THE HAT SQUAD: GEORGE McGOVERN

From the New York Times:

George McGovern, the United States senator who won the Democratic Party’s presidential nomination in 1972 as an opponent of the war in Vietnam and a champion of liberal causes, and who was then trounced by President Richard M. Nixon in the general election, died early Sunday in Sioux Falls, S.D. He was 90.

- David E. Rosenbaum

Senator George McGovern, whose ill-fated campaign for the Presidency usually clouds over all the great things he did, had a presence in Toobworld. He hosted 'Saturday Night Live' and he appeared in that infamous dream of Dr. Bob Hartley's in 'Newhart'. That's why I've included him in my list of TV personae who have passed away over the year for 2012.

Here's his monologue from his appearance on 'Saturday Night Live'.

Good night and may God bless.......

LOU GRANT: ME-TV'S GOT SPUNK!

I don't remember seeing the 'Mary Tyler Moore Show' reunion special some years back - did they all appear as themselves or as the characters they played on the show? And if they were appearing as the characters, was there talk about Ted Baxter being dead, or did they just talk about Ted Knight? Was there anything said about this in the TV movie "Mary And Rhoda"?

Because if nothing was said about Ted Baxter being dead, it would be nice to consider him as still being alive in Toobworld, still with Georgette, watching his grandchildren grow up.....

As for Lou Grant looking so old in comparison to not only Ted but to Mary as well, that's just the effects of going back to his old job, I'm sure. The stress got to him. Or maybe this works better:

Mary asked Lou to make that speech years ago and he's only now getting around to it. Ted, on the other hand, is in the "present" day, but he relies heavily on make-up to make himself look ageless.

BCnU!

RICHARDS & HARTLEY - TOGETHER AGAIN FOR THE FIRST TIME

I don't really see any problem with this mash-up connection between the two sitcoms, can you?

DR. HARTLEY, CALL ME MAYBE

Dr. Bob Hartley of 'The Bob Newhart Show' also appears in a Me-TV blipvert in which he's the magnet for a couple of crossovers in typical Newhart fashion - via the phone.....

As you can see, since it's the older Dr. Hartley answering those calls, there is a timeline discrepancy. Had it been the younger Bob, there would have been no Zonk - even for 'Batman'.

I'm sure with a little research, Me-TV could find plenty of clips of Dr. Hartley from the 1970's which could be intercut with other TV characters now seen on the network who are also using the phone.

BCnU!

TOOBWORLD THEATER: "THE DEAD MAN"

AS SEEN ON TV: JOHN MICHAEL FEARING

 

JOHN MICHAEL FEARING

AS SEEN IN:

'Night Gallery'

"Dead Man"

CREATED BY:

Fritz Lieber

PORTRAYED BY:

Michael Blodgett

TV DIMENSION:

Earth Prime-Time

From the IMDb.com:

A doctor uses a man who is highly susceptible to suggestion to simulate any disease through hypnosis. The only carrot keeping the subject there was the attraction between him and the doctor's much younger wife. Finally the doctor decides to have this young man cheat death. When the doctor can't bring him back by signal or medical means the young man is buried, the result of an unfortunate accident. The doctor's colleague goes through his notes and discovers that unconsciously the jealous doctor gave him the wrong signal to revive him. His wife hears this discussion and runs for the cemetery.

(Written by Laird -3)

BCnU!

"MOCKINGBIRD LANE" PREVIEW

So who's going to watch the 'Munsters' reboot on tonight?  (8 pm EST, NBC)

I plan to catch the special, but I doubt I would have committed to the series.  TV shows that can't fit into my grand design for the Toobworld Dynamic tend to fall out of favor with me.  And Earth Prime-Time already has its Munster family - as seen in the 1960s sitcom 'The Munsters'.

I had my own druthers as to who would play some of the characters in a remake, but they would have hewed closer to the original look for the series.  My choice for Grandpa would have been Judd Hirsch and as for Herman?  Brad Garrett, Adam Baldwin, maybe even Daniel Baldwin.  (No relation!)

I do like the look for Lily with Portia de Rossi, however.

I have a feeling this is going to be very dark, with people actually dying.  Therefore I think the best place to tuck this away would be in the Evil Mirror dimension.  

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: WHITE WALKER

A WHITE WALKER

AS SEEN IN:

'Game Of Thrones'

CREATED BY:

George R.R. Martin

PORTRAYED BY:

Ross Mullan

TV STATUS:

Generic name, one of many

TV DIMENSION:

The main TV Universe, the Planet Mondas

From the 'Game Of Thrones' wiki:

The White Walkers, referred to as the Others in the books, are a mythological race mentioned in ancient legends and stories from the time of the First Men and the Children of the Forest. Eight thousand years before Robert's Rebellion, a winter known as the Long Night lasted a generation. In the darkness and cold of the Long Night, the White Walkers descended upon Westeros from the farthest north, the polar regions of the Lands of Always Winter. None knew why they came, but they killed all in their path, reanimating the dead as wights to kill the living at their command. Eventually the peoples of Westeros rallied and in a conflict known as the War for the Dawn, the White Walkers were defeated and driven back into the uttermost north, with the Wall raised to bar their return. In the present day, most believe they never existed and are just the stuff of legends, and even the few who believe they did once exist think they went extinct thousands of years ago. Certainly, none has been seen for thousands of years.

While held as myths and spoken of in the same breath as ghosts, goblins, "Grumkins and Snarks", there is a growing belief amongst the wildlings who live beyond the Wall that the White Walkers have returned.

"In that darkness the White Walkers came for the first time.

They swept through cities and kingdoms, riding their dead horses,

hunting with their packs of pale spiders big as hounds."

