IF RONALD McDONALD HAD A DAUGHTER....

Here. Maybe this will take your mind off the scary monster.....



Homina thrice, I'm lovin' it!

BCnU!

RONALD McDRACULA

I have to figure that somewhere in Toobworld there is a Ronald McDonald who's really a vampire.....



If I was in Toobworld, I'd probably sleep better at night knowing this clown was over in the alternate TV dimension known as the Evil Mirror Universe.....

BCnU!

MAYBE HE'LL ANSWER TO "CHIP"

Taking a cue from Brent, our blogging buddy in the Great White North (You can find the link to his "I Am A Child Of Television" blog to the left, dawggs), this Saturday at least will be videos for the most part.

Starting with this Japanese commercial......

It's always been a rule in Toobworld that dogs who show intelligence are reincarnated humans. Lassie. Buck. Poochinski.

And then there's this long-haired loony from Japan......



He could also be a hybrid whose father came from Parenthia, like Alpha and Orvis in 'Bewitched'.....

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: EDMOND HALLEY

Here's a "holy grail" - I've searched for pictures from this episode for a long time. And now at last I have the televersion of Edmond Halley - thanks to Mark & Michael (who probably don't know I stole their full collection of the series!)

EDMOND HALLEY

AS SEEN IN:
'Tales From The Darkside'

AS PLAYED BY:
Fritz Weaver

From Wikipedia:

Edmond Halley FRS (8 November 1656 – 14 January 1742) was an English astronomer, geophysicist, mathematician, meteorologist, and physicist who is best known for computing the orbit of the eponymous Halley's comet.

In November 1703 Halley was appointed Savilian Professor of Geometry at the University of Oxford, his theological enemies, John Tillotson and Bishop Stillingfleet having died, and received an honorary degree of doctor of laws in 1710. In 1705, applying historical astronomy methods, he published Synopsis Astronomia Cometicae, which stated his belief that the comet sightings of 1456, 1531, 1607, and 1682 related to the same comet, which he predicted would return in 1758.

Halley did not live to witness the comet's return, but when it did, the comet became generally known as Halley's Comet.

"Comet Watch" starts as amateur stargazer Englebert Ames (Anthony Heald) is excited by the once in a lifetime opportunity to witness Halley's Comet which only passes the Earth every seventy-five point eight years. However while gazing at it through his old telescope something strange happens, he sees a woman heading towards him & she ends up coming out of the end of his telescope & into his room!

The woman says her name is Lara Burns (Sarah Rush) & that she found a time window in 1910 the last time Halley's Comet passed Earth which allowed her to ride it with its discoverer Edmund Halley (Fritz Weaver) who also drops into Englebert's room through his telescope to reclaim Lara but she doesn't want to go back with him...

(review by Paul Andrews for the IMDb)

According to the episode, the televersion of Halley must have faked his own death and then hid away until the comet returned. He may have spent all that time perfecting the way he could catch a lift via a time window and then travel the universe by riding the comet.And despite all that King Charles II had done for him, Halley harbored bitter restentment toward the regent for never granting him a knighthood for his work.

BCnU!

THE BUSH AND ALLEN SHOW

As I did my research into the four Harry Mortons, I stumbled across this video and knew I had to share it.....



BCnU!

MORTONS OF TOOBWORLD

My blogging buddy Ivan of "Thrilling Days Of Yesteryear" (see the link to the left, true believers!) wrote about Larry Keating, who played Harry Morton on George Burns' sitcoms:
"Television is where Keating really made his mark; he was tabbed by George Burns in 1953 to play the part of the Burns’ next-door neighbor Harry Morton (after Hal March, John Brown and Fred Clark had all taken a whack at it) on 'The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show', and Larry’s playing up of Harry’s oversized ego (with vocabulary to match) was the perfect counterpoint to wife Blanche’s (Bea Benaderet) withering sarcasm. (Keating also played Morton on 'The George Burns Show', a short-lived sitcom that followed Burns and Allen’s departure after eight seasons on CBS.)"

