldest wooden coasters still in operation. A favorite of some coaster aficionados, the Cyclone includes an 85-foot, 60 degree drop. It is owned by the City, and operated by Astroland, under a franchise agreement. It is located across the street from Astroland.

3] The Parachute Jump, originally the Life Savers Parachute Jump at the 1939 New York World's Fair, was the first ride of its kind. Patrons were hoisted 190 feet in the air before being allowed to drop using guy-wired parachutes. Although the ride has been closed since 1968, it remains a Coney Island landmark and is sometimes referred to as "Brooklyn's Eiffel Tower."

John Amsterdam was in the area hoping to track down who shot his first partner on the force, Andy Gleason. The bullet couldn't be removed since it was too close to his heart and its lead coating caused Andy to get leukemia. After the case was solved, Andy asked John for one last favor - to ride the Wonder Wheel with him one last time, even though John was scared of heights. While they were near the top, Andy passed away.

Coney Island came into play with several other TV shows, two of them with events that happened in the past. From 'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit', Detective Brian Cassidy can best describe what happened best at one of these situations:

"There was this guy in the hood that she liked, this guy named Vince. She went down to Coney Island to, uh, to see him. You know that whole 'under the boardwalk, down by the sea' thing? After Vince... did her... his whole set wolf-packed her. Seven, eight guys... she's not sure. Which is bad enough, Captain, but it just gets worse. They left her there, uh, by herself, in the cold, wrapped up in a beach towel. It was after dark, you know, and she couldn't walk. She just sat there in what was left of her... clothes, and this guy comes along and asks her if she needs some help, and she says, 'yes, please... thank you.' And this guy... this, uh... this Good Samaritan, he, uh... he..." (He then broke down, crying.)

The other connection to the Coney Island of Toobworld Past is more famous. When he was a boy, Ed Norton's beloved dog Lulu jumped off his lap in the Tunnel of Love to chase after a cocker spaniel. Ever since he lost Lulu, Norton walks in his sleep crying out "Luluuuuuu!", which of course drives his pal Ralph Kramden nuts. (From 'The Honeymooners') Ralph tried to cure the sleepwalking by getting Norton a new dog, but all that did was make the sewer worker walk in his sleep while carrying the new dog.

Once more from Wikipedia:
Astroland owner Carol Hill Albert, whose family had owned the park since 1962, sold the site to developer Thor Equities in November 2006 for $30 million. Thor proposed a $1.5 billion renovation and expansion of the Coney Island amusement area to include hotels, shopping, movies, an indoor water park and the city's first new roller coaster since the Cyclone. The developers hope to start construction in 2007 and complete the project by 2011. However, recent deals allowed Astroland to operate for one more year; the park's opening day is set for March 16, 2008.

BCnU!
Toby OB

"Let me have Coney Island."
Father William Mulcahy
'M*A*S*H'

WHUU-UHHHH?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GcatQSyRK6c

You can get a "Who's On First" dialogue going here........

What is the most used line of dialogue in "Lost"?

Yes.

Yes is the most used line of dialogue in "Lost"?

No.

What is then?

Yes. What is the most used line of dialogue in "Lost".

I'm asking you!

Dude.

BCnU!

Toby OB

TODAY'S TWD: LEW WALLACE

With the passing of Charlton Heston, attention has been drawn once again to his Oscar-winning role of Judah Ben-Hur in the movie "Ben-Hur". Cecil B. DeMille's film was based on the 1880 novel by Lew Wallace, "Ben-Hur: A Tale Of The Christ".

Wallace (April 10, 1827 – February 15, 1905) was a lawyer who organized troops for the Union Army during the Civil War and was finally rewarded with his own regiment. Unfortunately, at the Battle of Shiloh he screwed up because of his interpretation of General Grant's hand-written marching orders which Wallace deemed too vague. As a result, he arrived too late to provide support for Sherman during the first forays and so Sherman had to pull back. Wallace and his division were finally in place to hold the extreme right of the Union line and were the first to attack on the second day of the battle - 146 years ago today.

From Wikipedia:
At first, there was little fallout from this. Wallace was the youngest general of his rank in the army and was something of a "golden boy." Soon, however, civilians in the North began to hear the news of the horrible casualties at Shiloh, and the Army needed explanations. Both Grant and his superior, Halleck, placed the blame squarely on Wallace, saying that his incompetence in moving up the reserves had nearly cost them the battle. (Sherman, for his part, remained mute on the issue.) Wallace was removed from his command in June and reassigned to the much less glamorous duty commanding the defense of Cincinnati in the Department of the Ohio.

