Monday, June 6, 2022

TVXOHOF BIRTHDAY HONORS LIST - WAREHOUSE 13 (THE LOCATION, NOT THE SHOW)


Usually when I’m inducting a TV series into the Television Crossover Hall of Fame, it is the show’s televersion which is watched by the fictional characters of other TV series.  But this year with my version of the “Birthday Honors List”, it may seem like I’m inducting the show but it’s not the title; it’s the actual location….


WAREHOUSE 13

From Wikipedia:
Warehouse 13 is an American science fiction television series that originally ran from July 7, 2009, to May 19, 2014, on the Syfy network, and was executive produced by Jack Kenny and David Simkins for Universal Cable Productions. Described as "part The X-Files, part Raiders of the Lost Ark and part Moonlighting", the show's blend of science fiction, comedy and drama is said to have borrowed much from the American-Canadian horror television series Friday the 13th: The Series (1987–1990). The program follows a team of field agents who retrieve artifacts that have become charged with energy that can give them dangerous powers if misused. Once retrieved and neutralized, the objects are stored in Warehouse 13, the latest in a line of storehouses with infinite capacity that have served this purpose for millennia.

The series follows U.S. Secret Service Agents Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly) and Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock) when they are assigned to the secretive Warehouse 13 for supernatural artifacts. It is located in a barren landscape in South Dakota, and they initially regard the assignment as punishment. As they go about their assignments to retrieve missing artifacts and investigate reports of new ones, they come to understand the importance of what they are doing. In episode 4 of the first season, they meet Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti), who is searching for her missing brother; in season 2, she joins the team as their technology expert. In episode 1 of season 3, Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore), an Agent from the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives comes aboard.

The series posits that there have been a dozen incarnations of the warehouse before the present-day 13th in South Dakota. Warehouse 1 was built between 336–323 BC on the orders of Alexander the Great as a place to keep artifacts obtained by war. After Alexander died, the warehouse was moved to Egypt, establishing the practice of locating the warehouse in the most powerful empire of the day, under the reasoning that it will be best defended there. Egypt's Ptolemaic rulers appointed a group of people, known as the Regents, to oversee the warehouse and act as its first "agents" and collectors of artifacts. Warehouse 2 lasted until the Roman conquest of Egypt. Other warehouses throughout history include: Warehouse 3 in Western Roman Empire (Italy), Warehouse 4 in Hunnic Empire until the death of Attila the Hun, Warehouse 5 in Byzantine Empire, Warehouse 6 in Cambodia under the Khmer Empire, Warehouse 7 in the Mongol Empire under Genghis Khan, Warehouse 8 in Germany during the Holy Roman Empire (1260–1517), Warehouse 9 in the Ottoman capital of Constantinople until the death of Suleiman the Magnificent, Warehouse 10 in Mughal Empire (India), Warehouse 11 in the Russian Empire under the Romanov Dynasty (the 1812 Napoleonic War with Russia was an attempt to seize control of Warehouse 11), and Warehouse 12 in the United Kingdom from 1830 until 1914. It was during the time of Warehouse 11 that the Regents began to employ agents to gather and protect artifacts. This practice continued under Warehouse 12, with British agents traveling further and further searching for artifacts to add to the collection.

The next move brought the warehouse to South Dakota in the United States. Unlike previous warehouses, which were placed in the centers of their empires, Warehouse 13 was located in a remote area of South Dakota to hide it. The first Warehouse 13 was built in 1898, but the structure burned down because of an insufficient understanding of how to safely store artifacts. The move to the rebuilt and current Warehouse 13 occurred in 1914 at the onset of World War I. The warehouse was designed by Thomas Edison, Nikola Tesla, and M. C. Escher, while the warehouse's expansion joints were created by Albert Einstein.

Originally, artifacts are items connected to some historical or mythological figure or event. Each artifact has been imbued with something from its creator, user, or a major event in history. Some are well known: Studio 54's Disco ball; Lewis Carroll's looking glass, which contains an evil entity called "Alice" that can possess other people's bodies (Myka in Season 1 episode "Duped"), leaving their minds trapped in the mirror; and Edgar Allan Poe's pen and a volume of his writing, which can make whatever the user writes a reality. Some are not: Lizzie Borden had a mirrored compact that today compels users to kill their loved ones with an axe; Marilyn Monroe owned a brush that now turns its user's hair platinum blonde, which Myka once used on herself while under the influence of W. C. Fields' juggling balls that induce drunkenness and blackouts. Others may have humorous effects, such as Ivan Pavlov's bell, which will call any dog to you but causes excessive drooling for 24 hours, and a magic kettle that grants wishes but produces a ferret if the wish is impossible. The artifacts react with electricity and can be neutralized by immersion in a mysterious purple goo or placed inside a neutralizing reflective bag, both produced by Global Dynamics, a research laboratory from Warehouse 13's sister show, Eureka. Artie has also mentioned that ingesting neutralizer will make you "see things". During episode 43 (season 4), Mrs. Frederic shows Claudia an artifact being created—a silver bracelet worn by an ordinary person who exhibits extraordinary courage.