That's an awful lot of people to play that one role, something that's more likely in soap operas. Had it been only one man, maybe plastic surgery could have been the reason; or maybe Blanche married two different men by the same name, as Farmer Ziffel did with his two wives on 'Green Acres'. (At least that's my splainin for the two Mrs. Ziffels.)
According to the IMDb, here's the timeline for the actors who played the role:

Hal March ... Harry Morton (1950-1953)

John Brown ... Harry Morton (1951)

Fred Clark ... Harry Morton (1951-1953)

Larry Keating ... Harry Morton (1953-1958)

We're going to turn to 'Quantum Leap' for the splainin.
At some point in the future, the "Quantum Leap" project developed by Dr. Sam Beckett will finally be considered a success and available for general use. And it wouldn't have to be used only for scientific research. Like the Russians with the shuttle and Eve Thorne's plans for the commercialization of Global Dynamics in the town of 'Eureka', the governing board of the Quantum Leap facility may have decided to sell "trips" into the past via the accelerator. This would maintain the funding on the project without resorting to government handouts.

This enterprise would probably be one of the major reasons for a 'Timecop' policing agency.

I can imagine the first three men in the list of those who played Harry Morton to be multi-millionaires, able to pay the high price for the trip of a lifetime. But why would they have chosen to replace Harry Morton in the timeline?

Simple... it gave them the chance to indulge in their passion: being fans of vaudeville, "Old Time Radio" and the movies, they paid a fortune just for the chance to meet an idol, George Burns. They were able to play card games with George and Gracie, attend weddings held at the Burns home, and even enjoy the domestic life with Harry's wife Blanche (not that the 1950's audience in the Trueniverse would ever see what that fully entailed!)
The rich man played by John Brown only made one appearance on the show however, most likely because his trip was cut short. Those responsible were probably the Timecops or the Time Squad or some other Time Agent (like Captain Jack Harkness). Apparently the innate greed of that Harry Morton doppelganger got the better of him when Harry's wife Blanche mentioned that her life insurance was now increased to $20,000. Temporal protectors don't allow such threats to wreak havoc on the timeline.
Larry Keating would be the true Harry Morton, not seen by the Trueniverse audience until those three millionaires (maybe even billionaires!) had played out their fantasies. There weren't any others willing to make that particular time leap - as great as George and Gracie were, there's only so much interest to be found for them among multi-millionaires.

And so from that point on, once the "true" Harry Morton was returned from the waiting room in the future, it was only Larry Keating's televersion that was seen in Toobworld. This would lead into the sequel (after Gracie retired), as well as into a crossover with 'Love That Bob!' (which also featured George, Gracie, and Harry's wife Blanche.)

That crossover, by the way, puts Harry and Blanche into the running for the TV Crossover Hall of Fame. Perhaps for next June as a Gemini entry (unless the 'Softly, Softly' team finally gets their due.)

BCnU!

Thanks for the inspiration, Ivan!

AS SEEN ON TV: PRINCE WILLS

PRINCE WILLIAM

AS SEEN IN:
"Prince William"

AS PLAYED BY:
Jordan Frieda

Seen here with Prince Harry [played by Eddie Cooper]

BCnU!

BEING HUMAN IN AMERICA

'Being Human' is a great show about three people sharing a flat together in Bristol, England. Only those three people are a vampire, a werewolf, and a ghost.

Of course, U.S. TV network suits took notice and have decided to adapt it for the audience over here. This is a common enough practice in Toobworld, with some of the strongest examples being 'All In The Family', 'Sanford & Son', 'Three's Company' and now 'The Office' which keeps making new copies in other lands. From south of the border came the many clones of 'Betty la fea", including ABC's 'Ugly Betty'. ABC is currently running a summer series called 'Scoundrels' which is based on a New Zealand show, 'Outrageous Fortunes'.

And the trend works in reverse with foreign adaptations of 'Married With Children', 'Charlie's Angels', and all three of the major 'Law & Order' franchises.