Personally, Wallace was devastated by the loss of his reputation as a result of Shiloh. He worked desperately all his life to change public opinion about his role in the battle, going so far as to literally beg Grant to "set things right" in Grant's memoirs. Grant, however, like many of the others Wallace importuned, refused to change his opinion.

Wallace participated in the military commission trial of the Lincoln assassination conspirators as well as the court-martial of Henry Wirz, commandant of the Andersonville prison camp. He resigned from the army in November 1865.

Wallace held a number of important political posts during the 1870s and 1880s. He served as governor of New Mexico Territory from 1878 to 1881, and as U.S. Minister to the Ottoman Empire from 1881 to 1885. As governor, he offered amnesty to many men involved in the Lincoln County War; in the process he met with Billy the Kid (Henry McCarty).

On 17 March 1879, the pair arranged that Kid would act as an informant and testify against others involved in the Lincoln County War, and, in return, Kid would be "scot free with a pardon in [his] pocket for all [his] misdeeds." But the Kid returned to his outlaw ways and Governor Wallace withdrew his offer.

While serving as governor, Wallace completed the novel that made him famous: "Ben-Hur: A Tale of the Christ". It grew to be the best-selling American novel of the 19th century. The book has never been out of print and has been filmed four times (1907, 1925, 1959, and 2003.) It was the first work of fiction to be blessed by a pope.

Recently, historian Victor Davis Hanson has argued that the novel was based heavily on Wallace's own life, particularly his experiences at Shiloh and the damage it did to his reputation. There are some striking similarities: the book's main character, Judah Ben-Hur accidentally causes injury to a high-ranking commander, for which he and his family suffer no end of tribulations and calumny.

I knew Lew Wallace appeared in Toobworld at least twice - played by Cameron Mitchell in "The Andersonville Trial", and in an episode of 'Law Of The Plainsman'. Not knowing who played him in that show, I checked out the character at the IMDb.com, and was surprised to find that Wallace had so many televersions:

Rene Auberjonois (Gov. Lew Wallace) . . . Longarm (1988) (TV)

Wilford Brimley (Gov.Lew Wallace) . . . Billy the Kid (1989) (TV)

Matt Crowley (I) (General Lew Wallace) . . . "Philco Television Playhouse, The" (1948)

{The Death of Billy the Kid (#7.23)} TV Series

Frank Ferguson (I) (Lew Wallace) . . . "Tall Man, The" (1960)

{The Great Western (#1.37)} TV Series

Len Hendry (General Lew Wallace) . . . "Branded" (1965)

{A Destiny Which Made Us Brothers (#2.19)} TV Series

Forrest Lewis (Gen. Lew Wallace) . . . "Bronco" (1958)

{Death of an Outlaw (#2.13)} TV Series

Dayton Lummis (Lew Wallace) . . . "Death Valley Days" (1952)

{Shadows on the Window (#8.19)} TV Series

Cameron Mitchell (I) (Gen. Lew Wallace) . . . Andersonville Trial, The (1970) (TV)

Robert Warwick (I) (Governor Lew Wallace) . . . "Law of the Plainsman" (1959)

{Amnesty (#1.27)} TV Series

The fact that I would do the research into the life of Lew Wallace on the anniversary of his involvement at Shiloh was a bit of "serendipiteevee". And here's another:

In 1957 Charlton Heston - the reason I'm writing about Wallace - played Chipman in a 'Climax!" episode entitled "The Trial Of Captain Wirz", which was also about the Andersonville Trial.

BCnU!
Toby OB

MESSAGE TO MARKHAEL (WELL, ½ ANYWAY)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MICHAEL!

THERE MAY BE NOTHING LIKE A DAME,

BUT YOU'RE A SINGULAR SENSATION!

ALL THE BEST FROM TOOBWORLD CENTRAL

"ADRIFT" IN THE RIFT

In the 'Torchwood' episode "Adrift", Gwen investigated the rift disappearance of a fifteen year old boy named Jonah Bevan, despite Captain Jack's orders for her to drop the case. Eventually she found out that he, along with about sixteen others "abducted" by the Rift, was being held in an underground facility on an island in Bristol Channel.

Only Jonah was no longer a fifteen year old boy. Although he disappeared only seven months before, he was now about 57 years of age in appearance. And he was scarred and his lung tissue seared by the "ravages of the Rift" - Jonah had been dumped onto a planet burning itself away and would have died there, had it not been for the intervention of his own personal savior.

