FUTURE FETAL POSITION

'Defying Gravity', which has been described online as 'Grey's Astronomy' and as '"Lost"... In Space', is proving to be a week by week viewing option for me. These next two weeks will determine whether or not I stick with it.

But the show has provided a new entry on the Toobworld timeline: at some point before September, 2052, (when 'Defying Gravity' begins), Roe v. Wade will be overturned and abortion will once again be illegal.

Long before 2052 gets here in the real world, I will have faked my own death and assumed a new identity in order to mask my immortality. In order that I won't be tracked down, I will have to sever my ties to the Toobworld concept and no longer toil as a televisiologist. So it won't matter to me if this proves to be a Zonk or not. Just as near-future speculation about the 'Star Trek' entries to the timeline will prove irrelevant, because there won't be a Toobworld Central by then.

For now, a future Toobworld in which abortion is illegal makes for interesting speculation about what might happen in the real world.....

BCnU!

ZONKS: LEVERAGE OVER THE OUTER LIMITS

'Leverage'
"The Three Days Of The Hunter Job"

When Monica Hunter had her on-air breakdown on BNI, Alec Hardison seized control of the onscreen graphics transmission to help seal the deal. Chuckling to himself from his secret location, Hardison said: "Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission. We control the horizontal. We control the vertical."

Of course, we know he was paraphrasing the "Control Voice" narration during the opening credits of the classic series 'The Outer Limits'. But within the reality of Toobworld, he was just making rhetorical statements which he knew the BNI news director couldn't hear.

No Zonk!

BCnU!

A SPLAININ FOR "SPLAININ"

During one of their 'Warehouse 13' cases, former Secret Service agent Pete Latimer said to his partner, Mika Barry: "Lucy, you got some splaining to do."

I doubt there's a person on Earth who doesn't know the origins of that line. Cuban-born band-leader Ricky Ricardo would say that to his wife whenever he found out that Lucy had been up to her usual shenanigans.

We can keep the "Inner Toobworld" connected to 'I Love Lucy' and yet still remain Zonk-free. It's pozz'ble, just pozz'ble, that Ricky Ricardo eventually wrote a book about his "Life with Lucy", and he chose that phrase to be its title. Within the realm of Toobworld, the autobiography of a "Cuban Pete" might seem to be an acquired taste, but Pete Latimer is the type of guy who would acquire it.

Chic-chic-a-boom, Chic-chic-a-boom, Chic-chic-a-boom !

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: A TOOBWORLD CALAMITY

I'm leaving on vacation tomorrow for two weeks. During that time there will be automatic postings of the "As Seen On TV" showcase, featuring historical Western figures as seen in episodes of 'Stories Of The Century'. (There will also be two new members of the TV Crossover Hall of Fame, and maybe a small tribute to "The Wizard Of Oz" on the 70th anniversary of its first general release.

In the meantime, here's the "As Seen On TV" showcase for Saturday, another two-fer:

CALAMITY JANE

AS SEEN IN:
'Bonanza'

AS PLAYED BY:
Stefanie Powers

CALAMITY JANE

AS SEEN IN:
'Deadwood'

AS PLAYED BY:
Robin Weigert

According to one 'Bonanza' fansite, the general consensus for the show's timeline is that every episode takes place 100 years prior. So "Calamity Over The Comstock", which was first broadcast in 1963, took place in 1863. The storyline for 'Deadwood' began in 1876, so we have a 13 year span between these two appearances of Martha Jane Canary, AKA Calamity Jane.Time takes its toll, but considering her combative nature and hard-livin' ways, Jane probably had her facial features altered through a series of fist-fights and other kinds of brawls during that time.

BCnU!

MY LIFE IN NUMBERS

Back from a trip to midtown.

On the subway, I sat across a kid with a punkish skateboarder t-shirt with a huge "23" emblazoned over the heart area.

Changing at Columbus Circle for the local, I was standing next to a guy wearing a #8 jersey for some New York team.

When I got out of my union's building, there was a guy on the corner with a large "42" on the back of his football jersey.

Kept looking for a "4", a "15", and a "16", but came up a cropper. I think the Fates were toying with me because there was a nutjob on the subway ride home wearing a "56" jersey. It's probably what drove him crazy.

Numbers running!

BCnU!

LADY GOALDIVA

And for those who don't like Toobworld Theory, there's Sport.....



Longtime readers of "Inner Toob" will know how much I dislike reality TV, but this is something I could sink my teeth into!