Old Nan

BCnU!

MISSING LINKS - RICHARD CASTLE & JB FLETCHER?

When Detective Ryan of the NYPD's 12th Precinct (in an alternate Toobworld) found out that a man had been shot who had then stumbled on to the Hamptons property of Richard Castle to die in the pool, Ryan exclaimed that the mystery author was living 'Murder, She Wrote'.

Castle quickly pointed out that it was more like 'Murder, He Wrote'. But unlike Jessica Fletcher, he wasn't on friendly terms with the local law enforcement.

So there's a Zonk that needs to be investigated......

First off, I shouldn't even bother, since 'Castle' takes place in another TV dimension, possibly sharing the same one as 'Commander-In-Chief'. But we've seen, thanks to 'Missing', that he does exist as an author in Earth Prime-Time, at least as an author if not attached to Detective Kate Beckett's team. But just in case he is leading the same life as his dimensional doppelganger, I'll give it a shot.

There would be no Zonk in Richard Castle name-checking Jessica Fletcher. They probably know each other as fellow mystery writers, perhaps sharing the same publisher and maybe even vying for the same awards (such as the Blunt Instrument as seen in 'The Adventures Of Ellery Queen'.)

The true Zonk is the mention of 'Murder, She Wrote', the TV show about Jessica Fletcher.

But on the title was mentioned, and there was no reference to it being a TV show.

THE SPLAININ:

"Murder, She Wrote" is the umbrella title for the mysteries written by JB Fletcher, in much the same way that J.R.R. Tolkien's Middle-Earth trilogy is known overall as "The Lord Of The Rings", Paul Scott's novels about India are known as "The Raj Quartet", and the collected novels by George R.R. Martin that are the basis for the HBO series 'Game Of Thrones' are known as the "Song Of Ice And Fire Cycle".

So when somebody in Toobworld - no matter what the dimension - speaks of "Murder, She Wrote", they're talking about novels like:

• "The Corpse Danced At Midnight"
• "The Corpse Swam By Moonlight"
• "The Corpse At Vespers"
• "The Corpse That Wasn't There"
• "The Dead Man Sang"
• "Dirge For A Dachshund"

and

• "Goodbye, Charlie"

Among many others. (In all, Ms. Fletcher wrote about 43 novels during the show's run.)

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: DR. FELIX HOENIKKER

I suppose this entry in the "ASOTV" showcase kicks off our theme week for Halloween. After all, War is horror, isn't it?

DR. FELIX HOENIKKER

AS SEEN IN:

"Between Time And Timbuktu"

(or "Prometheus 5")

CREATED BY:

Kurt Vonnegut

PORTRAYED BY:

Hurd Hatfield

TV DIMENSION:

Alternate Toobworld

From Wikipedia:

Ice-nine is a fictional material appearing in Kurt Vonnegut's novel Cat's Cradle. In the story, it is developed by the Manhattan Project for use as a weapon, but abandoned when it becomes clear that any quantity of it would have the power to destroy all life on earth. Ice-nine is supposedly a polymorph of water more stable than common ice (Ice Ih); instead of melting at 0 °C (32 °F), it melts at 45.8 °C (114.4 °F). When ice-nine comes into contact with liquid water below 45.8 °C (thus effectively becoming supercooled), it acts as a seed crystal and causes the solidification of the entire body of water, which quickly crystallizes as more ice-nine. As people are mostly water, this effect means ice-nine kills nearly instantly when ingested or brought into contact with soft tissues exposed to the bloodstream, such as the eyes. A global catastrophe involving freezing the world's oceans with ice-nine is used as a plot device in Vonnegut's novel.

From Technovelogy.com:

A general had a problem: mud. Marines have slogged their way through it for generations. Is it possible to get rid of mud? Without having to carry anything heavy? Marines already have enough to carry.

Dr. Felix Hoenikker, an original thinker, found the "outside-the-box" answer; a single crystal of Ice-Nine would crystallize every bit of water it touched.

From the source ("Cat's Cradle"):
"...suppose, young man, that one Marine had with him a tiny capsule containing a seed of ice-nine, a new way for the atoms of water to stack and lock, to freeze. If that Marine threw that seed into the nearest puddle...?"
"The puddle would freeze?" I guessed.
"And all the muck around the puddle?"
"It would freeze?"
"And all the puddles in the frozen muck?"
"They would freeze?"
"And the pools and the streams in the frozen muck?"
"They would freeze?"
"You bet they would !" He cried. "And the United States Marines would rise from the swamp and march on!" 

With Stony Stephenson

- "Cat's Cradle", by Kurt Vonnegut. 

Published by Random House in 1963

BCnU!

LA TRIVIATA - PERRY MASON'S URN

Have you ever noticed that large urn behind 'Perry Mason' when he's sitting at his desk? I believe that urn contains the ashes of his dead mother.  I'm thinking that his mother, although never seen on the series, died during the run of the show. Because the urn wasn't always there in the office. For awhile there wasn't even a place back there where he could have placed an urn.

Here's the evolution of his office redecoration:

 

 

I suppose it could have been the ashes of his father, but there's just something about Mason that makes me think he was closer to his mother. And it's nothing to do with the actor Raymond Burr, not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just that time and again Mason has shown a tender side towards his clients and others - even to the real murderers in some cases.  And I think that's something he probably learned from his mother.....

BCnU!

NUMBERS RUNNING: 23 SKIDOO!

At 23 minutes before 1 AM, Hercule Poirot was awakened by the sound of a "Murder On The Orient Express".