We don't learn the identity of the man who rescued Jonah, but he must have been human in appearance. Despite the disorientation and pain he must have been feeling, Jonah seems to have been cogent enough at the time to remember what was happening to him. The man brought him to what Jonah thought was a building, but as it turned out it proved to be some kind of spaceship.

So what if Jonah had been rescued by the Doctor, and that "building" was the TARDIS? By the time the Doctor got him to the TARDIS, Jonah was probably on the edge of consciousness and he may have only seen the entrance; so he could have mistaken it for a porch-like entrance into the building. Surely he would have had the standard reaction upon entry - "It's so much bigger on the inside!" - and so would have assumed he was in a building.

Now the question is.... if the Doctor did rescue him, which Doctor?

We've got ten incarnations to choose from, but I'm staking my quatloos on the Eighth Doctor as played by Paul McGann. McGann's Doctor only appeared on TV (and thus in Toobworld) only once: in the 1996 FOX TV movie. McGann has had the opportunity to reprise the role several times in Big Finish audioplays, and there are also novels based on his version of the character. But for Toobworld, there's just the one performance. (Although a sketch of him does appear in the Tenth Doctor adventure "Human Nature"/"Family of Blood".)

That means that of all the Doctors, he's got the most leeway into which other adventures can be added in. For instance, Janis Joplin gave the Doctor the greatcoat which the Tenth Doctor wears in "Gridlock". We can make the claim that it was the Eighth Doctor who received that boon. So the Eighth Doctor would be the best option for the Gallifreyan Time Lord to have made the rescue of Jonah Bevan.
And there's another reason why McGann's Doctor works best - his traveling Companion was Dr. Grace Holloway, a trained physician. She would have done all that she could to treat Jonah's wounds and bring him back to health. And depending at what stage in her travels with the Doctor that this happened, she may have been the one to suggest that Jonah stay with them as another companion while he recuperated.

See, by the end of that TV movie, the Doctor had fallen in love with Dr. Holloway. But she was still a mortal Earthling and prone to aging. Grace would have realized that she was going to eventually die and leave the Doctor behind, alone. She may have thought adding a new Companion early on would make that transition in her own relationship with him - okay, okay her death! - easier for the Doctor to handle.

We have nothing established in the "New Who" as to how long the Doctor was in his Eighth incarnation; it could have been decades, even centuries. (Toobworld believes that the Doctor lies when he now says he is only 904 years old.) So it's Toobworld theory that Grace Holloway and the Doctor were together until she died; she never would have voluntarily left him, nor he her. And Jonah was there at the end and beyond, perhaps even decades himself. And through all that time, he shared in the Doctor's adventures - until he finally had the misfortune of gazing into the heart of a dark star.
(I'm not about to write it up myself, but I do have a suggestion for such a story - Jonah could have infiltrated a Sontaran squadron.....)

That experience drove him mad. And even though the Doctor was able to bring him mostly back from the realm of insanity (thanks to the mind-meld techniques he learned in his Second Incarnation while on the planet Vulcan), Jonah was never truly cured. The madness would consume him for hours on end so that he was reduced to a primal, unnerving howl. Eventually that phase of madness would keep growing until it totally possessed him, and that's when the Doctor did the only thing he could think of - he returned Jonah back home to Earth. (Gallifrey wouldn't have accepted him, concerned as they would probably have been by then with the Time War.) Because of the vagaries of the TARDIS controls, they returned seven months after he had vanished... but forty years or more might have passed in Jonah's personal timeline.

The Eighth Doctor wouldn't have previously known Captain Jack; the rogue Time Agent first met Doctor #9. And if Jack did encounter the Doctor in any of his other incarnations before he was scheduled to encounter him, he would have kept his identity a secret. The Doctor might have known about this secret installation run by Torchwood, but had no clue who Jack was nor what Torchwood's true objective was. All he knew was that they were able to care for victims of the Rift, so that's why he brought Jonah back to Cardiff. The other returnees may have been brought back by the Rift itself, but Jonah Bevan had to be returned by the man who had saved him.

All of that is pure speculation, but if it did happen, it was more than Gwen Cooper needed to know about Jonah's case. So Jack just said that he, like the other sixteen returnees, had been brought back by the Rift.

It's too late to make a long story short, but what it comes down to is this:

For the question of Who rescued Jonah from that burning planet, the answer is "Yes."

BCnU!
Toby OB

THE HAT SQUAD: CHARLTON HESTON

Kirk Douglas, Elizabeth Taylor, Lauren Bacall....