[Thanks to Ken Levine for pointing this out.]

BCnU!

THE HAT SQUAD: JOHN QUADE

You couldn't say that this was a face only a mother could love - 71 year old John Quade, who died in his sleep Sunday of natural causes, leaves behind six children and ten grand-children. So there was always somebody who loved him. And that would include the many fans of the character actor, probably best known for the biker he played in two Clint Eastwood movies, "Every Which Way But Loose" and "Any Which Way You Can". (But for me, it's "High Plains Drifter".)

The obits I've seen online so far list his performance as Sheriff Biggs as his biggest contribution to Toobworld. That may be so, but it gives short shrift to the many other characters he played over the years on TV. Here's a rundown:

TV SERIES
"Lucky Luke" .... Lucky Luke's sidekick

"Return to Lonesome Dove" (1993) .... Martin

"On the Air" .... Billy 'The Ear' Mulkahey

"Baywatch" .... Kyle Rigler

"Hunter" .... Jim Holloway

"Werewolf" .... Mulligan

Werewolf (Pilot) .... Storage Shed Owner

"Crime Story" .... Captain

"Dream West" .... Big Fallon

"The A-Team" .... Garber & McKaydoo (two characters)

"Hill Street Blues" .... Sal Intestinale

"Manimal"

"The Fall Guy" .... Roland & Foyle (two different episodes)

"CBS Children's Mystery Theatre": Dirkham Detective Agency .... Frankie

"CBS Afternoon Playhouse": The Shooting .... Toad

"Quincy M.E." .... Pawnshop Owner

"Palmerstown, U.S.A." .... Luke Spears

"CHiPs" .... Reno

"Galactica 1980" .... Sheriff Ellsworth

"B.J. and the Bear" .... Taker

"CBS Library": Animal Talk .... Matthewson

"The Yeagers" .... Roy

"Paris" .... Lupo

"The Dukes of Hazzard" .... Augie Detweiller

"Vega$" .... Dominic & Hugh (two different episodes)

"Buck Rogers in the 25th Century" .... Jolen Quince

"Flatbush" .... Clean Otto

"How the West Was Won" .... Waddie Travers

"Sword of Justice" .... Lt Ellis

"Baretta" .... Schreiber

"Police Woman" .... Ganz & Willy

"Charlie's Angels" .... Brown

"The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries" .... Sheriff

"The Bionic Woman" .... Hawkins

"Starsky and Hutch" .... Vic Humphries

"Roots" .... Sheriff Biggs

"McCloud" .... Merle Koska & Pete Stern (two different episodes)

"The Quest" .... Neeley

"Kojak" .... Colby

"Switch" .... Sheriff

"Police Story" .... Redneck

"The Rockford Files" .... Tenner

"Get Christie Love!"

"Kung Fu" .... Johnson

"Chopper One" .... Brandt

"McMillan & Wife" .... Doorman

"Faraday and Company" .... Hooper

"Roll Out" .... Cook

The Blue Knight .... Knobby Booker

"Dusty's Trail" .... Jake

"Ironside" .... Johnny Andrews

"Nichols" .... Scully

"Bearcats!" .... Brady

"Bonanza" .... Tallman & Telegrapher

"Cade's County" .... Mule Mueller

"Gunsmoke" .... Shaw

"The High Chaparral" .... Bartender

"The Wild Wild West" .... Man

TV MOVIES
Unconquered

The Tracker .... Lomax

Longarm

The Highwayman .... Bartender

Houston: The Legend of Texas .... Sen. Stansbury

The B.R.A.T. Patrol .... Knife

Seasons in the Sun .... Gordie Vickers

No Man's Land .... Henry Lambert

Big Bend Country .... Hart

Trouble in High Timber Country .... Roy

Power .... Loading Dock Foreman

Go West, Young Girl .... Ingalls

Peter Lundy and the Medicine Hat Stallion .... Adam

The Ghost of Flight 401 .... Marshall

Escape from Bogen County .... Sheriff Mason

Night Terror .... Old Derelict

Last Hours Before Morning .... Korbett

The Godchild .... Denton

The Virginia Hill Story.... Mousie

Planet Earth .... Kreeg Commandant

Honky Tonk

Of Men and Women .... (segment "Margie Passes")

Goodnight, My Love .... Edgar

As you can see, a lot of Westerns and hard-boiled detective shows in the mix, but even a couple of sci-fi roles as well as a few sitcoms. And he wasn't always the bad guy; there are a few sheriffs among his roles. (Granted, not all of them were on the right side of the Law.)