In the 'Perry Mason' episode "The Case Of The Reluctant Model", the murder victim was found in the shower of Maxine Lindsey's apartment. She lived in Apartment #23, which may have made her a magnet for such a life-altering event.

After all, "23" is one of the numbers in the sequence from 'Lost'.

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: DR. CONSTANTINE

DOCTOR CONSTANTINE

AS SEEN IN:

'Poirot'

"Murder On The Orient Express"

CREATED BY:

Dame Agatha Christie

PORTRAYED BY:

Samuel West

TV STATUS:

Multi-versatile Recastaway

[BookWorld, Cineverse, Toobworld, Alternate Toobworld]

TV DIMENSION:

Earth Prime-Time

From Wikipedia:

WARNING! THERE BE SPOILERS AHEAD!

Hercule Poirot boards the Orient Express in Constantinople. The train is unusually crowded for the time of year. Poirot secures a berth only with the help of his friend M. Bouc, a director of the Compagnie Internationale des Wagons-Lits. When a Mr. Harris fails to show up, Poirot takes his place. On the second night, Poirot gets a compartment to himself.

That night, in Vinkovci, at about twenty-three minutes before 1:00 am, Poirot wakes to the sound of a loud noise. It seems to come from the compartment next to his, which is occupied by Mr. Ratchett.

The next day he awakens to find that Ratchett is dead, having been stabbed twelve times in his sleep. M. Bouc suggests that Poirot take the case, being that it is so obviously his kind of case; nothing more is required than for him to sit, think, and take in the available evidence. [Working with him, along with M. Bouc as his "Watson", is Dr. Constantine who had been in one of the other cars.

Loosely faithful to the original story, it has a number of major differences, such as the character of Cyrus Hardman being omitted from the story, with Doctor Constantine (who is changed from a Greek doctor to Mrs. Armstrong's American obstetrician) taking his place among the "jury".

From the Poirot wiki:
Mary Debenham organised that those wronged by Cassetti should meet on the train. Constantine was one of the twelve to stab Cassetti. He then attempted to mislead Hercule Poirot by suggesting false theories. After uncovering the crime, Poirot let the murderers go as they had killed an evil man. (S12: "Murder on the Orient Express")

O'BSERVATIONS:

This is one time where I thought the changes to Christie's original story improved the mystery, and Dr. Constantine was a good example of that. By making him one of the Twelve, it eliminated a character that never really seemed to fit into the group of suspects.

This Dr. Constantine, albeit an American, could be the son of the Dr. Constantine whom the Time Lord known as the Doctor met in London during the World War II blitz.

BCnU!

AFTER THE FOX - MICHAEL THE FIRST (X2)

Movie characters and even full movies aren't the only things borrowed from the Cineverse and absorbed into the Toobworld Dynamic. Tropes - plot cliches - are sometimes taken so that I can make a particular crossover theory work.

Toobworld has a long tradition of "identical cousins", and that includes half brothers or sisters with a different parent. But thanks to "The Parent Trap", I also use the idea that twins can be separated due to divorce and each raised by a different parent. This sometimes leads to the twins having different last names.

I was in a big 'Burke's Law' phase last year, and right now I'm enjoying 'Perry Mason' on ME-TV. Each of them had one of those twins appearing on a recurring basis, and best of all both of them went into the same line of work!

These "twins" were played by Michael Fox.  And they are definitely two different men and not one guy who decided to change his name in 1963 (where the two series overlap.)  Dr. McLeod has a sense of humor on the job while Dr. Hoxie is of a more serious bent.

On 'Perry Mason', there were 25 episodes in which Fox either appeared or was heard as the coroner Dr. Hoxie. Actually, in almost half of those episodes Fox was simply listed as "Autopsy Surgeon". I'll come back to that later. But in another episode he was listed as Dr. Samuel Anders. I take that to mean that his full name was Samuel Anders Hoxie.

Meanwhile, on 'Burke's Law', Fox played Dr. George McLeod the coroner in 26 episodes. In this series, though, there was another glitch - three of those episodes had Fox playing "Police Officer". Here's the splainin I came up with for that - in Toobworld the rules are sometimes different than in the real world. One of these would be that the coroners sometimes had official police-style uniforms. On three occasions, Dr. McLeod wore his.

As children, Sam and George were separated when their parents divorced. Either one of them could have been raised by the mother and had his name changed once she remarried, with the new husband adopting the boy. If it was Sam, it could also be that the mother remarried twice and Sam ended up with both last names - "Anders" and "Hoxie". But more likely "Anders" is Sam Hoxie's middle name, one that came from the family name on one side of the family tree or the other. "Samuel Anders Hoxie" does sound pretty official.

Now as to Dr. Hoxie being listed as "Autopsy Surgeon".....

As long-time readers of Inner Toob might remember, I give no weight to the end credits on TV shows. Too often either they are wrong or they are just not relevant to the story which preceded those credits.

So we might as well assume that by "Autopsy Surgeon", he was still appearing as Dr. Samuel Anders Hoxie. However, he could just as easily have been appearing as his twin brother George McLeod, normally seen on 'Burke's Law'.

Michael Fox played many different characters in Toobworld. Some of them could be ancestors of these twin brothers, like the attorney he played in 'The Big Valley'. Others could be "identical cousins", like the veterinarian he played in an episode of 'Columbo'.

Or their Daddy was playing around. There would be a good reason that he ended up divorced......

Two for Tuesday!

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: "AUTHOR" WIGGEN & BRUCE PEARSON

On the eve of the World Series, I figured it's time for talking baseball.....