What makes these adaptations easier to accept in Toobworld is in the revisions of the major characters. The situation can remain the same, but it helps if the characters' names were at least different. This is what was so hard about trying to find a way in which both the American and the original British versions of 'Life On Mars' in the same TV dimension - just about everybody had the same name in the remake. We had to wait until the American series played out to its conclusion before we could come up with the proper splainin. Even then we pulled a muscle trying to twist our way through the pretzel logic of it all. At least with the new Spanish version, the names have been changed... if not to protect the innocent, at least to protect what's little left of my sanity.

So here we are with news of a remake of 'Being Human'. Remember 'Being Human'? That's what this post started out with as a topic. According to a report posted by Michael Ausiello of Entertainment Weekly, the three main characters in the American adaptation will be named Aidan (the vampire), Josh (the werewolf) and the ghost will be Molly. In the original series, they are Mitchell, George, and Annie, respectively. And the show will take place in the Boston area.

The one thing that may be hard to reconcile is placing the show in a shared Toobworld timeline with 'True Blood', in which vampires are now able to live openly among humans. With the original series, the splainin is that the Tru-Blood drink hasn't been approved for consumption in Great Britain. With 'Moonlight' from a few years ago, series has been placed on the timeline before Tru-Blood was introduced on the market. (I haven't given much thought to 'The Vampire Diaries'.)

The producers of this new version of 'Being Human' could have mixed up the character revisions a little more, though. It seems like vampires as leading characters are always males. Why couldn't the girl be the vampire, or even the werewolf? And if the ghost was the male, then they could have retained the name of George. Why? First off, as a tip of the hat to 'Topper'. But also they could have then hired T.R. Knight to play the role as his character from 'Grey's Anatomy', the late Dr. George O'Malley......

Alas, he's a character from an ABC show and the new 'Being Human' will be on Syfy. Only in the Toobworld dream-state is such an idea possible....

BCnU!

PS:
I never noticed it before but in that 'Being Human' picture, George the werewolf is standing in front of that globe-shaped light. It gives it the impression of a full moon. Nice touch.....

THE HANSON CAD LINE

Over in Jolly Old TV-UK, Ricky Hanson is the nemesis of retired Detective Jack Halford, mainly because Hanson was responsible for the death of Jack's wife Mary in a deliberate hit and run. Unfortunately, Jack couldn't prove it. But the crime boss was finally sent up and it was all due to Hanson's own son.

It's Toobworld Central's way of thinking that Ricky didn't have great relations with his own father - if he even knew the man whom we believe to be dear old dad: Michael Bennett. Back in 1940, Michael Bennett was in charge of a fuel depot outside Hastings. Despite being married - and having his wife right there with him in the office - Bennett leered at the women driving the tankers and would find any excuse to touch them. Before the month of September, 1940, was out, Bennett had reason to be a bit bolder in his attentions on these younger women, and it's possible one of them returned his affections. Eventually, she might have become pregnant by him, although she more than likely ended up raising the child on her own. If this theory of relateeveety plays out, this girl's last name would have been Hanson. Through Ricky Hanson's son Luke, we might also project the family tree into the 27th Century to find Professor Hobbes - chronicled in Toobworld as taking a tour on the planet "Midnight". Heading in the other direction along the Hanson lineage, Michael Bennett may have been an illegitimate son himself. If so, his father may have been Hurry Fenwick, who was connected to the Royal London Hospital in Whitechapel at the turn of the 20th Century. SHOWS CITED:
'New Tricks'
'Foyle's War'
'Doctor Who'
'Casualty 1909'

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: PRINCE HARRY (AND HIS DAD)

Prince Harry was in New York City this past week; he threw out the first pitch at a Mets game and he played in a charity polo match, where he got thrown from his horse and landed on his royal ass.

Can't think of a better reason than that to feature him in the "As Seen On TV" gallery....

PRINCE HARRY
(Seen here with his father, Prince Charles)

AS SEEN IN:
"Prince William"

AS PLAYED BY:
Eddie Cooper

(Prince Charles was portrayed by Martin Turner)

BCnU!