Quade was in high demand in the seventies and it's reflected by the high calibre shows he appeared in: 'Rockford Files', 'Kojak', 'Kung Fu', etc....

And there's even a blipvert in which his role was so colorful and over the top, that he stole it away from not only John Philip Law but also Lee Van Cleef!



The great character actors are born, and having that right look is key. Luckily, John Quade didn't just have that to rely on; he was a good actor as well. And his loss will be felt by all character actor connoisseurs.

BCnU......

AS SEEN ON TV: WYATT EARP, A 43 YEAR SPAN

As the time for my vacation draws nigh, I figured I'd close out the week with a couple of Western "two-fers" for the "As Seen On TV" showcase.

For Friday:

WYATT EARP
Spring, 1877

AS SEEN IN:
'Deadwood'

AS PLAYED BY:
Gale Harold

WYATT EARP

Summer, 1920

AS SEEN IN:
"The Adventures Of Young Indiana Jones: Hollywood Follies"

AS PLAYED BY:
Leo Gordon

Trespassing into the movie universe for a moment, I always figured that a nice double-bill would be "Hour Of The Gun" and "Sunset" for the same reason - James Garner played Wyatt Earp in both, at two different points in his personal timeline.....

BCnU!

THE HAT SQUAD: LES PAUL

Les Paul was a giant with the guitar, both as a player and as an innovator; back in the late 1980's, I wanted him to have that big hurrah in the spotlight as the Pappy for the Traveling Wilburys.

We're saluting him at Toobworld Central because he was a television star as well, a member of the League of Themselves with his wife Mary Ford. They appeared in five minute segments sponsored by Listerine; two of which are featured below. There's also a 3-part appearance on a variety show as well.











Its a shame we never find out in that clip why Les Paul had the string around his finger.

As Red Skelton would say, "Good night, and may God bless."

BCnU.....

"GUNSMOKE" GOES TO THE MOVIES

CBS Films is developing a feature film prequel about Marshall Matt Dillon of 'Gunsmoke'. It'll be produced by Craig Baumgarten and the screenplay will be from Gregory Poirier (best known for "National Treasure: Book of Secrets".)

As a prequel, it will show how Matt Dillon became the man we knew him to be in Dodge City. According to the news story, "it will be set in the same American West as the original but will feature a contemporary look and modern action twists".

That alone gives me a sinking feeling.

Movies made from TV shows are a mixed bag. For Toobworld, the best are those that are usually sequels and use the original actors; they serve as cinematic extensions of the TV series. The 1966 "Batman", the "Star Trek" franchise (including the latest reboot), and even Mel Gibson's "Maverick" (because of a plot twist at the end) - these are the best examples.

I've even appreciated the remakes that are entirely recast and sometimes don't even bear any resemblance to the originals: "The Addams Family", "Starsky & Hutch", "The Brady Bunch", and "Batman" from 1989 (which should be set in the alternate Toobworld of the series 'Birds Of Prey').

But for the most part, movie remakes are an affront to the TV Universe: "Sgt. Bilko", "McHale's Navy", and my personal pick for the very worst - "The Wild, Wild West".

The ones that really just make me sad are those that involve appearances by original cast members, as if to give their blessing - "Car 54, Where Are You?", "My Favorite Martian", and the aforementioned "McHale's Navy". ("Starsky & Hutch" and "Dragnet" get a pass on this point.)

As the movie version of 'Gunsmoke' is supposed to be a prequel, it's going to get a pass on the recastaways for Matt, Doc, and Miss Kitty. At least it's splained away as was the case with the new "Star Trek" with their alternate universe timeline. But as to whether it will be accepted into the TV Universe of Toobworld?

I'll have to see it before I pronounce judgement.

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: SAM BASS

As outlaw train robber Sam Bass is not only our "As Seen On TV" showcase for Thursday, but also this week's inductee into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame, I thought it fitting that we see him in action, as portrayed by Don Haggerty in an episode of 'Stories Of The Century' (probably the most boring title I've ever seen for a TV show, especially a Western!)

Now don't think I'm going to do this for any of the other Western characters from 'Stories Of The Century' who'll be appearing in the "As Seen On TV" feature over the next few weeks.... That would be too much work, which goes against the whole idea of being on vacation!

SAM BASS (PART ONE)


SAM BASS (PART TWO)


SAM BASS (PART THREE)


BCnU!