HENRY WIGGEN & BRUCE PEARSON

AS SEEN IN:

'The U.S. Steel Hour'

"Bang The Drum Slowly"

CREATED BY:

Mark Harris

PORTRAYED BY:

Paul Newman as Henry "Author" Wiggen

Albert Salmi as Bruce Pearson

TV STATUS:

Multi-versatile

[BookWorld, Toobworld, Cineverse]

TV DIMENSION:

Earth Prime-Time

From Wikipedia:

"Bang the Drum Slowly" is a novel by Mark Harris, a sequel to "The Southpaw" (1953). It was first published in 1956, and was later made into a 1956 'U.S. Steel Hour' television adaptation starring Paul Newman and a later film adaptation in 1973.

Harris' narrator Henry "Author" Wiggen, a star pitcher, tells the story of a baseball season with the New York Mammoths (a fictional team based on the New York Giants as noted in the author's book "Diamond - The Baseball Writings of Mark Harris") -- a season notable for the team's success but blighted by the Hodgkin's Disease of catcher Bruce Pearson. Wiggen tries to be supportive of Pearson while concealing his illness.

The title comes from the song "The Streets of Laredo", sung by one of the ballplayers (Piney Woods, a back-up catcher recently recalled from the minors) at a team gathering. The version of the song that he sings contains the lyrics, "O bang the drum slowly, and play the fife lowly...."

The novel is written in the vernacular, with idiosyncratic awkward writing by the "author" that Harris has "employed," pitcher Henry Wiggen.

The last line of the novel, "From here on in I rag nobody", was ranked number 95 on American Book Review's "100 Best Last Lines from Novels" in 2008.

O'BSERVATION:

In the New York City of Toobworld, the major baseball teams are now the Yankees, the Mets, and the Empires (from 'Clubhouse'). In the years since this production, the Mammoths have probably been sold and moved to a new location out of state. Perhaps somewhere out West and along the Canadian border. The name is a good fit for such a location.

Two for Tuesday!

BCnU!

NEW YORK STATE OF MIND

Right now, CBS is juggling about four TV dimensions on their schedule:

1] 'Blue Bloods'

2] 'Hawaii Five-O'

3] 'Elementary'

Everything else - from '2 Broke Girls' and 'CSI' to 'The Mentalist' and 'Partners' - takes place in the main Toobworld. 'Vegas' takes place in Earth Prime-Time's Past while the framing device of 'How I Met Your Mother' is set in its Future. (Unless of course it changes teh future history so much that it has to be banished to an alternate dimension.)

'Hawaii Five-O' is a remake; the original belongs in Toobworld1. They did a cross-over with 'NCIS: LA', but for those two episodes we were watching the 'NCIS: LA' cast from the Land of Remakes. (REALLY need to find a good name for that dimension!)

We might be able to reduce the number of TV dimensions on CBS if we combine 'Blue Bloods' and 'Hawaii Five-O'. Both of them have different people in positions of power then seen in the real world and Toobworld. With 'Hawaii Five-O' it's the governor, while it's the mayor and the police commissioner over in 'Blue Bloods'. Everything about that combination should be good as long as neither show mentions anybody else in those capacities - and why should they? The shows are located more than a continent apart from each other!

As for 'Elementary', I'm afraid that show is going to have a very lonely existence in its own dimension. Too many other dimensions have already established that Holmes operated in the Victorian and Edwardian periods, or at the very least acknowledged the existence of the books by Conan Doyle.

You know what? I'm wrong. There is one other production that could share the same dimension. It was a one-off TV movie in which Agatha Christie's Belgian detective was updated to modern times - Hercule Poirot in a very bad version of "Murder On The Orient Express".

Now it looks like CBS will be bringing in another TV dimension later this winter. 'Golden Boy' stars Theo James of 'Bedlam' (and who played the ill-fated Turkish diplomat Pamuk in 'Downton Abbey'). 'Golden Boy' is about a young cop who has a meteoric rise from a patrolman to detective and finally to the NYPD commissioner.

Right there 'Golden Boy' is blocked from joining either Earth Prime-Time, and it's not going to be welcomed by the Reagan family in 'Blue Bloods'.

It just may be that, like 'Elementary' was (until my sudden revelation a few minutes ago), 'Golden Boy' will be the sole occupant of its own TV dimension.

 

BCnU!

AS SEEN ON TV: CAPTAIN TOBIAS GREGSON

CAPTAIN TOBIAS GREGSON

AS SEEN IN:

'Elementary'

CREATED BY:

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

PORTRAYED BY:

Aidan Quinn

TV STATUS:

Recastaway

TV DIMENSION:

Alternate Toobworld

From Wikipedia:

Inspector (Tobias) Gregson, a Scotland Yard inspector, was first introduced in A Study
 in Scarlet (1887), and he subsequently appears in "The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter" (1893), "The Adventure of Wisteria Lodge" (1908) and "The Adventure of the Red Circle" (1911). Holmes declares him to be "the smartest of the Scotland Yarders," but given Holmes' opinion of the Scotland Yard detectives, this is not sweeping praise. In one of the stories Watson specifically mentions the callous and cool way in which Gregson moved. His rival in crimefighting at Scotland Yard is Inspector G. Lestrade.

Gregson first appears in A Study in Scarlet and is a polar opposite of another Yarder Doyle created, Inspector Lestrade. Lestrade and Gregson are such visual opposites, it indicates the barrier Doyle drew between them to emphasise their professional animosity. Gregson is tall, "tow-headed" (fair-haired) in contrast to shorter Lestrade's dark features and has "fat, square hands."

Of all the Yarders, Gregson comes the closest to meeting Sherlock Holmes on intellectual grounds while acknowledging Holmes's abilities, even admitting to Holmes once that he always feels more confident when he has Holmes's aid in a case.