These are just a few of the examples of artifacts which might have come from other TV series.  The trick in searching through the massive artifact list at the wiki is to determine which have authenticated connections and which were created by visitors to the site.  The following summaries are from the Warehouse 13 Wiki….


ABRAHAM LINCOLN’S TOP HAT
When worn, the hat fills the user with the desire to see all African-American people 'freed from the service of their masters', though the definitions of slave and master are rather loosely defined. The wearer will make attempts to step between a black and white person under the excuse of liberating them, regardless of the actual amount of 'liberation' needed. It would seem the hat is either unaware of changes in slavery and racial discrimination laws or is simply unable to change its nature.  Later referenced by Pete Lattimer to Steve Jinks as imbuing the wearer with the overwhelming urge to free nearby African-American people, believing them to be slaves, an impulse which apparently got Pete into hot water with Mrs. Frederic.

TV EPISODE MENTION: First mentioned in a behind-the-scenes video.  I don’t know in which episode Pete made the reference.
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: ‘The Time Tunnel’, ‘The Twilight Zone’, ‘Captains and the Kings’



BRUTUS’ DAGGER
Makes you have the compelling desire to kill your closest friends and confidantes. Person will try persuasion, coercion and conspiracy to finish the task if necessary. The user will then experience tremendous waves of guilt and anguish that can push them to the brink of life and insanity.

TV EPISODE MENTION:  None found so far, but along with the other 22 blades used to kill Caesar, it is listed in the wiki and was too good to pass up because of the connections.
O’Bservation - It would also be multidimensional due to the inclusion of productions of the Shakespeare play, which are all situated in the dimension of Toobstage, unless the production retains its theatrical motif.
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: ‘Rome’, Shakespeare’s “Julius Caesar”, ‘Xena, Warrior Princess’


BABE RUTH’S BASEBALL BAT
Makes objects fly like projectiles.  It is mentioned in the episode “Mild Mannered” as a possible source of the artifact energies.  Alters density to send objects that it strikes flying for the equivalent length of a home run. Surface area and weight appear to have little effect, as the bat seems to only provide more force with unusually shaped objects.

TV EPISODE MENTION: “Mild Mannered”
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: “Babe Ruth”


PERRY COMO’S GOLD RECORD
Like the song it contains, the record is intended to sooth the listener and brighten the atmosphere. It does this by sucking some of the stress from the immediate area into itself. When the record is played, it releases all of the stress and turmoil it has collected.

Artie collected the record after it was played in tribute at Perry Como's funeral. During the ceremony, several attendees suffered from migraines, backaches, alopecia, and full-blown panic attacks. After it was neutralized the artifact was taken back to the Warehouse. In an attempt to reduce tension in the office, Mrs. Frederick instructed Artie to hang the record on the wall.

TV EPISODE MENTION: "A Touch of Fever".  
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: ‘The Perry Como Show’


AGATHA CHRISTIE'S TYPEWRITER
Dame Agatha Mary Clarissa Christie, DBE (born Miller; 15 September 1890 – 12 January 1976) was an English crime novelist, short story writer, and playwright. Agatha Christie’s typewriter predicts crimes 24 hours in advance but has a limited range and never mentions butlers.

It was first seen in "Pilot", and its effects briefly mentioned on the Syfy site.

TV EPISODE MENTION: “Pilot”
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: “Agatha And The Truth Of Murder”


ADOLF HITLER'S MICROPHONE
Orders or statements spoken into the microphone are broadcast over a large space, and have an large amount of influence over those that hear it. Commands or even ideas heard by the listeners will be accepted as true and they will be acted upon immediately. Disturbingly, the darker and more hostile the speech, the more influential it will be. The more the microphone is used, the more power-mad the user becomes, adding a further sinister twist to this unpleasant artifact.

O'Bservation - Contributing to Hitler's overall evil, other factors would include that he was one of the creatures from 'Grimm' and not even the real Hitler anyway.  (He was drowned as an infant and his father took a gypsy baby to replace it as seen in 'The Twilight Zone' continuation.)  Plus, he was often replaced by other men who had fallen foul of a genie whenever they wished to have ultimate power, as seen in the original 'Twilight Zone'.

TV EPISODE MENTION: Mentioned in a podcast with Allison Scagliotti.  (But too good to pass up!)
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: ‘Grimm’


AL CAPONE'S MACHINE GUNS
These Tommy guns were wielded by Capone's men during the events of the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre in 1929, where they shot and killed seven members of a rival gang. Due to their impressive firepower, it is believed Capone lent these guns to his men specifically for the job.

When held, the guns unleash a wild storm of bullets when the trigger is so much as touched. The guns don't stop until either the round is empty or all targets are dead. Noted not to work when separated and, in fact, will not fire at all. Accompanying the guns is a pair of ammo belts that, if worn at the same time, provide the guns with infinite ammunition.