TVXOHOF, 08/2009-B: SAM BASS

Today's "As Seen On TV" showcase is a sneak peek at what you can expect while I'm off on vacation. I've already set up the feature to run automatically each day and the theme, besides being about historical Western figures, will be those characters as seen on a barely remembered series, 'Stories Of The Century'.

So for today, here's an example: Sam Bass...... AS SEEN IN:
'Stories Of The Century'

AS PLAYED BY:
Don Haggerty

From Wikipedia:
Sam Bass (21 July 1851 in Mitchell, Indiana - 21 July 1878 in Round Rock, Texas) was a nineteenth-century American train robber and outlaw.

After failing at a series of legitimate enterprises, Bass turned to crime. He formed a gang and robbed the Union Pacific gold train from San Francisco on September 18, 1877, looting $60,000 - to this day the largest single robbery of the Union Pacific.

Bass and his gang staged a string of robberies, yet never netted over $500 at any one time. In 1878, they held up two stagecoaches and four trains within twenty-five miles of Dallas and became the object of a manhunt by Pinkerton Agents and by a special company of the Texas Rangers headed by Captain Junius Peak.

Bass was able to elude the Rangers until a member of his gang, Jim Murphy, turned informant. John B. Jones was informed of Bass's movements, and set up an ambush at Round Rock Texas, where Bass planned to rob the Williamson County Bank.

On 19 July 1878, Bass and his gang were scouting the area before the robbery. When they bought some tobacco at a store, they were noticed by Deputy Sheriff A. W. Grimes. When Grimes approached the men to request that they surrender their sidearms, he was shot and killed.

As he attempted to flee, Bass was shot by Ranger George Herold. He was found lying in a pasture by a group of railroad workers, who summoned the authorities. He was taken into custody and died the next day. Bass was buried in Round Rock. His original headstone is kept at the Round Rock Public Library.

In 1954, he was portrayed by Don Haggerty in an episode of the syndicated western television series Stories of the Century. Haggerty was forty when he played the doomed 27-year-old Bass.

Here's a list of the actors who portrayed Bass:

John Anderson . . . "Trackdown" (1957)
{End of an Outlaw (#1.9)}

Jack Chaplain . . . "Outlaws" (1960)
{Sam Bass (#1.23)}

Chuck Connors . . . "Tales of Wells Fargo" (1957)
{Sam Bass (#1.10)}

Don Haggerty . . . "Stories of the Century" (1954)
{Sam Bass (#1.7)}

Alan Hale Jr. . . . "Colt .45" (1957)
{The Saga of Sam Bass (#2.7)}

Kelly Thordsen . . . "Maverick" (1957)
{Full House (#3.7)}

Lee Van Cleef . . . The Slowest Gun in the West (1960)

Frank Wolff . . . "Wagon Train" (1957)
{The Maggie Hamilton Story (#3.26)}

And because he's been played on TV so many times, we're inducting Sam Bass into the TV Crossover Hall Of Fame as the historical figure for the month of August.

BCnU!

HAPPY 70th, "THE WIZARD OF OZ"!

Today marked the 70th anniversary of "The Wizard Of Oz" premiere in Oconomowoc, Wisconsin. There was a spate of tributes in TV advertising earlier this year, which I blogged about here and here........

The greatest movie of all Time. Why? Because it had color, black & white, drama, comedy, singing and dancing, and flying monkeys!

BCnU!

A MUNCHKIN OF A POST....

Check out this post from my blog-buddy Ivan, about today's very special anniversary:

Edward Copeland on Film: “There’s no place like home…”

PROMOTING FELLOWSHIP

My favorite line from the Comedy Central "Roast of Joan Rivers":

"What a night!

A couple of trolls, a fairy, and a giant -

all going after a sunken-eyed little monster

who's obsessed with jewelry....

It's like 'The Lord Of The Rings'!"

Greg Giraldo

BCnU!

SOUL MUSING

In Toobworld, where reincarnation is an established fact, a soul that was born to rerun usually repeats traits down through the generations. My favorite example of (unproven) reincarnation would be that of the soul of the Roman Emperor Claudius, reborn as Chicago psychiatrist Robert Hartley. (The stutter for one example, and the fact that those around him didn't take him seriously enough.) Another example would be the aristocratic Ross Poldark and his gypsy bride Demelza, reunited centuries later as San Francisco blue-blood Greg Montgomery and free spirit Dharma Liberty Finkelstein.

