TV characters from years past may have long outlived the actors who portrayed them. But the time finally comes when by all realistic measurements of mortality we should make our goodbyes to their memory. (Unless of course they're Time Lords or witches or demi-gods, etc.......)
Here are a few of those TV characters who might have had good reason to be on board the S.S. Poseidon......
PETER STAVROS (CESAR ROMERO) - 'FALCON CREST'
DETECTIVE STAVROS (GEORGE "DEMOSTHENES" SAVALAS) - 'KOJAK'
After he divorced Angela Channing, the matriarch of the Falcon Crest Vineyards, Peter Stavros returned to his native Greece.
But perhaps the holidays this year marked a special time in his life. It could have been his birthday, a landmark year; the anniversary for the founding of his company, perhaps. The cruise was to last a month, so there's plenty of opportunities in that time span for something to crop up.
And in order to celebrate in a grand manner, Peter Stavros might have invited family members from all over the world - even distant cousins such as retired detective Stavros, a poor schlub from New York City's 13th Precinct.
LUCY & RICKY RICARDO (LUCILLE BALL & DESI ARNAZ) - 'I LOVE LUCY' & 'THE LUCY-DESI COMEDY HOUR'
I'd like to think that the marriage of the Ricardos far out-lasted that of the actors who played them. And perhaps Ricky finally succumbed to his wife's plaintive whining that he never took her anywhere - and going down to the club just wasn't going to suffice.
So remembering only the good times from their cruise to Europe, and how it was an ocean cruise to Havana that first brought Lucy into his life, perhaps Ricky sprang for a trip aboard the Poseidon.
He should have probably stayed closer to home on board the Pacific Princess!
After all those years together, Ricky probably figured Lucy had something to do with the ship capsizing. "Lucy! You got some splainin to do!" he'd cry out as the water rose up to their necks.
And just before she'd go under for the last time, Lucy would curl up her lip to make that spidery expression and say, "Ewwwwwwwwwww......"
DR. HARRY WESTON (RICHARD MULLIGAN) - 'EMPTY NEST'
Retired from his Miami practice, and with the probable death of his doofus of a dog Dreyfuss, Dr. Weston might have cajoled his buddy Charley Dietz to set him up with a good deal on an ocean cruise.
If that's how he found himself on board, then maybe Dr. Weston has only himself to blame. After all this time, he should have realized he was only going to get screwed over if Charley was involved.
And if Charley had assured him that the trip would be perfectly safe, it's not his fault. He probably had no choice but to channel his inner Joe Isuzu......
BUFFY DAVIS (ANISSA JONES) - 'FAMILY AFFAIR'
Anissa Jones died from a drug overdose when she was about eighteen years old. That doesn't mean her character of Buffy had to die at the same time, leaving her brother Jody to grieve the loss of his twin. Buffy might have grown up to find love, raise a family, become a success in the corporate world, sue Mr. French for abuse.
But there's no guarantee a TV character will live to a ripe old age off-screen. And eventually Buffy Davis might have met a sad end just like the actress who portayed her so many years ago.
The only difference would be that Buffy had no choice over how she died.......
BARNABY JONES (BUDDY EBSEN) - 'BARNABY JONES'
Here's another example of a TV character long retired who might have been on board the Poseidon to enjoy his golden years. (See the last post re: Charlie Hume and Miss Ellie.)
But Barnaby Jones might have been on the case. If the Riddler was on the ship in hopes of making a big score (Again, see the last post.), maybe the gray panther gumshoe was hot on his trail.
TED BAXTER (TED KNIGHT) - 'THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW'
There are two compelling reasons as to why I would never consider the former anchorman for WJM in Minneapolis for inclusion on the SS Poseidon.
First off, I'd like to think that despite being "such a boob", I think Ted would have been still married to Georgette Franklin. And as played by Georgia Engel, Georgette was so sweet and so "damned nice" that I would hate to think she perished at sea as well. And who knows? If there is ever yet another reunion movie for 'The Mary Tyler Moore Show', Georgette Franklin Baxter might show up in it as a widow, as Simka Gravas did in an episode of 'The Tony Danza Show'.
The second reason why Ted Baxter probably wasn't on board the SS Poseidon?
He's too cheap to have paid for the trip.
Okay, I've got a few more ideas about the passenger manifest for 'The Poseidon Adventure'.