THE MAILING TOOB

"'I say what I think' is another way of saying:
'I'm an asshole'."
Dr. Foreman
'House'

Present company excluded, of course!
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A few weeks back, Bobt wrote about a child in his school who was asked what a duck says. The child's reply? "AFLAC!"

I used the story as an illustration of the power TV has over us.....

Toby: did you see the cartoon “Family Circus” in today’s paper? They must read tubeworld!!
Bob T
My Blog www.bobturba.com/blog

As it turned out, a week or so later, the "Family Circus" comic strip had the exact same story!
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Toobworld's friend Mayr came to our remote control rescue with a rundown of suspects in the death of Paul Cramer on 'One Life To Live':

David Tom played Paul Cramer. Brother to Kelly Cramer, Dorean's niece.

He was married briefly to Babe. She is now married to JR Chandler from 'All my Children'.

Paul had stolen Babe's baby and given him to his sister, Kelly. She had had a miscarriage, and asked him to find her a baby so she wouldn't loose her husband, Kevin Buchanan.

Paul also had started a relationship with Natalie. She realized he was bad news, and broke up with him.

He needed money from a botched illegal job he was supposed to do for RJ, so he tried to black mail Jen. Jen's mother and Rex had an affair, and Rex had taped it. Paul stole the tape, and told Jen she had to sleep with him or he would put the tape on the internet. Jen chickened out, so Paul put it on the net.

SO...In summation (yeah...right):

Paul has RJ after him for the money he owes him.
Paul has Lindsey after him because the tape hit the net.
Rex is also after Paul because he hurt Lindsey and Jen (whom he loves).
Babe has found out what he has done with her baby, and wants him gone!
So does her dad (David) and her boyfriend (Jamie)
Natalie had a fight with him the night he was killed. He tried to rape her. She struggled, he beat her up, and so had his blood on her sweater...and all over the room he was living in.
David (from OLTL) and Dorean both want him gone because of the mess he has caused with Kelly and her baby.
Kevin wants him gone because of the same reason.

The last few weeks was putting all of this together. So, who knows who killed him?? Does that make any sense??"

Works for me.
Thanks, Mayr.
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I heard from my "Kryptonian" friend and fellow Iddiott Brian-El regarding that taping of 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire':

Hey, Toby! I was just about to reply to your other e-mail...yes, I sawyour blog & liked it, although you may want to correct that bit about mebeing a future contestant--I'm in the pool but I may not get picked (justlike two years ago, or ten years ago when I was in the Jeopardy!contestant pool).

NEway, I'm really glad you got in [to see the show]! I was worried about that--I kept wondering how that was going to work. But there were several people who showed up with friends before 11:45 and the friends were told to come back at 1:00 if they weren't auditioning, so I figured you'd get in if there was room.

BCnU, 2!!
Brian-El
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I heard from a girl I used to work with, Kelly; a real "swedie". (She'll get that joke, not many others.)

My hometown made it's mark on the toobworld map tonight. I was watching "ER", and Ray Liotta guest starred as a dying patient who had been incarcerated in the prison in Taylorville, Illinois - the dark abyss where I spent the first 15 years of my life (the town, not the prison)!

The prison opened after I was off at college. It's a high minimum-security facility, and Ray was supposedly in there for murder, for a whopping 9 years... hmmmm. Such is life in toobworld!

Don't you love it when a TV show makes that special connection with you?
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I don't think you can have crossovers in toobwyrld for reality type things, but, I had the food channel on (fortunately, with the sound off) and they got all the folks that do their individual shows into one room to be doing a goofy thanksgiving thing.....

Art Carey

Although I don't go out of my way to look for reality show crossovers, I think they would still count. After all, some of them do go on to have crossovers with fictional shows - like when characters from 'Yes, Dear' got involved with a houseful of 'Big Brother' contestants.

So I think it would have been cool to see this special line-up. But I just can't see myself going out of my way to check out the Food channel....
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Everyday I run down through the essays I have on my Inner Toob blog, hoping to see if any of them has sparked a response in the comments section. But alas! It seems as though I'm just shouting into the wind.

There's no real sense of a traffic monitor for the blog, so I have no idea if anybody is even visiting the site at all.