Regrettably, he is bound within the confines of the law he serves, and the delay in getting his assistance turns to a near-complete tragedy in "The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter" because it takes so long to get his legal help. He also has some regrettable human flaws. During Study in Scarlet he laughs at the stupidity of his colleague, Lestrade, before Holmes and Watson, even though he is also on the wrong trail. In "The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter" it takes too long to engage his assistance in preventing a kidnapping and murder.

Unlike Lestrade, Gregson overlooks the little grey areas of the law, and in "The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter" overlooks Holmes' use of breaking of a window in order to enter a premises. Because of this, the life of Mycroft Holmes' fellow lodger is saved.

Gregson last appears in Doyle's "The Adventure of the Red Circle" under events that transpire in 1902 but are not published by Dr. Watson until 1911. In this last writing, Watson observes that:

Our official detectives may blunder in the matter of intelligence, but never in that of courage. Gregson climbed the stair to arrest this desperate murderer with the same absolutely quiet and businesslike bearing with which he would have ascended the official staircase of Scotland Yard. The Pinkerton man had tried to push past him, but Gregson had firmly elbowed him back. London dangers were the privilege of the London force.

Captain Gregson with Dr. Watson

From the 'Elementary' wiki:

Aidan Quinn as Captain Tobias Gregson of the New York City Police Department. He genuinely likes Holmes and the two have mutual respect for each other.

Captain Tobias Gregson (portrayed by actor Aidan Quinn) is a Captain in the New York City Police Department, and a primary character in 'Elementary'. In "Pilot" he states that after the 9/11 attacks he was sent over to London to observe how Scotland Yard operate counter terrorism which is where he met Sherlock who was, at the time, working homicide. 

 
http://skyliving.sky.com/elementary/tobias-gregson-actor-aidan-quinn-video-interview

BCnU!

"POSTCRYPT" - A FICTION OF TOOBWORLD

"POSTCRYPT"

by

TOBY O'BRIEN

Even in that crowded collection of colorfully costumed criminals - Don't you love alliteration? - it was not difficult to spot my quarry, dressed as he was in a wildly expressive jester's outfit, complete to the tinkling silver bells of his cap.  It was from his costume, in fact, that he had taken his nom de infamie: Dr. Motley.

He had not been long in the super-villain trade - in his previous life he was probably just some college graduate, too smart for the room, who had turned his intelligence and skills with a computer to evil.  He was a professional cyber-hacker capable of draining a bank's resources to enrich his own coffers.  Dr. Motley would have done well as a desk-bound henchman for one of the more powerful criminal overlords in the country - Lex Luthor or Mr. Schubert, perhaps.

But no, he was like all the others gathered there that night, with an insatiable need to flaunt his larcenous talents from behind a masked persona.

And apparently, even though I was garbed in a drab brown approximation of the costume once worn by my father in his too-soon terminated stint as a super-villain in Gotham City, I must have stood out from that crowd as well.  For Dr. Motley noticed that I had been staring at him.  Seeing that as my opening, I lifted my glass in salute to him.

Motley excused himself from a discussion with several lesser lights in the Evil League of Evil and - although he had a slight limp, - he began to wend his way through the swarm of super-villains towards me, the bells of his fool's cap announcing his approach.

It was quite the turnout of ne'er-do-wells, gathered for a memorial tribute to Clockwise, one of the arch-nemeses of Black Scorpion.  The Time-obsessed villain had died in prison, stripped of his alias and known as Benjamin Tickerman - but as his twin brother The Riddler pointed out in his eulogy, that moniker was just as false as his own of "Edward Nigma".

Having suffered through the other testimonials by Big Hand and Little Hand, the henchmen of Clockwise, and by the still lovely Hourglass, everyone had retired to the bar to celebrate the criminal career of Clockwise.  And it was there that I planned to lay the trap for Dr. Motley.

I had nothing against the lad personally.  It was merely business to me, another contract hit to be carried out in a style that would celebrate my late father's own criminal career.  But as I listened to that puffed-up cyber-pirate prattle on about his exploits in Bay City and Central City and now Starling City, especially knowing that for the most part Dr. Motley had his fool's cap handed to him by the super-hero defenders of those cities, I knew I would feel no compunction in killing him.

"One of my first jobs as the 'Cyber-Jester of Crime'," Dr. Motley said as he reached me, "was to download the files about the villains of Gotham City.  Straight out of the Bat-Computer itself!  So I recognize that you're wearing.  But....."

"It's based on my father's costume," I replied.  "That's who you have in your files - the original Bookworm.  But sadly, he's gone now and I've inherited the family business as it were.  The costume, the weapons, even some of his henchmen - Index and Appendix, and Chapter and Verse - worked for me after his death.  I have new henchmen now, however, ever since they retired."

Dr. Motley nodded, and those insufferable little bells tinkled annoyingly.  "I remember his M. O. - he based his crimes on plots from books, didn't he?  Because he couldn't come up with an original idea to save his life?"

I smiled, if you could call it that; more like thinly pressing my lips together.  I would enjoy putting an end to his miserable life!  "Everything I am today I learned by my father's side.  When I was old enough, I became his sidekick 'Sequel'.  However, I have taken his modus operandi and I have adapted it to suit my own needs.  As a matter of fact, I'm delighted you sought me out, Dr. Motley."

The fool was pleasantly surprised.  "You've heard of me?"

"Who hasn't heard of the great escapes made by Dr. Motley by outwitting the superior super-heroes Flash and NightMan long enough to run away?"  As I expected, the sarcasm was lost to him, buried beneath the flattery.  "And now to have eluded this new upstart in Central City?  What are they calling him?  The Arrow?"

