SUPER SIX: THE WORST JOBS IN TOOBWORLD

It's Labor Day, the time when we salute the American workforce. And that's why this Super Six list is going to take a look at a few of the thankless jobs to be found in Toobworld:

1) Security officer on the starship Enterprise in 'Star Trek'

It's a simple formula. Red Shirt = Expendable

2) Secretary for 'Murphy Brown'

The 'FYI' newswoman was notorious for firing her secretaries, usually just for some off-beat personal quirk but also for their incompetence. My friend Mary Cadorette played the very first secretary seen in the series, Sherry French. (That pilot episode had three altogether, culminating with the late great Kathleen Freeman.) Eventually many of them came back and kidnapped Murphy to put her on "trial" for the way she treated them (in the ninth season episode "Defending Your Life").
3) Mayor of Rome, Wisconsin ('Picket Fences')

When the Dancing Bandit was offered the opportunity to serve as the town's mayor rather than serve out her jail term, she saw it as a death sentence. One mayor died from spontaneous combustion; another was conked over the head with a frying pan and locked in a deep freezer; a third, already suffering from age-related dementia, was shot in the back of the head by his own son.

4) Henchman in Gotham City vs. 'Batman'

Let's face it - Crime doesn't pay.

5) Prosecuting attorney vs. 'Perry Mason' or 'Matlock'

I don't know how these people were able to keep their jobs, after losing so often to defense attorneys Perry Mason and Ben Matlock. Hamilton Burger was able to savor the sweet taste of victory only once in his series, but eventually Mason snatched it away from him. Oh well. At least he never slept with Mason like ADA Julie March probably did with Matlock......

6) Human resources representative for Dunder Mifflin at 'The Office'

I'd feel sorry for anybody who found themselves to be Michael Scott's nemesis, even if their name wasn't Toby.....
Have a happy Labor Day, every-a-body!