But for a soul to be reincarnated, the previous body housing it would have to die. Seems to be a given. But could a soul be splintered, so that pieces of it are reincarnated at the same time?

Having just seen the latest movie in the franchise, I know there is One Whom I Must Not Name who split his own soul to house the pieces in secret hiding places. But that's the universes of Literature and Cinema, not Television (unless he showed up in Skitlandia).

I'm talking about a soul split at least in half, being reborn at the same time.

I think we now have an example of this.
In this past Sunday's 'Law & Order: Criminal Intent' episode "Revolution", Birgit Kaspers was a young woman whose father had stolen her away as an infant from her birth parents. By the end of the episode, Birgit was killed in front of her "father" during a tense stand-off.

Back in 2004, (according to the Toobworld timeline, that is - we saw it happen years later in the real world), a similar situation occurred....
Alex Linus was a young woman who was also raised by a man who stole her away as an infant from her mother. Ben Linus raised Alex on a mysterious island in the South Pacific, only to see her gunned down in a tense stand-off after she was taken hostage.

Reincarnated souls don't necessarily have to look alike, although it has happened before (especially in the case of the Simon brothers Rick and AJ). In this case, Alex and Birgit, without any reason to believe that they were cousins, identical cousins, also looked eerily similar to each other. (Of course, in the real world, this is helped greatly by the fact that both Birgit and Alex were played by the same actress - Tania Raymonde.)

ALEX LINUS

BIRGIT KASPERS

As to who that splintered soul was in a previous life? We'd have to search through hundreds of TV shows to find someone who might have lived and died under similar circumstances - and in such a violent way that the soul was sundered in two.

You're welcome to look.....

SHOWS CITED:
'Law & Order: Criminal Intent'
'Lost'
'Simon & Simon'
'I, Claudius'
'The Bob Newhart Show'
'Poldark'
'Dharma & Greg'

BCnU!

CSI: CROSSOVER SERIES INTENT

Laurence Fishburne doesn't seem to be gaining any fans since he arrived on the scene in the mothership of the 'CSI' franchise. (TV.com has a list of Top Ten TV characters that should be killed off, and his character of Dr. Raymond Langston makes the cut!)

So it appears the producers are going to goose his visibility with the hopes it will lead to acceptance - by having Dr. Langston appear in all three series over the course of one week this fall.

So with his appearances in this crossover of 'CSI', 'CSI: Miami', and 'CSI: NY', Dr. Raymond Langston will be eligible for inclusion in the TV Crossover Hall of Fame.

At the very least, it's one form of TV immortality.....

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: JOHN FORD

And now for something a little different, the "As Seen On TV" showcase features a man whose name was synonymous with the American West - at least as seen in the movies.

JOHN FORD

AS SEEN IN:
"The Adventures Of Young Indiana Jones: Hollywood Follies"

AS PLAYED BY:
Stephen Caffrey

Indiana Jones encountered John Ford in the summer of 1920, when he was hired by Irving Thalberg to keep explosive director Erich Von Stroheim under control and within the budget. I'm not sure if the name of the movie being directed by Ford was mentioned in the TV movie, but it had to be one of these (depending how fast they could be churned out by the movie studio):

"Desperate Trails" (1921)
"The Wallop" (1921)
"The Freeze-Out" (1921)
"The Big Punch" (1921)
"Just Pals" (1920)
"Hitchin' Posts" (1920) BCnU!

THE HAT SQUAD: EUNICE KENNEDY SHRIVER

From the New York Times:

Eunice Kennedy Shriver, a member of one of the most prominent families in American politics and a trailblazer in the effort to improve the lives of people with intellectual disabilities, died early Tuesday morning at Cape Cod Hospital in Hyannis, Mass. She was 88.

Her death, at 2 a.m., was confirmed by her family in a statement. A family friend said that Mrs. Shriver had been in declining health for months, having suffered a series of strokes.