"Yes...."  Dr. Motley winced as his hand instinctively massaged his thigh.  But for a moment I feared that he might turn on his heel and break off our conversation.  "I was under the impression that Starling City was free of super-heroes.  This guy with the bow and arrows must be a newbie."

I made certain that I didn't mask my dismay that he must have been injured by the archer.  "I see that you're limping, Doctor.  That is a shame, as I was rather hoping to solicit your advice, considering your expertise with cybernetics."

"Oh?"  That piqued his interest.  Everyone likes to be considered a genius in some capacity.

"I've developed a computer program, which I have named 'Amontillado', which should turn public opinion against one of the super-heroes here in The City.  However, it would have required a small amount of travel, no more than just around the corner on the next block.  But if it should pain you to walk, I suppose I could always confer with Harold Finch......"

"Finch?" Dr. Motley scoffed.  He snagged a drink from a passing waiter and quickly quaffed it.  "Harold Finch?  Finch wouldn't know the difference between the Ziggy super-computer and WOTAN!"

"Perhaps.  But your leg.....  And I really do need to have the Amontillado system checked out tonight.  I don't want to face Captain Liberty if my plan is not fully operational."

"A new computer system, you say....?"  I could smell the burning hamster flesh as they furiously spun the wheels in his mind.  "And just a block away?"

"Just around the corner."  I continued my feigned protest.  "But your leg....."

"Forget about my leg!" he snapped.  "I made it to this little shindig all the way from Starling City, didn't I?"

It could not have proceeded more according to my plan than if I had asked Dr. Motley to rehearse it with me.

He grabbed yet another drink which seemed to eliminate the pain in his leg, at least for the moment.  Taking the path of least notice by the others, I quickly and quietly led Dr. Motley from the hall and into the warm summer night of The City.

Motley was as good as his word in keeping pace with me as I led him down the street to an abandoned building around the corner.  It was situated in the middle of a large lot with no close neighbors and across the street were a row of warehouses, all lifeless so late in the night.  Once I had conceived of this plan to dispatch Dr. Motley, my new henchmen, Ibid and Op Cit, transformed this building to appear as though it was under renovation.

"The Montresor Building!" I announced proudly.

"This is your base of operations?" Dr. Motley asked with some hesitation.

"Only for the time being.  At least until my current mission is completed.  Surely you must admit it is beneath the notice of Captain Liberty in this state of repair.  Eventually I hope to transform the place into a gambling casino to be called the Fortunato.  That is, if I'm able to circumvent the laws currently which make gambling a crime in The City."

"Well, if anybody knows about the books, it's you, huh, Wormie?" sniggered Motley.

"Indeed....."  We entered the cavernous lobby and I beckoned Dr. Motley  towards the stairwell.  "I have a few members of The City council in my pocket, but Captain Liberty is leading the campaign against my grand design."

Motley smirked.  "'Grand design'....  You sure do talk fancy, Wormie."

"The curse of a well-read man," I replied.  I longed for that moment when I would be rid of this fool so that I would nevermore hear that sobriquet of "Wormie" again!

My victim suddenly winced and had to lean against the stairwell railing for support.

"Dr. Motley!" I protested.  "Let me take you back to your hotel, or to your lair, wherever!  I had no right to ask this of you.  I should have contacted Harold Finch and not bothered you."  It was a risk, making such an offer.  But if I was to honor the memory of my father properly, I had to follow the details in the original story as best I could.

"To hell with Finch!" Dr. Motley spat and he pushed off the wall to hurtle down the stairs with some determination.

Upon reaching the basement, I led him deeper into the catacombs with only the luminance provided by the flashlight I picked up from a work counter.

"So where is this computer?" he grumbled.  "I want to see what this Amontillado program of yours can do that's going to take out a super-hero."

"It's just ahead, Doctor."  I pointed to a shadowy alcove about ten feet away.  "You'll find it in there."

Motley entered ahead of me, causing a break in the electric eye beam.  This caused a barred gate to come crashing down to trap him inside.

Dr. Motley spun about, a mixture of fear and anger splayed across his features.  "Bookworm!  What the fu-#"

"Language, Doctor," I cautioned him.  From another pocket of shadows where they had been hidden, Ibid and Op Cit came forward - with a barrow full of fresh cement and a hod of bricks.

"What is this, Bookworm?" Motley demanded as my henchmen quickly constructed a wall to entomb this "Cyber-Jester of Crime" as he proclaimed himself.

"I apologize for the bars, Doctor," I said.  "I know I should have chained you to the back wall if I was going to adhere to the original text.  But I couldn't risk you still being strong enough - and sober enough! - to overpower me.  Better to side with caution thanks to some literary license."

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"  He gripped the bars and rattled them, but they held fast as I knew they would.  And with each attempt to shake them loose, the insipid bells of his cap tinkled as though to mock his efforts.

"Why, Doctor, I'm shocked," I said in mock surprise.  "Obviously you're not familiar with the classic tale by Poe - 'The Cask Of Amontillado'.  To be fair, I gave you plenty of clues - 'Montresor', 'Fortunato', the name 'Amontillado' itself.  I would have thought that for all your vaunted computer savvy, you could have invested in a Kindle."

Suddenly Dr. Motley screamed, raising a cry that would have alerted someone to his predicament - anywhere else.  Ibid and Op Cit ignored him as they added another layer of bricks.  It wouldn't be long before he was immured fully... and forever.

"You saw the location of the building," I pointed out over his screams.  "We're isolated on this block.  Even if there was somebody still about this neighborhood at this time of night, we're too deep into the bowels of the building for it to make any difference."