Attracted to the most valuable or high-profile targets. Will curve around worthless drivel to hit anything with a large net worth. Failing that, it shoots at whatever would get the biggest buzz for being shot, such as a rival figure in violent fashion. Otherwise, they just spread uncontrollably in their immediate path.

TV EPISODE MENTION: "Endless Terror"
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: ‘Boardwalk Empire’



ALBERT EINSTEIN'S COMB
By combing it through your hair, it sparks the brain into understanding or conceptualizing concepts that seemed impossible or confusing. Each use seems to spark new understandings, though the static energy released makes hair impossible to tame.

Overuse via addiction to knowledge is possible and attempting to process too much can fry the brain or allow the static to ignite.

TV EPISODE MENTION: "Burnout".
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: ‘Doctor Who’ both in the Classic series (with the Seventh Incarnation) and in “Nu-Who” (with the Eleventh Incarnation.)





B.F. SKINNER'S DIPPY BIRD
During WWII, B. F. Skinner tried to train pigeons to operate bombs. The pigeon would be inserted into a missile with a lens in it. The bird would peck at the target through a screen, thereby guiding the missile. The program was eventually cancelled. This artifact came about as the result of his training and possibly his reinforcement psychology.

Makes pigeons line dance in time with the birds bobbing. Agents are unsure if it works on other birds or only pigeons.

TV EPISODE MENTION: "13.1".
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: ‘Ted Lasso’, ‘Mad Men’, ‘Mission Impossible’, ‘Arrested Development’.  It is a multidimensional artifact as it also appeared in ‘The Simpsons’, and ‘American Dad’.


BILL TODMAN'S PENNY ANTE MACHINE
This "Penny Ante" board was used in the game show, "The Price is Right." Contestants were given three pennies, and were then showed an item with four possible prices. Contestants would need only one penny left to win the game, and if they lost all three pennies after guessing incorrectly, they lost. The machine has four buttons, each of which either lead to a "YES" or a "NO" sign.

When someone presses one of the buttons on the machine, it will turn on and play the classic "Penny Ante" game. The machine compels the player to guess the price of the item that is displayed. Sometimes, the people who are compelled to play the game guess wrong, and as a result they lose one penny. However, there is a 50% chance that the player will have one penny left and win the game. If the player loses, they will be temporarily unable to read prices correctly. If money is not inserted into the machine, then it will compel people to play with it, even if they don't touch the buttons.

TV EPISODE MENTION: As seen on Leena's list in "Parks and Rehabilitation", it requires an extra two cents added to it at regular intervals to keep it 'happy'.
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS: Where else?  ‘The Price Is Right’!


ANNETTE FUNICELLO'S BEACH BALL
Encompassing that "beach party" atmosphere, this ball is known to seek out fun times by the sea. And if it can't find any, it's more than content to make its own. Whenever the ball lands on a solid surface, it transmutes it into fine beach-quality sand. The effects have a bit of a splash zone, but don't affect living organisms. It does, however, affect clothing, and being hit by the ball has a habit of leaving the poor victim in their undergarments. Perfect for a quick dip in the waves.

The ball has yet to be collected. It never stays in the same place for long, and whenever it does it is usually at a beach party where its effects go mostly un-noticed. Reports first surfaced in the early 70s around Florida and continued until the ball was last seen at a 1985 Spring Break rave.

O’Bservation – Something had to happen to trigger one particular beach ball into becoming an artifact.  It could be that one of them appeared in all five of the official Frankie & Annette Beach movies, all of which have been referenced in other TV series.  (A whole episode of ‘Full House’ was dedicated to the genre.)

TV EPISODE MENTION: "3...2...1".
TV SHOW CONNECTIONS:
“Beach Party” – ‘Batman’
“Muscle Beach Party” – ‘WKRP In Cincinnati’
“Bikini Beach” - ‘The Tonight Show’ (with Don Rickles as the guest, talking about being in the third movie – both the talk show and Rickles are in the Hall)
“Beach Blanket Bingo” (This is the movie which has had the most references, which I think is largely due to the title.) – ‘The Mary Tyler Moore Show’, ‘Here’s Lucy’, ‘The Bob Newhart Show’, ‘Silver Spoons’, ‘California Dreams’, ‘Roseanne’, ‘NCIS’, ‘Veronica Mars’, ‘Last Man Standing’, ‘Masters Of Sex’, ‘The Tonight Show’ (again, because Don Rickles was the guest, talking about being in the third movie.  Both the talk show and Rickles are in the Hall)
“How To Stuff A Wild Bikini” – ‘Sabrina The Teenage Witch’, ‘Mama’s Family’

And ‘Full House’, ‘Gilmore Girls’, & ‘Mork & Mindy’ for the overall genre.

So there you have it – my Birthday Honors Inductee, with more than enough examples to qualify “America’s Attic” for inclusion in the TVXOHOF.

Happy birthday to me....

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