A sister of President John F. Kennedy and Senators Robert F. Kennedy and Edward M. Kennedy and the mother-in-law of Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger of California, Mrs. Shriver never held elective office. Yet she was no stranger to Capitol Hill, and some view her work on behalf of the developmentally challenged, including the founding of the Special Olympics, as the most lasting of the Kennedy family’s contributions.
In connection with her family ties, Eunice Kennedy Shriver was portrayed several times on television:

Joanne Camp
. . . "Kennedy" (1983)

Rosanne Covy
. . . Young Joe, the Forgotten Kennedy (1977)

Alyssa Gebert (age 3)
. . . J.F.K.: Reckless Youth (1993)

Melody Johnson (age 13)
. . . J.F.K.: Reckless Youth (1993)

Tamsin Kelsey
. . . Jackie, Ethel, Joan: The Women of Camelot (2001)

Nancy McClure
. . . J.F.K.: Reckless Youth (1993)

Elizabeth Norment
. . . "Robert Kennedy & His Times" (1985)

Johanna Nutter
. . . Jackie Bouvier Kennedy Onassis (2000)

Halina Radosz
. . . "The Kennedys of Massachusetts" (1990)

Fiona Reed
. . . The Loretta Claiborne Story (2000)

I just wish I could be sure that the pictures accompanying this tribute are of Joanne Camp from the mini-series 'Kennedy'. Unfortunately, she wasn't properly identified within the storyline, and so these could be of Pat Lawford or Jean Smith. I apologize if an error was made......

BCnU.....
“When the full judgment of the Kennedy legacy is made — including J.F.K.’s Peace Corps and Alliance for Progress, Robert Kennedy’s passion for civil rights and Ted Kennedy’s efforts on health care, workplace reform and refugees — the changes wrought by Eunice Shriver may well be seen as the most consequential.”
U.S. News and World Report, Nov. 15, 1993.

THE LIFE OF RILEY

On 'Nurse Jackie', when Eddie (the pharmacist at All Saints Hospital in TV-NYC) found out that Coop's girl friend had given him flowers, Eddie told the doctor that he was leading the life of Riley. Coop didn't understand the reference.

I probably shouldn't even have bothered writing this up. Most people know that it's a slang term for "a soft easy life, a pleasant way of living".

Here's the etymology for the phrase:

~It is said that this expression originated in the 1880s from a song called, "Is that Mr. Reilly?". The song contained lyrics such as "a hundred a day would be my pay", and other comedic speculation about what "Mr. Reilly" would do if he were to become wealthy. The earliest recorded citation for "life of Reilly", however, is in 1919, where the "life of Reilly" is referred to in another song, "...but I'm living the life of Reilly just the same..."~ So it never has to have anything to do with the old TV show (first starring Jackie Gleason, and then William Bendix) nor the radio show that preceded it. And besides, that show is so old, most of today's audiences don't even remember it - or even heard of it in the first place!

BCnU!

PICTURES OF LILLIE

In connection to our salute to the two official portrayals of Lillie Langtry, here a couple of musical tributes to both her incarnations which I found on YouTube.

First up:

Lillie Langtry and Oscar Wilde, as seen in 'Lillie':



And here's Lillie with Julian, as seen in 'Kindred: The Embraced':



BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: THE JERSEY LILY

LILLIE LANGTRY

AS SEEN IN:
'Lillie'

AS PLAYED BY:
Francesca Annis

LILLIE LANGTRY

AS SEEN IN:
'Kindred: The Embraced'

AS PLAYED BY:
Stacy Haiduk

This is an interesting case study for a "Two For Tuesday" feature, in that these two recastaways can remain in Earth Prime-Time and not have one of them jettisoned to an alternate TV dimension. (On the other hand, Jennie Seagrove's portrayal of the "Jersey Lily" would be in a different Toobworld, especially as it's a TV movie in which Christopher Lee and Patrick Macnee play Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson.)

Francesca Annis, having her own mini-series as Lillie Langtry, is automatically the face of the chanteuse for Toobworld - especially as she also portrayed the role in a mini-series about 'Edward The Seventh'. But we can also claim that Stacy Haiduk was the same woman - after she was embraced into the world of the Undead. Life as a vampire must have changed certain of her physical features, which account for the change in appearance. (And we can always claim that she had work done afterwards; I don't think that's ever been considered in novels or films, has it? Plastic surgery for vampires?)

"If you let me,
I would show you I'm more real than the goddess you imagine."
'Lillie'

Here's a thumbnail sketch of Lillie Langtry's biography, from Wikipedia:

Lillie Langtry (13 October 1853 – 12 February 1929), born Emilie Charlotte Le Breton, was a highly successful British actress born on the island of Jersey. A renowned beauty, she was nicknamed the "Jersey Lily" and had a number of prominent lovers, including the future King Edward VII.