I could only see Dr. Motley now from his shoulders up and he suddenly disappeared from view as he stumbled back against the far wall.  "Why are you doing this?" he asked hoarsely.

"It was never personal, Doctor."  Of course, had I been forced to endure his company an hour longer it would have been.  But there was no need to burden him with that opinion.  "I am merely fulfilling a contract."

"Who wants me dead?"  His voice quavered as though he was about to cry.

"Harley Quinn.  You know who she is.  She contacted you when you first embarked on your criminal career, remember?  She demanded that you change your costume as it infringed on her own identity as a super-villain.  But you laughed at her, I'm told.  She didn't take kindly to that as you can see.

"It is as I told you earlier, Doctor.  I've taken my father's stock in trade and applied it to my own venture.  I'm a paid assassin who uses books as the inspiration for my contract killings.  And in your case, 'The Cask Of Amontillado' seemed to be the perfect choice for your execution.  You brought it on yourself by dressing the fool."

Dr. Motley rushed forward to the barred gate.  He had to stand on tip-toe in order to see over the wall of bricks.  There was a sad light of desperate hope flickering in his eyes.  "I can do that!" he wailed.  "I can get a new costume!  There's no need to continue this!"

"It's too late for that, Motley.  Ms. Quinn is determined to have her punishment carried out.  And I'm not about to break a contract.  Bad for business, bad for my own health."  I patted the new wall between us.  "Besides, that's not how the story goes."

There was just the one brick left to insert into the wall.  Motley tried to shove his hand through the aperture, but Op Cit rapped it with his trowel. 

"Bookworm!" he pleaded.  "For the love of God!"

I smiled.  The unexpected delivery of that line could not have been more perfect.  "Yes....  For the love of God."  Ibid inserted the last brick and then applied the cement wherever there was a possibility for air to get in to the not-so-good doctor.

"We'll be taking our leave now, Dr. Motley," I shouted.  I don't know if he was able to hear me by that point.  The wall was rather thick.  At least I couldn't hear the tinkle of the bells on his cap, for which I was grateful.  "We won't be coming back.  I doubt anyone will be coming this way, not for a very long time.  Certainly too late to do you any good."

Ibid and Op Cit stored away the equipment so that it looked like no one had been there since the last attempt at renovation.  They left before me to get the Bookmobile from its hidden parking spot and then it would be off to a new location with a new contract to fulfill.

Someone in the government wanted a prisoner killed because of the information he held against that bureaucrat.  Dale Biederbecke was the name of my next target, and apparently he was still a corpulent monstrosity despite being incarcerated for so many years. 