Off the top of my head, I'd say they were the last of Hollywood's Golden Age of great stars we have left, now that Charlton Heston is gone. He probably came in at the tail end of that star system, but there are few who made movies that were bigger, that could be considered epics.

Just a list of his movies in which he played historical figures is a commanding package of which any actor would feel his resume was complete:

Moses - "The Ten Commandments"
John The Baptist - "The Greatest Story Ever Told"
Michelangelo - "The Agony And The Ecstasy"
Henry VIII - "Crossed Swords"
"El Cid"
General Gordon - "Khartoum"
Marc Antony - "Julius Caesar" & "Antony And Cleopatra"
Andrew Jackson - "The President's Lady" & "The Buccaneer"
and my personal favorite of the historical characters,
Cardinal Richelieu - "The Three Musketeers" & "The Four Musketeers"

And it's possible that some of the movies he appeared in would have been considered schlock without his contributions - "Planet Of The Apes", "Soylent Green", "The Omega Man", "Earthquake", and "Airport 1975". (I still would have gone to see them though!)

Like many actors of his stature (for instance, Richard Widmark, who passed away two weeks ago), Charlton Heston will be remembered for his movies. But he had a body of work for television that was just as impressive.

The full list is below, but here are just some of the highlights first:

BEN-HUR - In one of his last roles, after his withdrawal from most public appearances, Heston lent his voice to an animated adaptation of the life of Lew Wallace's hero, Judah Ben-Hur. So his most famous role in the movies also was given life in an alternate dimension of Toobworld.

THE OUTER LIMITS (FINAL APPEAL, PARTS 1 & 2) - This is probably the best use of a clip show ever in a series. If you're going to do it right, pack the new material with mega-watt stars to disguise the fact that it's a clip show. Heston played the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court near the end of this century, about twenty five years after a nuclear holocaust destroyed most of the world. Those who survived chose a strictly-enforced bucolic life with harsh penalties for the use of technology. Also in the cast were Cicely Tyson, Hal Holbrook, Robert Loggia, Michael Moriarty, Swoosie Kurtz, Kelly McGillis, Wallace Langham, and Amanda Plummer.

SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE - Even though he sent a damning letter to Lorne Michaels about the quality of the show (as mentioned in the 15th anniversary special in 1989), Heston still agreed to come on and host the damned thing in 1987. And apparently he must have had a good time doing so, since he came back again six years later. In the first outing, Heston's best sketch was a spoof of mini-series that were based on the works of authors like Fletcher Knebel - "The President Has Mustard On His Chin". (In Skitlandia they'll probably be re-broadcasting that in the memory of their version of Heston.) But it was the 1993 episode of SNL that can boast having the best opening and monologue ever in the history of the series - Heston fell asleep in his dressing room, and when he awoke he found that the world had been taken over by apes! Between those two bits, even the opening credits montage had been re-filmed exactly, but with all the humans (the biker, the relaxing short order cooks) had been replaced by ape counterparts. (He also made appearances on 'Mad TV' and with Rowan & Martin.)

THE CRUCIFER OF BLOOD - As a fan of Sherlock Holmes, I'm not too keen on this TV adaptation of the stage play. But taken for what it is, it's an enjoyable way to wallow in the doings of Baker Street.

A MAN FOR ALL SEASONS - Between this and "The Crucifer Of Blood", and movies like "Crossed Swords" and "Khartoum", I wonder if there were people out there who believed that Heston was British? While 'The Six Wives Of Henry VIII' stands as the definitive take on the life of King Henry, this adaptation of the stage play brings the best look into the life of St. Sir Thomas More into the cathode light of Toobworld. (It wasn't the first production of the play on TV, however. That was broadcast in England back in 1964.)

THE COLBYS - By this point in his career, Heston deserved the chance to take it easier in his work and still rake in the big bucks while doing so. Although this spin-off from 'Dynasty' couldn't exactly catch the magic of the original, 'The Colbys' did have a stellar cast who gave it their best shot (including "Miss Barbara Stanwyck" and Ricardo Montalban).
CHIEFS - One of the last of the mini-series in its true form - most of those made for today are no more than glorified two-part TV movies. The hunt for a serial killer in a small town spanned three decades and was told through the lives of the three police chiefs during that time. Heston played a town leader who observed the investigations by the Chiefs played by Wayne Rogers, Brad Davis, and Billy Dee Williams. I think it's under-rated and you should give it a look if you get the chance.