At the suggestion of one of her close friends, Oscar Wilde, Lillie embarked upon a stage career. In December 1881, she made her debut before the London public in "She Stoops to Conquer" at the Haymarket Theatre. The following autumn, she made her first tour of America, an enormous success, which she repeated in subsequent years, though the critics generally condemned her interpretations of roles such as Pauline in the "Lady of Lyons" or Rosalind in "As You Like It". In 1903, she starred in America in "The Crossways", written by her in collaboration with J. Hartley Manners. She returned to America in 1906 and again in 1912, appearing in vaudeville.

In 1897, Langtry became an American citizen, and divorced her husband the same year in Lakeport, California. She had purchased a winery with an area of 4,200 acres (17 km2) in Lake County, California in 1888 which produced red wine. She sold it in 1906. The winery and vineyard are still in operation.

Langtry died in Monaco in 1929, and was buried in the graveyard of St. Saviour's Church in Jersey – the church of which her father had been rector.

Of course, in Toobworld, reports of her death were highly exagerrated.

Here's a description of how she was "embraced" into the world of vampirism:

"Among Lillie's admirers was the one who was to become her Sire. An old Toreador had seen Lillie in her performance as Rosalind, and fell in love with the English beauty. The Toreador followed Lillie wherever she went, a silient patron at her every performance. His obsession with her soon overpowered him. Embracing her on the stage of the empty theater. Lillie went on to be a greater sensation, reveling in the Toreador abilities she acquired. After her second husband died, Lillie sold the theater, and moved to America with her Sire, joining various small theater groups. Lillie finally settled down in San Francisco in 1920, where she met Julian Luna. Her Sire finally moved on..seeing her happy, and it is rumored that he was killed while acting in Berlin during World War II. During the 1970's, Lillie purchased an old warehouse, and converted it into a nightclub for Kindred and Kine alike, calling it "THE HAVEN", where she manages it, while living at Julian's Mansion."

And here's the reason why she's included in our salute to historical Western characters during the month of August:

The town of Langtry, Texas, was not named for her, although its most illustrious inhabitant, Judge Roy Bean, was an ardent admirer, naming the saloon where he held court "The Jersey Lily". Bean himself spread the rumor about the town's name. He also built an opera house in anticipation of a visit, and Mrs. Langtry appeared there after Bean's death. The town was named for railroad supervisor George Langtry. (This odd "relationship" was also featured in the feature films "The Westerner" and "The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean".)

As the leader of the Toreador clan in San Francisco, Lillie Langtry is the one historical Western figure who is still aliv- er, "active" in Toobworld..... BCnU!

"Toreador. We're the sexy ones.
We like to entertain."

"The Toreador clan are artists.

Like any artist, we want our creation to last forever."
'Kindred: The Embraced'

NUMBERS RUNNING: ROOM FOR RAPP

In the 'Monk' episode "Mr. Monk's Favorite Show', Christine Rapp was a former child actress who wrote a tell-all autobiography - for which she was apparently receiving death threats. Adrian Monk suggested that she should check into a motel under an assumed name until the case could be solved.

At the Safari Inn, the desk clerk assigned her a room at the top of the outside stairwell. And the number of that room?

"8" - one of "The Numbers" in the sequence from 'Lost'!
BCnU!

"FRINGE": OVER THERE

Here's that final scene from the first season finale of 'Fringe'.

(Don't you love alliteration?)



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ACROSS THE VIEW-NIVERSE

Before 'Sliders' came along, Toobworld usually only had one alternate "reality" to deal with - that of the evil mirror universe made most famous in 'Star Trek' (and expanded in 'Star Trek: Deep Space Nine'). And then 'Sliders' gave us the possibility of hundreds, even thousands, of alternate dimensions to visit.

But 'Fringe', which had FBI Agent Olivia Dunham jump from one dimension to another (where the Twin Towers still stand), will only concern itself with those two versions of Toobworld.

"We're only going to tell a story about two: here and what we're referring to internally as 'over there,'" says producer Jeff Pinkner. "But they are two versions of reality. It's not time travel."

Most of the show will take place in the dimension of Earth Prime-Time, "though what's happening over there will impact what's happening over here."

As for the use of the World Trade Center in the first season finale, which O'Bviously could have upset a lot of viewers, Pinkner said they decided it was an "honest way to represent that there's a different earth and a different New York."

And in the greater scope of Toobworld, the existence of other TV realities - with access to them - is another example that one of the quirks of the Tenth incarnation of the Doctor is that he's a liar. Since the two-part 'Doctor Who' story re-introducing the Cybermen, the Gallifreyan has been insisting that only the Time Lords have the power to cross the dimensional veil; and that since they're all dead, the vortices - especially the one leading to Rose's new homeworld - are closed off forever. (Of course, by the fourth season finale, we saw that Rose showed that up for the lie it is!)