And then I go and read the message boards for a few TV shows out there and realize that maybe, in the long run, I'm better off for working out my Toobworld theories under the radar!

I have a friend at work named Craig who recently appeared with his whole family in an episode of 'Nanny 911'. The producers took 250 hours of tape and had to boil its essence down to fit a 42 minute slot (allowing for the commercial time to fill out the hour).

And the results were not particularly well-received by those who saw the show........

I feel sorry for these children. I think lazy parents produce children with severe behavioral problems.

I think since Craig lets his kids walk all over him at home, he is probably a mean cop. Since he has absolutely NO authority at home, he probably makes up for it on the job. The mother is about the most ridiculous excuse for a mom that I've ever seen on earth! It would be like living in a zoo with a dad who is gone to work and a mom who is checked out emotionally all the time. Please wake up, people, for your kid's sake.

Have you ever seen such lazy parenting in your life? Tracy needs to get off her butt and discipline her children. I just am so angry watching this show I'd like to smack the parents as much as I'd like to smack the kids. She is lazy and disgusting. Her house is a wreck because she's letting these little monsters run it. SHE is the one who needs a nanny - not the kids.

She's bringing out the violence in me too!!! :) I have never seen someone put less effort into parenting in my life. She is the reason people should have to have IQ tests and maybe common sense tests before they get pregnant.

These parents deserve EVERYTHING they are experiencing as a result of being so irresponsible - not only to their own children - but more importantly to society!!!! SICKENING!

I do feel that the parents have brought all this on themselves, they chose to have 5 children and obviously they should had stopped at two.

I still think she is a SLUG, and the worst kind of mother.

I don't understand how the father can allow that considering he is a police officer. The mom has no clue, clearly. But her husband undermined her and told the kids "don't tell Mommy"

Why would you go on a T.V show, and then behave so immature and hostile.

Tracy get off your butt..honey !!!!

Let [this] family be a warning to all parents that the time to figure out things is with the first child ... not the fifth for Heaven's sake!

I was just watching the show and I have NEVER been more furious at a mother in my life. I find her LAZY, and WORTHLESS!!! But I also lay blame to the father too. He should have gotten up off his butt and laid down the law as my father would have done. In my opinion these people should have just stayed a couple and had some dogs NOT children.

I think that Craig should know how to disipline his children because he's a New York cop and New York cops discipline people in the mean streets of New York.

If you're going to breed em, at least try to raise 'em.

That cop should know better. There's a million cops out there that are good Dads, my dad was one of them. Most cops learn how to deal with situations without killing/maiming people. They aren't drunken Vikings on an idiot rampage..

That cop should know better, he's dealing with the results of what he's raising EVERYDAY.

I would rather be dead than Craig

Wow I never want to have kids

Both parents are infantile and self-gratifying, pretending to be helpless, and letting the kids run the show. T

$10 says he's so disrespectful to the wife by undermining her rules, and disgusted with the kids by neglecting educating them to be good adults------because he's already PLAYING the field. He's got one foot out the door already. He HATES the situation he's in, so he's passive-aggressively trying to destroy everybody. I'm surprised he isn't giving them Tequila shots! He just can't afford child support on so many brats, so he's STUCK! He'll eventually split though, nobody wants to live like that. And the "infantile" wife will pretend ignorance as to WHY he left.

Craig needs to step up and be a father. He didn't help one bit with his negative comments and giving the kids coffee behind his wife's back. If he didn't want to father five kids, he shouldn't have had them.

Bush changed his mind on abortion after watching Nanny 911.

Oh my god, they are playing in their own urine!

A worthless not too attractive wife and 5 rotten kids that dont look a thing like him

Are these people real? I think their parents are related. They look a lot alike, that might be the problem!

Yes, they don't look right. Especially the youngest two...twins maybe? The low hanging brows, the slack mouths, the weird eyes...the orange hair makes it worse.

They put themselves on national television and we as viewers have every right to comment on the content of the show. If they didn't want other to judge their lives then they should have hired someone privately for help.

And then there's the guy who went trolling for a little afternoon delight....

hey [Tracey], are you looking for a side dish when your husband is serving us proud on the streets of new york....

So now, I'm feeling better about my little blog. If you find yourself at Inner Toob, great. If not, that's probably even better!

BCnU!
Tele-Toby