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST - This is an episode of 'Shirley Temple's Storybook' which predated Shelley Duvall's 'Fairy Tale Theater' with its retellings of classic fairy tales with all-star casts. Claire Bloom played Beauty in this version; her sisters were played by June Lockhart and Barbara Baxley with EG Marshall as the Merchant - not a shabby lot! However, although I've never seen this (I'll have to check the Paley Center to see if they have it.), I wish Shirley Temple had played the role of Beauty instead. At least that way there might have been a chance for it to be included in one of the DVD boxed sets of episodes from the series that Ms. Temple-Black released. I think the role of the Beast is a perfect TV role for Heston.

Charlton Heston is a candidate for the TV Crossover Hall of Fame in the League of Themselves division for his appearances on four different series as fictional versions of himself:

"Cursed"

- ...And Then Larry Brought Charlton Heston Home

"Friends"
- The One with Joey's Dirty Day

"Space Ghost Coast to Coast"
- Dam

"America 2-Night"
- 60 Seconds of Fame

Here is the list of Charlton Heston's major TV credits:

Ben Hur (2003) (TV) (voice) .... Ben Hur

"The Outer Limits" .... Chief Justice Haden Wainwright (1 episode, 2000)

- Final Appeal (2000) TV episode .... Chief Justice Haden Wainwright

"Camino de Santiago" (1999) (mini) TV mini-series .... Professor Marcelo Rinaldi

Bagpipe: Instrument of War - Part 1 (1998) (TV) .... Narrator

"Sworn to Secrecy: Secrets of War" (1998) TV series .... Narrator (unknown episodes)

Bagpipe: Instrument of War - Part 2 (1998) (TV) .... Narrator

The Avenging Angel (1995) (TV) .... Brigham Young

"The Great Battles of the Civil War" (1994) (mini) TV mini-series (voice) .... Abraham Lincoln

"SeaQuest DSV" .... Abalon (1 episode, 1994)

- Abalon (1994) TV episode .... Abalon

James Michener's Texas (1994) (TV) .... Narrator

"Saturday Night Live" .... Host (2 episodes, 1987-1993)

- Charlton Heston/Paul Westerberg (1993) TV episode .... Host

- Charlton Heston/Wynton Marsalis (1987) TV episode .... Host

Noel (1992) (TV) (voice) .... Narrator

Crash Landing: The Rescue of Flight 232 (1992) (TV) .... Captain Al Haynes

The Crucifer of Blood (1991) (TV) .... Sherlock Holmes

The Little Kidnappers (1990) (TV) .... James MacKenzie

Treasure Island (1990) (TV) .... Long John Silver

Original Sin (1989) (TV) .... Louis Mancini

A Man for All Seasons (1988) (TV) .... Sir Thomas More

Christmas Night with the Two Ronnies (1987) (TV) .... Various Roles

"The Two Ronnies" (1 episode, 1987)

- 1987 Christmas Special (1987) TV episode

Proud Men (1987) (TV) .... Charley Mac Leod Sr.

"The Colbys" .... Jason Colby / ... (49 episodes, 1985-1987)

"Dynasty" .... Jason Colby (3 episodes, 1985)

Nairobi Affair (1984) (TV) .... Lee Cahill

"Chiefs" (1983) (mini) TV mini-series .... Hugh Holmes

"Hallmark Hall of Fame" .... Robert Devereaux, Earl of Essex / ... (2 episodes, 1963-1968)

- Elizabeth the Queen (1968) TV episode .... Robert Devereaux, Earl of Essex

- The Patriots (1963) TV episode .... Thomas Jefferson

"A Whole Scene Going" (1 episode, 1966)

- Episode #1.23 (1966) TV episode

What Is a Boy (1966) (TV)

"Alcoa Premiere" .... Paul Malone (1 episode, 1961)

- The Fugitive Eye (1961) TV episode .... Paul Malone

"Playhouse 90" .... Charles Gray / ... (2 episodes, 1956-1958)

- Point of No Return (1958) TV episode .... Charles Gray

- Forbidden Area (1956) TV episode .... Major Jesse Price

"Shirley Temple's Storybook" .... The Beast (1 episode, 1958)

- Beauty and the Beast (1958) TV episode .... The Beast

"Climax!" .... Chipman / ... (2 episodes, 1955-1957)

- The Trial of Captain Wirtz (1957) TV episode .... Chipman

- Bailout at 43,000 Feet (1955) TV episode .... Lieutenant Paul Peterson

"Schlitz Playhouse of Stars" (2 episodes, 1951-1957)