Because of his girth, he was known as "Dale The Whale".  So I think Mr. Biederbecke should be found dead in his prison cell with seven harpoons in his side.  A rather novel idea, I think......

~~~

I don't really do fan fiction - at least, I don't consider my usual posts in the Inner Toob blog to be fanfic.  But as I was writing up the posts about the TV adaptation of "The Cask Of Amontillado" by Edgar Allen Poe, the idea for this story came to me.  Took me about three hours to flesh it out.

The only characters and locations unique to this story were Sequel/Bookworm II, the son of the original Bookworm, Dr. Motley, and the two henchmen (I pictured Op Cit as being Asian.  I guess that's because the name suggests Hop Sing of 'Bonanza' to me.) 

Because of the costume worn by Fortunato in the original story, it made me think of Harlequin so those plot points were set in stone.  As for the stand-in for Montresor, I wanted to point out my acknowledgement to the source material, so who better than the Bookworm when it came to literary super-villains from Toobworld?

However, Roddy McDowall, who played the Bookworm on 'Batman', has been dead for over a decade.  And I think most of his TV characters have passed away as well (save for those in the Future.)  When it came to picturing the new Bookworm in my mind, I think David Tennant, the tenth actor to play the lead role in 'Doctor Who', is the perfect choice to be considered the son of McDowall.  (They even played the same role in the movie "Fright Night" and its remake.)

SHOWS CITED:

• 'American Masters' - "Edgar Allen Poe"
• 'Batman'
• 'The Tick'
• 'Birds Of Prey'
• 'Black Scorpion'
• 'Person Of Interest'
• 'Monk'
• 'Doctor Who'
• 'Quantum Leap'
• 'The Adventures Of Superman'
• 'The Flash'
• 'NightMan'
• 'Arrow'
• 'The Man From Atlantis'

Since this was a piece of fanfic, I should point out that most of the characters involved do not belong to me.  They are the property of their respective creators and/or the corporations that own the rights to their use.  Hell, I can't even lay claim to the basic story, but I don't think Mr. Poe is going to protest too much.....

BCnU!

ECCE PROMO! A PAIR O' DOCS

It's time to pay the bills.....

What's most interesting about this - besides the fact that it wasn't just random clips linked together to look like they belonged together, like they do on ME-TV - but instead it was filmed especially for this blipvert - is that Becker went to college with a guy who looked just like Frasier.

I don't know how Dr. Becker knows Dr. Crane, but I don't think they've ever met in person or else he might have noticed the resemblance to his friend Rick Cooper.

This interstitial could also be considered a part of the Promoverse.......

BCnU!

HOTEL CARTOON

Here's an interstitial from the Tooniverse - Crossovers in Action!

I used to work at the Hotel Carlton, not the Hotel Cartoon.  But sometimes I think that place of business was like this.....

BCnU!

"REACH FOR THE MOON"

I mentioned this TV game show (only to be found in Toobworld) about two weeks ago. Here's how it looked in an episode of 'The Goldbergs':

BCnU!

POLITICAL SPINNEY PART TWO

Big Bird got name-checked in the last two debates. Let's see if he gets mentioned in the final debate tomorrow.....

BCnU!

"AMOS BURKE" BY DON NIX

I wonder if he was influenced by the TV show 'Burke's Law' while writing this song......

Or, if this is the televersion of Don Nix, did he know the televersion of the LAPD Captain in the Homicide Division?

BCnU!

TOOBWORLD THEATER PRESENTS: "THE CASK OF AMONTILLADO"

From an episode of 'American Masters' about Edgar Allen Poe, here is the official televersion of "The Cask Of Amontillado":

This is my favorite Poe story.  

BCnU.......

AS SEEN ON TV: MONTRESOR & FORTUNATO

Another Sunday closer to Halloween and another literary "ASOTV" showcase with a different take on true horror.......

MONTRESOR & FORTUNATO

AS SEEN IN:

'American Masters' - "Edgar Allen Poe"
["The Cask Of Amontillado"]

CREATED BY:

Edgar Allen Poe

TV STATUS:

Recastaway

TV DIMENSION:

Earth Prime-Time

O'BSERVATION:

There were two previous adaptations of the tale, but from Finland and then from Poland. Because of accessibility and the predisposition of Toobworld Central towards English language productions, this is considered the portrayal for the main Toobworld even though it came along after those two versions.

From Wikipedia:

"The Cask of Amontillado" (sometimes spelled "The Casque of Amontillado") is a short story by Edgar Allan Poe, first published in the November 1846 issue of "Godey's Lady's Book".

The story is set in a nameless Italian city in an unspecified year (possibly in the 18th century) and is about the narrator's deadly revenge on a friend whom he believes has insulted him. Like several of Poe's stories, and in keeping with the 19th-century fascination with the subject, the narrative revolves around a person being buried alive—in this case, by immurement.

As in "The Black Cat" ,and "The Tell-Tale Heart", Poe conveys the story through the murderer's perspective.



Montresor tells the story of the day that he took his revenge on Fortunato, a fellow nobleman, to an unspecified person who knows him very well. Angry over some unspecified insult, he plots to murder his friend during Carnival when the man is drunk, dizzy, and wearing a jester's motley.

He baits Fortunato by telling him he has obtained what he believes to be a pipe (about 130 gallons, 492 litres) of a rare vintage of Amontillado. He claims he wants his friend's expert opinion on the subject. Fortunato goes with Montresor to the wine cellars of the latter's palazzo, where they wander in the catacombs. Montresor offers wine (first Medoc, then De Grave) to Fortunato. At one point, Fortunato makes an elaborate, grotesque gesture with an upraised wine bottle. When Montresor appears not to recognize the gesture, Fortunato asks, "You are not of the masons?" Montresor says he is, and when Fortunato, disbelieving, requests a sign, Montresor displays a trowel he had been hiding.

Montresor warns Fortunato, who has a bad cough, of the damp, and suggests they go back; Fortunato insists on continuing, claiming that "[he] shall not die of a cough." During their walk, Montresor mentions his family coat of arms: a foot in a blue background crushing a snake whose fangs are embedded in the foot's heel, with the motto "Nemo me impune lacessit" ("No one insults me with impunity").

When they come to a niche, Montresor tells his victim that the Amontillado is within. Fortunato enters and, drunk and unsuspecting, does not resist as Montresor quickly chains him to the wall. Montresor then declares that, since Fortunato won't go back, he must "positively leave [him]".

Montresor walls up the niche, entombing his friend alive. At first, Fortunato, who sobers up faster than Montresor anticipated he would, shakes the chains, trying to escape. Fortunato then screams for help, but Montresor mocks his cries, knowing nobody can hear them. Fortunato laughs weakly and tries to pretend that he is the subject of a joke and that people will be waiting for him (including the Lady Fortunato).

As the murderer finishes the topmost row of stones, Fortunato wails, "For the love of God, Montresor!" Montresor replies, "Yes, for the love of God!"

He listens for a reply but hears only the jester's bells ringing. Before placing the last stone, he drops a burning torch through the gap. He claims that he feels sick at heart, but dismisses this reaction as an effect of the dampness of the catacombs.

In the last few sentences, Montresor reveals that in the 50 years since that night, he has never been caught, and Fortunato's body still hangs from its chains in the niche where he left it. The murderer concludes: Requiescat In Pace! ("May he rest in peace!").

PORTRAYED BY:

MONTRESOR

[John Heard]

Although the subject matter of Poe's story is a murder, "The Cask of Amontillado" is not a tale of detection like "The Murders in the Rue Morgue" or "The Purloined Letter"; there is no investigation of Montresor's crime and the criminal himself explains how he committed the murder. The mystery in "The Cask of Amontillado" is in Montresor's motive for murder. Without a detective in the story, it is up to the reader to solve the mystery.

Montresor never specifies his motive beyond the vague "thousand injuries" to which he refers. Many commentators conclude that, lacking significant reason, Montresor must be insane, though even this is questionable because of the intricate details of the plot.

FORTUNATO

[Rene Auberjonois]
Though Fortunato is presented as a connoisseur of fine wine, Cecil L. Moffitt of Texas Christian University argues that his actions in the story make that assumption questionable. For example, Fortunato comments on another nobleman being unable to distinguish Amontillado from Sherry when Amontillado is in fact a type of Sherry, and treats De Grave, an expensive French wine, with very little regard by drinking it in a single gulp. Moffitt also states that a true wine connoisseur would never sample wine while intoxicated and describes Fortunato as merely an alcoholic. Moffitt also suggests that some people might feel Fortunato deserved to be buried alive for wasting a bottle of fine wine.

BCnU!