BCnU!

PS:

The Twin Towers were inducted into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame in November of 2001......

AS SEEN ON TV: THE JAMES GANG

JESSE & FRANK JAMES
[with Exigius 12½, a Martian]

AS SEEN IN:
'My Favorite Martian'

AS PLAYED BY:
Mort Mills (Jesse James)
L.Q. Jones (Frank James)

There are two ways to go to splain the presence of these two men as the James boys in Toobworld, when so many other actors have played the role as well.

1] When Tim O'Hara and Uncle Martin traveled back in Time and came into contact with Frank and Jesse, they were in an alternate timeline. So when the outlaws were brought forward into the "Future" of the mid-1960's, they were in the timeline of Earth Prime-Time, not their own.

2] Jesse and Frank James had such reputations as outlaws, many other wannabe's assumed their identities in order to advance their own criminal careers. These two gunslingers could instead be characters played by Mills and Jones in other TV Westerns. And let's face it, both actors have plenty of nefarious cowboys in their resumes to choose from! (Another who pulled this stunt back in the wild, wild West was a Charles Dickens impersonator as seen in an episode of 'Bonanza'.)

I rather prefer the latter splainin. It can be expanded to include other portrayals of Frank and Jesse in other TV series and TV movies. With that first splainin, it doesn't take into account why they still look diferent from the James Gangers in other TV dimensions. (Basically, although their names remained the same, their DNA combinations were off for one reason or another at the time of conception.)

BCnU!

PS:
Exigius 12½ (as played by Ray Walston) was inducted into the TV Crossover Hall Of Fame in October of 2001.

08/09 TV

Several historical events on the Ninth of August have made their mark in Toobworld in some way, either in being depicted in TV movies and mini-series, or by involving people who have been depicted in Toobworld.

Here are the ones that jumped out at me while perusing a list in Wikipedia:

1902 – Edward VII is crowned king of the United Kingdom.

1944 – The United States Forest Service and the Wartime Advertising Council release posters featuring Smokey Bear for the first time.

1945 – World War II: Nagasaki is devastated when an atomic bomb, "Fat Man", is dropped by the United States B-29 Bockscar. 70,000 people are killed instantly.

1969 – Members of a cult led by Charles Manson brutally murder pregnant actress Sharon Tate (wife of Roman Polanski), coffee heiress Abigail Folger, Polish actor Wojciech Frykowski, men's hairstylist Jay Sebring, and recent high-school graduate Steven Parent.

1974 – As a direct result of the Watergate scandal, Richard Nixon becomes the first President of the United States to resign from office. His Vice President, Gerald Ford, becomes president.

This video, although it took place the day before, sums up the resignation of Nixon:



BCnU!

JUST BECAUSE....

MONK 2 MONK

I just emailed this to David Bianculli of "TV Worth Watching" (link to the left!) for his collection of TV in-jokes, so don't get any ideas! In "Mr. Monk's Favorite Show", Monk found a collection of discarded ballots from the "Silver Globe" awards for Best Supporting Actress In A Made For TV Movie.

One of the actresses listed was Christine Rapp, who was a character in that episode (played by Elizabeth Perkins). But as for the other names on the ballot, most of them have connections to the show as well.

Tara McSherry is a production assistant on the series, while Tyna Hurd is the production accountant. The only one I couldn't find any information about was Yasmine Marutyan; came up blank on her.

The last of the five names is interesting - Kendra Frank. I found no listing for her in the IMDb.com, but a Google search showed that "Kendra Frank" was a character in the episode where "Mr. Monk Goes To A Rock Concert". (She was a roadie and girl-friend for the murder victim.) If there is a real Kendra Frank, maybe she's connected to the writer or somebody else on the production team.......

So whoever Kendra Frank is in the real world, within the realm of Toobworld, Kendra Frank serves as an inner link between the two episodes of 'Monk'.

Most likely, the TV movie for which Kendra was nominated (and this is where I wish I had an HD TV set!) was probably the pinnacle of her success in front of the cameras. When her career began to fade, rather than giving up show business altogether, Kendra Frank got involved in the world of rock 'n' roll, becoming a roadie for the band Trafalgar. This is how she got romantically involved with the roadie known as Stork, the murder victim of that earlier 'Monk' episode.

See? Even the most minor of roles in TV have lives beyond their moments on screen....

BCnU!