- Switch Station (1957) TV episode

- One Is a Lonesome Number (1951) TV episode

"General Electric Theater" .... Tim (1 episode, 1955)

- The Seeds of Hate (1955) TV episode .... Tim

"Omnibus" (1 episode, 1955)

- The Birth of Modern Times (1955) TV episode

"Robert Montgomery Presents" .... Peter Handley (3 episodes, 1952-1955)

- Along Came Jones (1955) TV episode

- The Closed Door (1952) TV episode .... Peter Handley

- Cashel Byron's Profession (1952) TV episode

"Danger" (1 episode, 1954)

- Freedom to Get Lost (1954) TV episode

"Your Show of Shows" (3 episodes, 1951-1954)

"Medallion Theatre" (1 episode, 1953)

- A Day in Town (1953) TV episode

"The Philco Television Playhouse" (2 episodes, 1950-1953)

- Elegy (1953) TV episode

- Hear My Heart Speak (1950) TV episode

"Curtain Call" (1 episode, 1952)

- The Liar (1952) TV episode

"Studio One" .... Edward Rochester / ... (12 episodes, 1949-1952)

Smoke (15 June 1949) - Actor

The Outward Room (26 September 1949) - Actor

Battleship Bismark (24 October 1949) - Actor

Of Human Bondage (21 November 1949) - Actor

Jane Eyre (12 December 1949) - Edward Rochester

The Willow Cabin (27 February 1950) - Actor

The Taming of the Shrew (5 June 1950) - Petruchio

Wuthering Heights (30 October 1950) - Heathcliff

Letter from Cairo (4 December 1950) - Actor

Macbeth (22 October 1951) - Macbeth

A Bolt of Lightning (12 November 1951) - James Otis

The Wings of the Dove (10 March 1952) - Actor

"Lux Video Theatre" (1 episode, 1951)

- Route 19 (1951) TV episode

"Suspense" (3 episodes, 1949-1951)

- Santa Fe Flight (1951) TV episode

- Suspicion (1949) TV episode (perhaps a live repeat of the earlier production?)

- Suspicion (1949) TV episode

"The Clock" (1 episode, 1950)

- The Hypnotist (1950) TV episode

"Mad TV" .... Himself (1 episode, 2001)

- Episode #7.7 (2001) TV episode .... Himself

"Cursed" .... Himself (1 episode, 2000)

- ...And Then Larry Brought Charlton Heston Home (2000) TV episode .... Himself

"Friends" .... Himself (1 episode, 1998)

- The One with Joey's Dirty Day (1998) TV episode .... Himself

"Space Ghost Coast to Coast" .... Himself (1 episode, 1997)

- Dam (1997) TV episode .... Himself

Saturday Night Live: 15th Anniversary (1989) (TV) .... Himself

"America 2-Night" .... Himself (1 episode, 1978)

- 60 Seconds of Fame (1978) TV episode .... Himself

So here's to you, Mr. Heston. I wasn't a fan of your politics (There's another reason most of your pictures here are on the right), but there's no denying what you brought to the movies and to Toobworld....

May God Bless.....

BCnU....
Toby OB

"When the doctors told me I was dying, I took a look at my life.
All these houses, helicopters, money... Good prizes...
I never gave a damn for any of them, really.
For me it was just doing it, a challenge... like a game."
Jason Colby
'The Colbys'

TODAY'S TWD: AN O'BIT O'BSERVATION

I wonder if the people who write obituaries ever notice the patterns that occur in the course of any given year when it comes to the famous people who died. Not just that old wives' tale about them dying in threes, but actual connections to others who also passed away during that same year.

I try to keep up to date on the celebituaries for Inner Toob, and I used to do quite a few Hat Squad tributes back in the day. So I read a lot but not as much as some others may, and yet I can see these themes every year.

And these are just a few I've noticed so far in 2008:

Jules Dassin
Malvin Wald
The director and screenwriter for the movie "The Naked City"

Richard Widmark
Abby Mann
The star and the screenwriter for "Judgement At Nuremberg"

And now....

Charlton Heston
Paul Scofield
Both played St. Sir Thomas More in "A Man For All Seasons"

Charlton Heston
Kirk Browning
Star and director of "Beauty And The Beast" an episode of 'The Shirley Temple Storybook'

Charlton Heston
Roy Scheider
Star and guest star of an episode of 'SeaQuest DSV'

BCnU.....
Toby OB